Just found out that kid #2 has been conceived.

Not sure how it happened.

Condoms, even when used properly (hold tip to get air out for semen room, put on all the way, etc.) aren't fullproof.

I should know what to think now, what with having dealt with it before, but.. gah. This seems like such a bad time for this to happen.

College is just starting to get to a more difficult level, trying out different medications again for my depression (this current one works well, but also fucks with my emotions a lot, causing some random anger and severe depression), I still can't function in everyday life EVERY day and no one will hire me for more than $6/hour pay. I've been leeching money off of my mom for too long and now.. we have LESS income, and MORE expenses.

I kind of want to abort, and kind of don't. I know she doesn't, and since I'm undecided that means we default to birthing the baby. If she is born, there is no way in hell that I'm giving her up.

Oh.. I guess it might be a boy.

I'm stressed and my doctor told me yesterday that my blood pressure is rising. That was before finding this out. Blood pressure not at an unhealthy level yet, but.. it's ALWAYS been lower.

Fuck, I'm going to be in some of my hardest, fast-paced and time consuming classes in spring semester, then again in the next fall and spring semesters. If I take those classes later on, I'll be in school for another year or so, unless I just get my associates degree and stop there.

It takes a stronger, more sane person to deal with so much stress at once.

*hug*

Congratulations. Luckily, you have some experience this time around.

quote:Originally posted by Sick_Boy:

*hug*

*group hug*

To be honest, I would want to abort. One time pain over a lifetime caring for a child.

-deus-

I wish you and your lady the best.

There is never a good or 'right' time to have kids. You will never have enough money, time, inner strength or mental stability to cope with having kids. However you'll make it as we all do.

You won't be a perfect dad nor will your kids have the best possible childhood, the childhood they deserve. None do.But they'll make as we all did.

Anyway congrats and my sincerest best wishes.

Also i wonder if you and she would consider 'blogging' this pregnancy for the forum? Would be kind of nice to have from start to finish archiveable thread on pregnancy. You know, with ultrasound-scan pics and everything? Also how your relationship changes/stresses during it.

Are you sure she's not putting holes in your condoms? Are you sure the kid is yours?



Seriously though, I wish I could offer advice on this but can't. I'm sure you will figure it all out and be fine though.

[This message has been edited by Cloaked Dagger (edited 09-10-2006).]

Good luck, man.

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

Also i wonder if you and she would consider 'blogging' this pregnancy for the forum? Would be kind of nice to have from start to finish archiveable thread on pregnancy. You know, with ultrasound-scan pics and everything? Also how your relationship changes/stresses during it.

That would be the awesomeness! But it does require dedication and enthusiam.

It's the kind of thing I'd do, because I'm interesting in reading and sharing experiences. But I can't just yet!

Hey, Zek! I thought you two were broken up...?

Anyway, If she wants to keep it, there's not much you can do. I really hope things work out for you and that life gets easier soon. I know what it's like to try and deal with every day stresses compounded by depression/anxiety.

All you can do is your best...I mean a lot of other people deal with this kind of thing and they somehow get through it, so you should be okay in the end as well.

And if you want someone to...talk to, my e-mail is alia@333.org. I think you and I share a lot of the same problems and I know it can be helpful to talk to someone who "understands."

[This message has been edited by Xiao Mei (edited 09-10-2006).]

Not to be an ass, and my prayers are out to you. But... if you're gonna do the deed, you should be prepared for the worst.

And if you can't afford this child, then DO NOT have him/her. Bad idea to have a kid you can't afford to grow up properly, etc.



-SURPRISE-

quote:Originally posted by mr.surprise:



And if you can't afford this child, then DO NOT have him/her. Bad idea to have a kid you can't afford to grow up properly, etc.



-SURPRISE-

You're wrong. With the exception of people like Mr.Gates and the Sultan of Brunei nobody can afford kids.

Ask any of the parents here or sit down and work out what your dad was earning when he met your mum...

quote:Originally posted by Euda:

Congratulations. Luckily, you have some experience this time around.

First, thanks.

Second.. I try not to bitch too much about the parent thing, but.. fuck. It's so hard. For many it's easy I'm sure, but I can't deal with MYSELF even, and have chronic severe depression that often prevents me from doing simple things like getting out of bed, showering, eating, working (money), keeping up with school, comforting my daughter when her teeth are hurting her, talking to people, driving and not falling asleep.

Add a baby (or two..) into the mix and you have one shitty dad.

