Today has been the hardest day of my life. one of my best friends died today, and 2 others critically injured, and i watched it all happen. after school let out today, me and a bunch of others were headed to our friend devins house for a party. we left school in 2 cars, Corey had a convertable mercedes(yes he was a rich kid) that he drove, with devin in the passanger seat, and chris and andrew in the back. and me and pat rode in my car. corey told me when we left to follow him, he was gonna take a back road, so i did, we took a really windy road that went back into the middle of nowhere. corey called me and to keep up, and before i could ask him what he ment, she shot off, he was doing at least 100, i was pushing 80 maybe. corey started to pull ahead, and then everything went into slow motion, i watched his car turn the corner and i could just see corey lose contol, he hit a utility pole. Devins legs were both shattered under the dashboard, from his pelvis to his feet, Andrew sustained massive head trauma and has a 30% chance of life, chris broke his arm, and corey didnt make it. i slammed on my brakes and got out and called 911. the 3 guys are in intesive care right now and ive been praying for them all night.

How do you guys deal with a thing like this? i watched it happen, i let it happen. i feel like some of the guilt lays on my shoulders. i just dont know how to comprehend all of this.

http://img.viacomlocalnetworks.com/images_sizedimage_251174029/lg

http://img.viacomlocalnetworks.com/images_sizedimage_251174112/lg

those are the 2 pictures taken from the news chopper.

I'm sorry to hear about it. I don't really know how you deal with something like that, but I fail to see how it's your fault in any way, shape or form.

Hopefully you find the strength to help you over this.

First of all, it is in no way your fault. Don't feel guilty.

Dealing with the loss of somebody close to you is always an extremely hard thing to do. Unfortunately it's a part of life and growing up. People come and go. Atleast he was in your life for the time he was, hopefully he taught you all a valuable lesson and saved somebody else's life through his own mistakes.

Be there for his family and make sure you stay by your other friends. Just be glad they didn't all end up like Corey.

I wish there was something I could say to make the hurt go away but there really isn't. I'm so terribly sorry and I wish you the best of everything. You'll get over it eventually, just look back on the positive things. I believe everything happens for a reason.

Now you see what can happen when somebody makes a common mistake like this one. It's a shame, it really is a shame.

Jesus, I'm very sorry.

Get off the internet, and force yourself to go and meet up with at least one other person who was a mutual friend.

quote:Originally posted by fullcircle:

Get off the internet, and force yourself to go and meet up with at least one other person who was a mutual friend.

Natural selection, wish this happened more often

I don't feel sorry for morons who intentionally risk their lives by speeding. The other people in the car probably didn't object to it either

quote:Originally posted by Pilsu:

Natural selection, wish this happened more often

I don't feel sorry for morons who intentionally risk their lives by speeding. The other people in the car probably didn't object to it either

I don't really think we're feeling sorry for his friend right now. We're trying to comfort this guy with the loss of it. Regaurdless of how idiotic it was, it's still hard to loose somebody you love. Also, people make mistakes, which a lot of the times does invovle them risking their lives.

If you don't have some sort of sympathy for the people that lost them then my sorrow goes towards you, as well.

Dumbasses. Nature has a way of cleanin' up the gene pool every now and then. Stop being such a girl.

quote:Originally posted by SlapinFoFun:

Dumbasses. Nature has a way of cleanin' up the gene pool every now and then. Stop being such a girl.

Wow, you've obviously never experienced the pain of losing someone you know. Also, you have not hit puberty. That is all.

quote:Originally posted by Pilsu:

Natural selection, wish this happened more often

I don't feel sorry for morons who intentionally risk their lives by speeding. The other people in the car probably didn't object to it either

Exactly, I don't make friend with retards.

quote:Originally posted by SlapinFoFun:

Dumbasses. Nature has a way of cleanin' up the gene pool every now and then. Stop being such a girl.

Obviously lacking in any form of intelligence and subtlety.

quote:Originally posted by struggling artist:

Wow, you've obviously never experienced the pain of losing someone you know. Also, you have not hit puberty. That is all.

hahahaha

Wow dude. That must have been horrible to see. Just remember its not your fault. Hopefully your friends are going to be alright and I'm sorry about your loss.

quote:Originally posted by sylph:

We're trying to comfort this guy with the loss of it.

Oh sorry, I might prefer to spend the effort on Devin, you know, the guy who shall never walk again

Sorry to hear it mate. it's always hard to lose someone close to you...

But you have to look at it from an outside point of view, imagine if they had have hit someone? Better they kill them selfs than someone else.