Reasons I don't an abortion are that.. I really do LOVE having my current daughter, and don't do too badly with her as to screw her up. I really enjoy helping my daughter understand the world, herself and everything around her. Once she's older, I want to be there for her when she needs anything and just.. help her grow into the woman she is destined to be.

I love having a family. I don't always like it, but I never stop loving it. Not even when the baby is screaming all night 'till she gets hoarse because she has a mild case of gas.

I can explain it better. When she was around 6 months, she came down with a terrible case of pneumonia. She was so miseraable and sick.. I really can't explain the feeling of helplessness and sadness that overcame me when she to cry to us (no sound came out), and then screamed this unhuman, distorted and garbled gasp of pure pain from the attempted cry. Knowing that there was nothing more you could be doing than holding her while the medical staff administers their shit is.. oh god. It wasn't all bad though. I would hold her and rock her, and know that I was doing something to comfort her. Eventually, she'd stop her horrible screams and fall asleep in my arms. That was a very powerful feeling, and it made me a better person, I think. Even just being in the same room as her made me feel like I had a purpose in life. I try not to forget that.

The examples don't have to be sad either, heh. Just a few weeks ago, her teachers told us that she would be moving up a "level", with more mature kids (some are 2). She left behind kids that were a few months older than her, because she has a bigger vocabulary, is much more active and just more mature in most, if not all, aspects. Overwhelming feeling of pride there, hehe. Seems kind of dumb to be proud of her just because she's learning faster, as everyone develops differently and it doesn't necessarily mean she's any better than the other kids, but..

/pride

It made my day. ^^

I enjoy being a dad for those reasons, and have so far had a good overall time. Another kid would be much of the same with a LOT of differences. Reading over that again makes it sound like those are selfish reasons to enjoy parenting, but.. I don't think the reasons matter, so long as there is love and a mostly capable parent.

Also, I think it's healthier for a kid to have siblings than not.

Reasons for abortion:

I'm deathly afraid of messing up, going into another psychotic episode and killing myself. Or.. somehow screwing the kids up because of my personal problems. Enough said for reasons not to have the kid.

Heh. After writing all of this, looking at the pros and cons.. I've decided that I want another. Still stressful and.. so blah, but.. it happened. ^^

When my best friends dad found out that my girlfriend was pregnant with my first, he said, "Good." He had known me very well for 12 years, and thought it to be the best thing for me.

He himself was a teen parent, and after a long talk with him.. I realized how making a commitment to your kids and sticking to it can make you a better person, despite your problems. He was like me in many ways. Severely depressed, young and regretful. He found out his girlfriend was pregnant, started working out everyday, joined the army and is now doing a good job as a parent of three, aged 18, 17 and 15.

Another member of the Zek family is on the way, whether anyone is ready or not. ^^

And jack, I'll ask her about the blog thing.

We're busy as it is though, and it would definatly not be the best.. but would be interesting. I want to do it.

Heh, and even if she agrees (probably will), you know how fun pregnant women can be. ^^

Congratulations on your fearless latex-devouring ninjasperm Zek.

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

You're wrong. With the exception of people like Mr.Gates and the Sultan of Brunei nobody can afford kids.

Ask any of the parents here or sit down and work out what your dad was earning when he met your mum...

although you're right Jack he makes a point as well.

My parents were dirt poor when they made me, and my life was a living hell, and I had to go through shit I would never wish upon anyone. So in my opinion if you dont have enough to raise a child comfortably (a roof over your head, and ample food in their stomachs) dont have one.

My parents were dirt poor when they met. Hence why they waited until they were rich rich RICH before having my sister and I. My dad was 37 and my mom was 30 when she was born and she is 6 years older than me.:/

I had a bad chilhood, though and believe me I'm the first person to say that money isn't everything.

And Zek...Maybe join the military?

[This message has been edited by Xiao Mei (edited 09-10-2006).]

Military, at this point in time, is the opposite of being a good dad.

A childhood friend of mine got his girlfriend pregnant at about the same time I did. She ended up with twins.

In an effort to escape the parental lifestyle, he joined the army. When their mom had to drop out of high school to watch them because of not enough money to pay for child care, he was in basic. When she had somehow scrounged up enough cash working part-time to afford a month of daycare (so she would work fulltime), he was in stationed in Hawaii.

Now he sends some money (between $100-$200 USD) every month, and is about to head out to Afghanistan for the second time.