First off stop praying. Its pointless, god isnt real.

Second, life sucks, then you get high, then you die. Find some random drugs and do them. Or alcohol in a pinch.

[This message has been edited by Rem (edited 09-09-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by Spitfire:

i let it happen

Hopefully you're not still reading this, but if you are: YOU ARE INNOCENT, what happened is a terrible misfortune, and IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU PERSONALLY.

You MUST try and keep this in mind.

I can't recall the statistics off the top of my head, but road accidents are one of the top three causes of death for people under 25, in fact it may even be the single biggest cause of death.

Driving even in the best of conditions is a lot more dangerous than we all realise, it's only when a terrible accident like this occurs that we realise it.

Hundreds, thousands, of guys just like you and your friends are driving at least as dangerously as your friends were today, god knows how many are taking far worse risks. And most of the time, they get away with it. It's just a question of chance.

You couldn't have possibly done anything to prevent this. It's not your fault.

quote:Originally posted by Pilsu:

Oh sorry, I might prefer to spend the effort on Devin, you know, the guy who shall never walk again

It doesn't matter who your sympathy goes towards my point is that we're not discussing what a "dumbass" his friend is.

I understand where you're coming from, however and I agree with it for the most part. I'm just simply making a statement that that's not exactly what we're talking about.

Sorry for the misunderstanding, if you're implying there is one.

Wow. ALl the shit talkers why do you post? If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. Thats a horrible thing to go through, even if they were being idiots. Thats what kids do. Im really sorry for your loss of friend, but theres nothing I can really say to change anything so I won't try.

quote:Originally posted by Pilsu:

Natural selection, wish this happened more often

I don't feel sorry for morons who intentionally risk their lives by speeding. The other people in the car probably didn't object to it either



You don't know that the others didn't object. I've done stupid shit like this and had objections to it...but I pushed my luck anyways. I'm fortunate to have not died. Corey wasn't so lucky...he risked 4 lives, and he didn't beat the odds. He made a stupid decision and paid the biggest price one can...and 3 other people paid physically for something they didn't do; and I'm sure all of the people involved paid partially with emotional pain for something they didn't do.

To the OP: It's going to take a while to get over this, but you have to understand that this isn't your fault. You didn't make him decide to drive a 100, you didn't make him lose control, you didn't make him die. He effectively committed suicide, and it's sad as fuck, but it's not your fault.

quote:Originally posted by Low Rider:

Wow. ALl the shit talkers why do you post? If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. Thats a horrible thing to go through, even if they were being idiots. Thats what kids do. Im really sorry for your loss of friend, but theres nothing I can really say to change anything so I won't try.

Shut you bat hole, you wee little cunt.

On a serious note, i'm sorry for what happened but there's nothing you can really do about it. My dad was killed in a motorcycle accident when I was 11, I know how it feels, just give it some time.

This definately WASN'T your fault. HE was the one calling YOU and telling you to catch up. Te he only time I've hit 100 in my car was going down a 4 lane highway, with verrrry smooth turns.

it is definately not your fault. do you really believe if you had told him to slow down he would have done so? all you can do is be there for your friends when the get out of hospital, though you should probably see someone after something like that (councellor).

No way you could have stopped that man. Have a drink on me.

quote:Originally posted by fullcircle:

I can't recall the statistics off the top of my head, but road accidents are one of the top three causes of death for people under 25, in fact it may even be the single biggest cause of death.

It is. That question was on my driving test.

And to the insensitive person who said they deserve it, fuck you. Grow a heart. You've never driven fast? Then you're a fucking soft cock.

Go buy a vespa, they'll do the speed limit and that's all. But if you have any sort of decent car there's no point of having it unless every now and then you put the pedal to the floor.

I forgot where I was going, but yeah, don't be a faggot.

OP, chin up dude. This wont be comforting, but chances are you haven't even begun to feel the pain. I lost a mate this year in a car crash, and at first I was just blown away, speechless and pretty hurt. Things just built up and got worse building up to the funeral. When the funeral came that's when it began to hurt. I was a blubbering mess, but fortunatly, after that, things get easier. Once you get all the crying out of your system, you'll be better for it.

*edit* totally unrelated, but your name is an awesome song.



[This message has been edited by arquin (edited 09-09-2006).]

Deary, I know guilt is a natural reaction to things like these, but this was in no way your fault.

Gawd, I don't even know what to say... that's awful. I'm really sorry.