If I got married and then joined, things would be very different, but still.. at this point in time, my country is at war and in need of more soldiers to send to dangerous places. Even joining the navy or air force (less chance of being sent to the frontlines) isn't enough of a guarantee. I'm utterly disgusted with the military right now.

I've spent most of my life living in a city with an air force base. Still live here. I have friends in in the military, and one of my dad's coworkers (air force guy) was transferred to the army without his consent and sent to Afghanistan. This is starting to happen more and more, as most people are joining the "safer" branches, and the army is the one that really needs people. If this continues, I can actually see the entire military starting to go under one name, so people aren't outraged when they're taken from the Navy/Air Force and placed into the army.

I could not stand leaving my family for months at a time to aid a cause of often senseless murder (Iraq). I won't risk dying even for a cause I agree with (Afghanistan), because my family needs me.

Don't get me wrong though, there are plently of great mothers and fathers in the military. My girlfriend's dad, for instance, has been Air Force for many years, and is actually one of the best fathers I've had the pleasure of getting to know.

He has been forced to leave his family for months at a time though, and that is hard on everyone. Probably harder on him than his kids, honestly..

Actually, yeah. Military kids never seem to have any serious problems as a result of their parents being gone for months at a time. It's a tough time, but once the parents get back there's usually a huge effort to catch up and all seems well in the end.

It's just me. I'm afraid of being away from my family. Heh, that lifestlye takes someone stronger than me I guess.

It actually reminds me of my greatest (so far ^^) parental regret. When she was first born, I was (as usual) going through a rough time dealing with myself. The sudden responsibility thrust upon me made my anxiety worse than ever before and right away I felt scared to go back to work (lost that job) and once school started, I dropped out soon as well.

With my anxiety at such a high level, I easily gave into pressure, especially from parties that seemed to have authority over me.

Baby's grandma on her mom's side was brought up in a very.. (trying to think of a nice word for sexist.. nope, not thinking of any) sexist culture. Girlfriend was finishing high school that year (finishing early and taking difficult classes even ^^) and I was doing nothing but driving her and baby places/sleeping through my depression-comma. I wanted to watch baby during the day, but at the time felt useless and constantly had suicidal thoughts, deluding myself into thinking that baby would be better off without me and.. stuff.

Baby's grandma mentioned above would always "offer" in a very demanding yet.. non-offensive (?) way, to watch baby during the day. Being in that state, feeling like I couldn't be a good dad, and feeling very anxious and awkward around people.. I gave in VERY easily. Girlfriend was kind of upset about it at times, as was I, but I used that time to somewhat come out of my depressive state.

I wish that I'd been able to have politely asked (demanded) that I spend the day watching my daughter. Makes me sad that I really only spend time with her from the late afternoon-mornings.

Sorry, this is long and random. Can you tell I'm nervous?

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

You're wrong. With the exception of people like Mr.Gates and the Sultan of Brunei nobody can afford kids.

Ask any of the parents here or sit down and work out what your dad was earning when he met your mum...



My Dad was earning £120,000 a year when he met my mother. He owned his own company (environmental consultancy specialising in asbestos) and it was just around the time of the huge asbestos controversy stuff.

All downhill after that, and I completely agree with you, Jack. It's not as if either of my parents have low incomes and they still have to be tight with money. Three kids'll cost you a shitload.

Zek: I respect that you don't like the military...Hell I HATE the air force and pretty much everything it stands for. HOWEVER my husband came from nothing, his parents literally pushed him out the door the day he turned 18 and said, "You're on your own now, buddy." His brother had been a marine and to make a long story short, this inspired my husband to join the air force. The military paid for his college (He went during his first enlistment) and after 6 years of being enlisted he was able to get a commission. He has now been in for 12 years and has attained the rank of captain. He makes about $4000 per month and we get free healthcare and free housing. There's pretty much no danger of him getting sent to Iraq, because of the nature of his job. And those guys getting forced into the army, were being "Force shaped." Basically they had non-essential jobs and were given the option to join the arm,y or be chaptered out of the air force. This would never happen to my husband because he is an intelligence officer.

Oh and my husband doesn't have to spend all that much time away from us. This year he has only had to be gone for one 6 week stretch and that was for training. Most air force people don't have to go TDY for more than 90 days (total) per year.