Arquin's right though... It's going to keep hurting more and more... but it really does get better after you get it all out. Only time will help heal wounds like that.

quote:Originally posted by SlapinFoFun:

Dumbasses. Nature has a way of cleanin' up the gene pool every now and then. Stop being such a girl.



Date Registered: 03-17-2006

OPINION INVALID

I have to deal with this kind of thing on almost a monthly basis. The best ways I've found to deal with it is through CISD, and I dehumanize the victim within my head. When I have to extricate a body, I'm in the mindset that it's just a pile of flesh. I don't think about the fact that it used to be alive, or carry a personality, or anything like that. I just think about as "I'm pulling some matter out of some metal".

I know it seems cold and heartless, and I doubt it will work for you, since it was your friend, you knew him. I normally don't know the people I have to deal with. In a sense, that makes it a little bit easier.

thanks guys.

i went and saw them in shock trauma last night. devin is in serious pain but hes going to be ok, andrew had surgery on his head and it went well, he most likely will be ok, and chris went home last night.

quote:Originally posted by arquin:

You've never driven fast? Then you're a fucking soft cock.

Or maybe you know, I'm not fucking stupid. Go high 5 Corey and tell him he totally rules for crippling his friend and getting himself killed, at least he's not a soft cock!

quote:Originally posted by Pilsu:

Or maybe you know, I'm not fucking stupid. Go high 5 Corey and tell him he totally rules for crippling his friend and getting himself killed, at least he's not a soft cock!

Driving irresponsibly with passengers is exactly that: irresponsible.

I don't advocate wreckless driving with passengers, but I do advocate wreckless driving on quiet back roads, when you're on your own.

But saying he got what he deserved is fucking harsh, and over the line. You're a dick, and responding to you has made me feel a little bit pathetic.

the person who's fault it is is his family for buying him a powerful car. how old was he? 17? 18? 19? to operate a car like that takes two things - mental maturity and driving skill. to buy a car for some one who doesnt have those is fucking dumb

quote:Originally posted by MomentaryLapseOfReason:

I have to deal with this kind of thing on almost a monthly basis. The best ways I've found to deal with it is through CISD, and I dehumanize the victim within my head. When I have to extricate a body, I'm in the mindset that it's just a pile of flesh. I don't think about the fact that it used to be alive, or carry a personality, or anything like that. I just think about as "I'm pulling some matter out of some metal".

I know it seems cold and heartless, and I doubt it will work for you, since it was your friend, you knew him. I normally don't know the people I have to deal with. In a sense, that makes it a little bit easier.

It's clearly an easy way to get through things, but I can't see that being mentally healthy for you. Truth be told, I'd probably do the same thing, but I'd be worried about sociopathy.

This is why my dad got me a 1988 grand marquis for my first car. I was in SIX accidents while driving it (3 were my fault) and the only damage to the car were a few scratches and a dented fender. The only damage to me were some broken ribs one time.

Kids can be dumb and recklass...My old car wouldn't even GO 100 miles per hour! On a good day I could get it up to about 70 before it started shimmying.

quote:Originally posted by dr rocker:

the person who's fault it is is his family for buying him a powerful car.

Bullshit.

He was driving recklessly - if he'd had a less powerful car he'd have just pushed it harder. In fact Mercedes have one of the most advanced crash protection systems found in any car, so his car offered pretty much the best level of protection possible. If he'd been in a less powerful car, his passengers might have died also.

One thing I'll bet though, is that he probably wasn't wearing a seatbelt. Sadly.

quote:Originally posted by Pilsu:

Or maybe you know, I'm not fucking stupid. Go high 5 Corey and tell him he totally rules for crippling his friend and getting himself killed, at least he's not a soft cock!

QFT

This thread made me laugh. I know it sounds bad, but when I read that one of the guys may never walk again, I burst out laughing.

It's not your fault Spitfire, sounds like the driver got what was coming to him. The other two probably deserve to have been hurt for not stopping him from speeding.

The problem with todays society is that we go against nature. In nature, the stronger, smarter animals survive, and the weaker, dumber animals die. But for some reason, we humans have set up a variety of ways to keep our race's weakest links alive, and they drag the rest of society down with them.

Just be glad that you weren't in the car.

Just out of curiosity, was the driver a jerk? The fact that he was a rich kid, breaking the law, doing something stupid and thinking that he was invincible makes it sound to me like he probably did other stuff that rich jerks (not implying that all rich people are jerks) like to do. Looks like he just got pwnd by karma.

quote:Originally posted by Vampire Archimiel:



Date Registered: 03-17-2006

OPINION INVALID

*waits for the "No, I lost my old account!" speech*

quote:Originally posted by fullcircle:

Bullshit.