I'm not saying you should or shouldn't join, but...It is something to think about. It would provide free college for you, a home and free healthcare for your family and most importantly a steady paycheck. Sometimes you have to sacrifice for your kids. My husband is signing up for another 4 year commission, because he just can't risk getting out just yet. He hates the air force, but he's willing to suck it up and have a job he hates for our family. And he knows it's not forever...You should really think about it, Zek. You seem like a guy who wants the best things in the world for his family. Can you really provide that now?

as Jack said ther is no perfect time for a baby,but they happen,my wife and i are expecting our baby in feb,and really it couldnt have happened at a worse possible time,im just getting over back surgery,plus just got into a motorcycle wreck, bills are coming in faster than they can get paid,my wife,bless her heart,is working her ass off,and stressing about needing this and that before the baby gets here,together we make a great living,but also like jack said unless yur a millionaire you always need more money,......heres the thing though,you will make it,all you have to do is want to,that child will make all the sacrifices you've made worth it,the first time he/she smiles at you,everything else will go away and you will know you will do whatever you have to in order to take care and protect this precious life, im not meaning to sound gooey here,but its the truth.......im a big tattooed biker,but my children are my heart.this is our first...but i have a 8 year old from a previous marriage

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

You're wrong. With the exception of people like Mr.Gates and the Sultan of Brunei nobody can afford kids.

Ask any of the parents here or sit down and work out what your dad was earning when he met your mum...



I'd rather not disclose that, but I'll just say 150,000+ together.

They told me I wasn't a real hassle growing up. Emotionally maybe, but financially no.

What I was saying, you don't wanna have a kid if you mentally do not want it. One of my friends parents told him they didn't wanna have him, he was a mistake, they were seriously considering abortion, etc. How would you feel if your parents felt like that towards you?

http://img180.imageshack.us/img180/4555/05a4bfe84eff640f774e32215f88re7.th.jpg (http: //img180.i mageshack. us/my.php? image=05a4 bfe84eff64 0f774e3221 5f88re7.jp g)

Despite this dude basically crumbling, I have respect, cause I know he'll hold up. He's doing 5x more with his life than I am. good luck man.

Oh my God. This fucking FAGGOT has KIDS? Why doesn't child protective services take it's kids away?

quote:Originally posted by mr.surprise:



I'd rather not disclose that, but I'll just say 150,000+ together.

They told me I wasn't a real hassle growing up. Emotionally maybe, but financially no.

What I was saying, you don't wanna have a kid if you mentally do not want it. One of my friends parents told him they didn't wanna have him, he was a mistake, they were seriously considering abortion, etc. How would you feel if your parents felt like that towards you?

UHm my mother tried to abort me..is that answer enough? (No i'm not joking).

Fuck, I'm so stressed out that I'm starting to get sick. This used to be a horrible problem of mine.

My head and back have been constantly aching, and just now while trying to get to sleep my arm started burning/itching a little and now the entire arm is covered in hives. I used to always get hives when stressed out, but that was a while ago.

Auhg, help me.. please?

quote:Originally posted by Sick_Boy:

*hug*

Cheers,

Lost

All this talk about group hugs...Circle jerk?

quote:Originally posted by soro_one:

All this talk about group hugs...Circle jerk?

I'd end up getting someone else pregnant.

Yes, someone with a penis.

quote:Originally posted by HandOfZek:

I used to always get hives when stressed out, but that was a while ago.

Seriously, what the fuck are hives?

quote:Originally posted by arquin:

Seriously, what the fuck are hives?

Like.. red, itchy bumps that spread quickly.

People often get them from touching something they're allergic to.

quote:Originally posted by HandOfZek:

Like.. red, itchy bumps that spread quickly.

People often get them from touching something they're allergic to.

Fuck, do they subside on their own?

Also, dude this is going to be really tough. You're probably going to want to kill your self, but fortunatly you wont, otherwise you would have already. You'll get through this next child like you got through your daughter. You'll be a good dad.

Are you still together with your daughter's mother?

But yeah, look into getting on benzos. You really, really, REALLY sound like you've got bad anxiety and need to chill.

You seem like you're working flat out. Have you considered taking like 1-2 days off before things get uber hectic (spring classes) and catching up on sleep/rest?

Even though a break wont be productive in your studies/financial situation, it might help you collect your self and get a grip on things.

Just an idea..

Benzos would be so nice.

I can't sleep.

Hives made it to chest.

I feel a need to vomit.

Zek buddy I think your mind might not be so "undecided" about the possibility of abortion...

Frankly I've been concerned enough about you snapping in recent months and either having a full scale breakdown, or worse, committing suicide.

And that was *before* the news of your girlfriends second pregnancy.