He was driving recklessly - if he'd had a less powerful car he'd have just pushed it harder. In fact Mercedes have one of the most advanced crash protection systems found in any car, so his car offered pretty much the best level of protection possible. If he'd been in a less powerful car, his passengers might have died also.

One thing I'll bet though, is that he probably wasn't wearing a seatbelt. Sadly.



yes, mercedes do have a decent crash protection system, i agree. i wasnt making a point on that. i was making a point on the fact the car they bought him was so powerful, which is a bad idea.

if you push any car past the limit of your driving skill, you are going to loose, simple as. if you have a car that gives you more feedback ,no, i dont mean a traction control light, i mean feedback through steering and feel of the car, then you can judge your skill, the cars grip and if you are going to off it or not. i dont work for a benz dealer but i have driven all classes of benz and all engine sizes that are currntly available, have a good degree of driving skill and i can safely say their are many more makes and models of cars on the road that have better road holding charecteristics and feedback. most small cars with even weight distrobution that have a fraction of the power and also a fraction of the safety features, where you would loose control at much lower speeds and not have a fatal accident.

so its not bullshit

quote:Originally posted by dr rocker:



yes, mercedes do have a decent crash protection system, i agree. i wasnt making a point on that. i was making a point on the fact the car they bought him was so powerful, which is a bad idea.

if you push any car past the limit of your driving skill, you are going to loose, simple as. if you have a car that gives you more feedback ,no, i dont mean a traction control light, i mean feedback through steering and feel of the car, then you can judge your skill, the cars grip and if you are going to off it or not. i dont work for a benz dealer but i have driven all classes of benz and all engine sizes that are currntly available, have a good degree of driving skill and i can safely say their are many more makes and models of cars on the road that have better road holding charecteristics and feedback. most small cars with even weight distrobution that have a fraction of the power and also a fraction of the safety features, where you would loose control at much lower speeds and not have a fatal accident.

so its not bullshit

I disagree, you can get Mercedes Convertibles with way small engines dude, like 2 litre 4 cylinders man.. I mean, would I rather my kid in that or a V8 Ford, I'd got for the merc man.

quote:Originally posted by Garfunkel:

I disagree, you can get Mercedes Convertibles with way small engines dude, like 2 litre 4 cylinders man.. I mean, would I rather my kid in that or a V8 Ford, I'd got for the merc man.



do you know what disagree means? you have just agreed with me! i stated that it was wrong to put an inexperienced driver in a powerful car. you can get a 1.4l merc if you want in an A class. i was saying tis wrong to put kids in powerful cars, not necicerally merc. a 1.8 merc produces 143bhp wich imo is too much for some one inexperienced

It was his own fault for driving like a prat.

Not your fault, at least there is one less retard on the roads now.

quote:Originally posted by arquin:



*edit* totally unrelated, but your name is an awesome song.



As it happens, it's also the name of a sports car. Which would be funny, if this thread wasn't so tragic.

http://www.mediumurl.com?r=6017027935615977516814035

Spitfire, I can't even begin to comprehend what you must be feeling now and I know nothing that I can say will make you feel better, but you have my deepest sympathies. And like everyone has been saying, do not feel guilty, calling 911 is all you could have done.

Dont feel guilty.

I know what it feels like to have a friend killed before your eyes because he did something stupid. At least your friend was probably killed instantly. My friend lasted about five minutes after being shot in the heart with a shotgun.

You did what you could. He drove like an idiot and now hes dead. At least be thankful your actions probably save the two others. (Im not including broke-arm guy because thats not usually life threatening )

[This message has been edited by ArgonPlasma2000 (edited 09-12-2006).]

This is great. I hate idiots who endanger others by doing stupid shit in their sports cars. I hope all your friends die. It's just a shame that they didn't get burned alive in a high octane inferno.

Pawned.

Well, a person in that position could have done alot to save the situation...

But I'm just grateful there was no Bel-Air.

Something like this happened to one of my friends too. He was riding in a convertible car with 3 others and they flipped over doing 80 and he got ejected from the seat and landed on his head some feet away from the car. he wasnt wearing his seat belt (explains alot). The other 3 were wearing seat belt thats why they didnt get hurt as bad. So my friend is in a coma for 2 weeks he has like 2 diffrent surgeries to his skull. He survived, but he is kind of slow now since he landed on his head. He had a chunk of his brain by his stomach or something like that to preserve it. But hes all better now... And slow.