Think long and hard about how the stress caused by a second child at this point in your life is likely to affect your mental state.

That is to say, if the alternatives are either to be there as a father for your daughter, or to have fathered two children only to then have a breakdown or commit suicide.

I can only imagine how difficult the decision will be. My thoughts will be with you.

-----------------------

I edited this because i'd like the thread to stay on topic and not get dragged down into the usual pro/anti abortion row. Sorry.

[This message has been edited by jackketch (edited 09-11-2006).]

That was out of line jack.

quote:Originally posted by fullcircle:

That was out of line jack.

I read it seconds after you posted it, and since it was aimed only at me there's no harm in it being edited.. fairly or no.

I don't know. When I first started this thread and got into it earlier today, I felt okayish. Now I feel sick and on the brink of psychosis.

I'm lost.

EDIT: My body feels like it's falling away from my mind. I was fucking happy a few hours ago.

[This message has been edited by HandOfZek (edited 09-11-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by fullcircle:

That was out of line jack.



Sorry you feel that way. It isn't personal but i'd like Zek's thread not to become a rant for either side of the abortion debate. Certainly as an anti-abortionist i was offended by what you wrote....and i guess others too would have felt the urge to 'refute'.

edit. The fact that a comment causes me offense of course DOES NOT mean it will get deleted btw. There are posters who are an offense to me and affront to humanity in general in themselves.But i force myself not to 'zap' them.

But there are a few topics (abortion, circumcision) which are a dead cert for ruined threads.



[This message has been edited by jackketch (edited 09-11-2006).]

That would perhaps be a justifiable pretext for editing my post, had it in fact been a simple ideological statement in favor of abortion.

But it wasn't. It had nothing to do with partisan arguments on the subject. It was a presentation of the ethical implications particular to Zek's circumstances.

Although I myself am not partial to either side of the abortion debate, I am sensitive to the views of those who are. Now had I unwittingly made a particularly offensive comment here, and my fault had been pointed out to me, I'd have happily apologised. Had anyone been offended, then as you said they could have "refuted" my words.

But you didn't even allow me such an opportunity. What you did amounts to bald-faced censorship, and in my view you did not even have justifiable grounds to do so, I suspect it had more to do with your own personal experiences that you alluded to than any impartial moral objection to what I had said.

However offended you may have been by my comments, I assure you I am similarly offended by your actions.

quote:Originally posted by fullcircle:

That would perhaps be a justifiable pretext for editing my post, had it in fact been a simple ideological statement in favor of abortion.

But it wasn't. It had nothing to do with partisan arguments on the subject. It was a presentation of the ethical implications particular to Zek's circumstances.

I would have been surprised and disappointed if it had been a simplistic ideological statement. In my experience you don't go in for those. Infact it was a perfectly 'reasonable' statement ('reasonable' by the standards of most people i guess). If it had been a ideologistic rant then i would have just deleted it without comment or apologies (which were sincere).

quote:Although I myself am not partial to either side of the abortion debate, I am sensitive to the views of those who are. Now had I unwittingly made a particularly offensive comment here, and my fault had been pointed out to me, I'd have happily apologised. Had anyone been offended, then as you said they could have "refuted" my words.

I know the possible offense wasn't intended. However your choice of words was unfortunate.

quote:But you didn't even allow me such an opportunity. What you did amounts to bald-faced censorship, and in my view you did not even have justifiable grounds to do so, I suspect it had more to do with your own personal experiences that you alluded to than any impartial moral objection to what I had said.

Yes it was bald faced censorship.And it was unfair, make no mistake about that. It is something i personally detest doing and it goes against the whole ethos of totse.

I comforted myself with the thought that even if Zek hadn't read your post before i censored it then he is intelligent enough to understand what you were trying to say from what i left of it.

I'm sorry you think i might have acted out of my own prejudice. I have however in the past demonstrably shown no favour in such editings.

quote:However offended you may have been by my comments, I assure you I am similarly offended by your actions.

Buddy there is no way , no how you can be more offended by my actions than i am myself. Censoring a post of a poster of your or Zek's calibre leaves a nasty taste.



[This message has been edited by jackketch (edited 09-11-2006).]

After my little outburst, I realised it's not such a big deal really, the whole subject of abortion is an electrified third rail. Naturally, there are various topics that I am extremely sensitive about myself. Well no harm done, as I've said I think you're a very good mod jack.

quote:Originally posted by fullcircle:

After my little outburst, I realised it's not such a big deal really, the whole subject of abortion is an electrified third rail. Naturally, there are various topics that I am extremely sensitive about myself. Well no harm done, as I've said I think you're a very good mod jack.



No your 'outburst' was totally justified and i'm not sure myself if i didn't over react.I could have waited to see if the comment did indeed lead to the usual 'murder can never be ethical' broadside.

My only defence is that i have seen far to many good threads ruined by the abortion debate (yeah i helped ruin more than a few of them myself in my time here.)

AT LAST!! WE (by that I mean me) FINALLY KNOW WHAT YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION AND GENDER IS!

quote:Originally posted by ajardoor:

AT LAST!! WE (by that I mean me) FINALLY KNOW WHAT YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION AND GENDER IS!

Shut the fuck up and get back under your god damn bridge you mother fucking troll!

You see that sentence you wrote? It had the letter 'A' in it. You see that button to the left of the letter A? It's like what, 2mm away? Fucking press it you piece of shit.

quote:Originally posted by arquin:

You see that sentence you wrote? It had the letter 'A' in it. You see that button to the left of the letter A? It's like what, 2mm away? Fucking press it you piece of shit.

Well, actually, I used the shift key....

quote:Originally posted by ajardoor:

Well, actually, I used the shift key....

Class act...

I know what you mean about feeling like you're gonna have a breakdown. I've been feeling like that every goddamned day for the past few months. It's like you feel as though everythings getting away from you and whirling around you and if you could just be calm for a second then you could grab some of it back and get it together.

I was at the PX yesterday and this old woman was staring at me and...I kind of lost it because I thought she was controlling my mind. Then I saw this woman who (I swear) had hair of flames and yellow eyes with slitted pupils. She turned and saw me and I let out this rather undignified sound and clapped my hands over my eyes. My husband is standing there going, "What? WHAT??" And all I can think about is how I can't tell him, because he'll just think I'm crazy.

To be like us is to be alone, because no one understands.

A lot of people would probably think I'm unfit to raise a child, but see I have my husband who is very stable and who takes care of me. Is your girlfriend like that? Can she help you and deal with it if you DO have a breakdown?

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

e-mail is alia@333.org.

Why did you choose the name "alia"?

It's my daughter's name.

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:



I was at the PX yesterday and this old woman was staring at me and...I kind of lost it because I thought she was controlling my mind. Then I saw this woman who (I swear) had hair of flames and yellow eyes with slitted pupils. She turned and saw me and I let out this rather undignified sound and clapped my hands over my eyes. My husband is standing there going, "What? WHAT??" And all I can think about is how I can't tell him, because he'll just think I'm crazy.



Tell him what??! Sounds perfectly normal to me. Or do you really think that supermarkets aren't Gateways or Portals to HELL itself, and thus populated not only by 'fire demons' (like you saw) but all manner of vile satanic supernatural creatures??!

DID you really think that annoying smelly granny who somehow always manages to be in your way, no matter what aisle you try and escape to, and always manages to cough on you at the till... was really human??!

Have you never noticed how come it's always you who gets the trolley with the broken wheel that will only go in anti-clockwise (ie 'widdershins')circles??! Or how it's squeak has just the right frequency to send you insane?



You are sooo naive , girl. Next you'll be telling me that those places sell 'food'!

THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE!



[This message has been edited by jackketch (edited 09-11-2006).]

...What's up with you calling the "cart" a "trolley?"

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

...What's up with you calling the "cart" a "trolley?"



Same thing as you not calling the following by their right names: curtains,taps,autumn,polenta,garage,petrol,rubbish ,lorry etc etc

What are "taps" and "lorry?"

And we DO say "garage" and "autumn"!

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

What are "taps" and "lorry?"

And we DO say "garage" and "autumn"!

taps = faucets

lorry = truck

Yes but you misuse/mispronounce 'garage' and lot of times you say 'fall' for autumn.

how are we not using curtain right,,,,a curtain is somethig you cover a window with right?what do you call them?

quote:Originally posted by arquin:

You see that button to the left of the letter A? It's like what, 2mm away?

try 2 centimetres

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

It's my daughter's name.

Cool. It's my sister's name, too.

...wait. Mom? Is that you? Oh god, I have to delete all my posts now.

[This message has been edited by heisler2 (edited 09-11-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by heisler2:

Cool. It's my sister's name, too.

...wait. Mom? Is that you? Oh god, I have to delete all my posts now.



Haha, I have been spying on you this whole time!!!

Anyway, are your parents "Dune" fans?

Someones b/f forgot to log out ...

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

There is never a good or 'right' time to have kids. You will never have enough money, time, inner strength or mental stability to cope with having kids. However you'll make it as we all do.

You won't be a perfect dad nor will your kids have the best possible childhood, the childhood they deserve. None do.But they'll make as we all did.

Anyway congrats and my sincerest best wishes.

Also i wonder if you and she would consider 'blogging' this pregnancy for the forum? Would be kind of nice to have from start to finish archiveable thread on pregnancy. You know, with ultrasound-scan pics and everything? Also how your relationship changes/stresses during it.



I think blogging would be a good idea. I go crazy if I'm not doing something now. When I was first pregnant, I went to summer school, though I hadn't failed anything, just to keep busy. I think I'd have a lot of fun doing this. It would even help me with a school assignment I have coming up.

So how do YOU feel about this pregnancy?

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

So how do YOU feel about this pregnancy?

A little apprehensive. A little excited. I little scared. A little everything.

I don't know if I could go through with an abortion. I know that is would be a lot 'less stressful' to take the easy way out. But I don't know if I could live with myself knowing that I killed a being which would ultimately have it's own, separate existence.

I've finally decided that I won't get an abortion. I love my daughter too much to take away a part of her, as well as me, as well as Zek.

I think we'll be okay. I think maybe it will even be a bit easier. I'm not in High School anymore and this time around, am considered an actual adult. I won't have to deal with the embarrassment of not being able to provide for my children because I was not "of age."

Things will be better for me this time around. I can be with the kids and take online classes while Zek goes to his seated classes. By next fall semester I can easily have both of my children in daycare and continue where I left off.

I can do it. I'm ready... I think.

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:



Haha, I have been spying on you this whole time!!!

Anyway, are your parents "Dune" fans?

Not that I know of. Phew. I guess I'm safe. For now...

quote:Originally posted by Hardly There:

A little apprehensive. A little excited. I little scared. A little everything.

I don't know if I could go through with an abortion. I know that is would be a lot 'less stressful' to take the easy way out. But I don't know if I could live with myself knowing that I killed a being which would ultimately have it's own, separate existence.

I've finally decided that I won't get an abortion. I love my daughter too much to take away a part of her, as well as me, as well as Zek.

I think we'll be okay. I think maybe it will even be a bit easier. I'm not in High School anymore and this time around, am considered an actual adult. I won't have to deal with the embarrassment of not being able to provide for my children because I was not "of age."

Things will be better for me this time around. I can be with the kids and take online classes while Zek goes to his seated classes. By next fall semester I can easily have both of my children in daycare and continue where I left off.

I can do it. I'm ready... I think.

You sound level headed and mature...More so than me and I'm like 8 years older than you are!

Are you and Zek getting along better? Is he really as...incapable as he describes himself, or is he just insecure and self-doubting?

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

You sound level headed and mature...More so than me and I'm like 8 years older than you are!

Are you and Zek getting along better? Is he really as...incapable as he describes himself, or is he just insecure and self-doubting?

The latter. It's more that he puts himself in the mental state that if he tries, he won't succeed. He's just insecure and self-doubting. We are getting along better these days. It's rough when we don't. :-/

I've always liked you, HandOfZek, I mean the advice I have to offer you doesn't go well into the whole picture. I would storngly recommend smoking some weed, but seeing as you're a "family man", you wouldn't want to waste money on that stuff or bring it around the family... well damn, I truly do feel for you... I guess best of luck to ya. I never really know what to say in these situations anymore...

quote:Originally posted by Hardly There:

The latter. It's more that he puts himself in the mental state that if he tries, he won't succeed. He's just insecure and self-doubting. We are getting along better these days. It's rough when we don't. :-/

I know what you mean. I hate it when my husband and I don't get along. We went through a rough time a few months ago and I was really depressed. I think I might be too dependant on him, because then when we get along it's like life is worth living again.:/

Ooh, she found the post before I thought to ask.

She's also going to be one of the first to read this reply, as she's on the desktop below meh. (^^)

My medication (been seeing head doctors again) has been screwing with me lately, and having just had the dosage upped the day before we found out she was pregnant.. my mind was not coping well. I missed a few classes and got more stressed out, but now I'm in a good mood and about to go back to chat with my instructors about making up the past week or so (IE: making up false excuses as to why I didn't do the online tests by the extended dates that were set).

The unusual method by which this doctor is going about treating me (concerta, for in his words: regulating my sleeping cycle, helping with concentration issues that are byproducts of my depression/anxiety) seem to overall improve me mood, minimize my depression and surprisingly, entirely eliminates illogical anxiety like fearing talking to my daughter's 3-year old friend. After getting the daily dose figured out and adjusting to it (still getting used to it, but making obvious improvements daily), I feel much more confident in my abilties to function in life.

Night before last was rough, but I feel better.

We're all but decided on going through with the next kid, and have started plans for the best route to take to get us both through college as quickly as possible.

Now: to shower.

quote:Originally posted by HandOfZek:

and have started plans for the best route to take to get us both through college as quickly as possible.

Now: to shower.

Thats' the way forward. Get some education and earn some decent money. You'll still be broke of course...even if you both earn 50K! But it'll be a different level of broke.

I feel very liberated after our long talk. And unfortunately I am not the first to reply.. Someone beat me to it.

I like what this medicine is doing to you overall. I can't really remember the last time that your overall mood was like this. I'm loving it.

I'm loving you.

I love happy endings.

Congratulations, i guess.

Things'll work out though, be sure of that.

And have you tried 5-htp for depression?

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

I love happy endings.



Don't know if I would call it a happy ending.

quote:Originally posted by Hardly There:

Don't know if I would call it a happy ending.

She's right.

It's not an ending, and it's definately not happy all of the time.

No matter what they have me on, I'm never going to be sane enough to feel content with everything in life.

Anyway, we'll get the blog or whatever started soon. Maybe tonight, since webct es down and I can't do my homework.

/sigh..

Well nobody's happy all of the time or even a lot of the time. Anyone who says different is selling something.:P

So do you think you two will get married? I mean you're going to have TWO kids together...

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

Well nobody's happy all of the time or even a lot of the time. Anyone who says different is selling something.:P

So do you think you two will get married? I mean you're going to have TWO kids together...

Married? And carry the curse of boy cooties for the rest of my life? Ewwww..

Who knows though.. I'd like it.

Heh, men can be kind of trying at times.:P

ZEK <3 HARDLY THER

LUV IS IN DA AIR

quote:Originally posted by HandOfZek:

Benzos would be so nice.

I can't sleep.

Hives made it to chest.

I feel a need to vomit.

Do you not control your thoughts, or what?

quote:Originally posted by Hexadecimal:

Do you not control your thoughts, or what?

This question confuses me.

Everyone can control their thoughts, to an extent. That extent is different for every individual person. No person has complete control over their own thoughts, outside forces influence us all.

..?

I have no control over my thoughts.

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

I have no control over my thoughts.



I have no control over the voices ...they MAKE me do things..Baaaad things to womenzzz..

My thoughts are now telling me to kill Jackketch by immersing him in a pool full of dead gingers!

[This message has been edited by Xiao Mei (edited 09-14-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

My thoughts are now telling me to kill Jackketch by immersing him in a pool full of dead gingers!





Kinky! I mean as long as the nasty sneaky gingerz are dead..then no worries.

Doctor's appointment on Tuesday.

quote:Originally posted by Hardly There:

Doctor's appointment on Tuesday.



We expect a full report. As much detail as possible please.

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:



We expect a full report. As much detail as possible please.



I'm sure it will be more details than you'll want.

quote:Topic: Guess I'm a family man

Abortion.

Adoption.

Sell child to Michael Jackson.

If she's not on board with the above...



Take a trip to mexico and get the abortion pill.



and keep in mind what she doesn't know will most likely not kill her =)

god damn it I thought you killed yourself. I was looking forward to not seeing post after post of you groveling for sympathy you don't deserve.

Lawl.

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

You're wrong. With the exception of people like Mr.Gates and the Sultan of Brunei nobody can afford kids.

Ask any of the parents here or sit down and work out what your dad was earning when he met your mum...



There's a difference between being able to afford the basics for a kid so it's comfortable.



And then there's having kids regardless and getting the state to pay for them.

Thrice.

quote:Originally posted by Hardly There:

Lawl.

So what does it mean when people post this??? I know, I know I'm a n00b...

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

Originally posted by Hardly There:

Lawl.

So what does it mean when people post this??? I know, I know I'm a n00b...



Lol. :P

Ummm you still didn't tell me!

Laughing a whole Lot (http://tinyurl.com/f5snw)

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

Ummm you still didn't tell me!

Say "lol" as if it were a word rather than an acronym. It sounds like Lawl. Hahaha.