Ok so at like 6:30 this morning I fell out of my recliner/bed and this caused one of the pornos in the armrest thing to fall onto the floor. Needless to say when my mom walked in at like 7am to wake me up she saw it and I was like OH shit lol because she just said"5lesbian sluts on something?" and I didnt see the porn right away but I knew what she was talking about lol. She just walked out but I was curious if anyone else had little experinces like this where their mom or dad found their stuff lol. It was quiet funny as hell although quiet embarrassing. The funny thing is that that magazine wasnt mine, see my step dad has a major collection of porn like at least 30 and one of my moms friends was staying the weekend with her kids and one is 14 needless to say he found them in my step dads bathroom and I was like just put it in my room and get it when you leave(so his mom doesnt find it in their bags and all) but he forgot it lol.

Wow you sure did laugh out loud a great deal. Are you ok?

I think it's safe to say that a majority of people go through at least one horribly embarassing moment with their family in regards to sex. I don't know how many times I've been walked in on whilst entangled with a female. Just be glad she didn't walk in on you spanking it.

Well there was this one time I was jerkin off on the family room couch not really paying attenion, half watching the TV at the same time ...with a full bladder. So I'm finnaly cumming after about 20min of watching TV, I lean back, close my eyes and ready a paper towel and as it's moving out I notice a it feels like a lot more than usual. I open my eyes and....I have just pissed all over the family room couch. I jump up scard as hell going "oh fuck, oh fuck" and after four hours of cleaning for 11:00pm to 3:00am, I cleaned that couch over and over. My parents never found out and later gave the couch to good wiil. But i'll tell ya it was interesting to see the family sit n' lay on that couch after that.

quote:Originally posted by OCC-402:

...with a full bladder. So I'm finnaly cumming after about 20min of watching TV, I lean back, close my eyes and ready a paper towel and as it's moving out I notice a it feels like a lot more than usual. I open my eyes and....I have just pissed all over the family room couch.

If you really thought you were cumming and you ended up pissing - you're a fucking idiot.

I have no where to hide my pornos, my mum keeps finding them. Which sucks, 'cause then she hides them from me.

Where do you hide your pornos?

I wrap mine up inside a shirt inside my cupboard.

I'm quite sure it's impossible to pee while you have an erection. Also, I agree with that other guy. You are a fucking dipshit!

quote:Originally posted by OCC-402:

Well there was this one time I was jerkin off on the family room couch not really paying attenion, half watching the TV at the same time ...with a full bladder. So I'm finnaly cumming after about 20min of watching TV, I lean back, close my eyes and ready a paper towel and as it's moving out I notice a it feels like a lot more than usual. I open my eyes and....I have just pissed all over the family room couch. I jump up scard as hell going "oh fuck, oh fuck" and after four hours of cleaning for 11:00pm to 3:00am, I cleaned that couch over and over. My parents never found out and later gave the couch to good wiil. But i'll tell ya it was interesting to see the family sit n' lay on that couch after that.

I did that in the bath one time.

quote:Originally posted by EssJay:

I have no where to hide my pornos, my mum keeps finding them. Which sucks, 'cause then she hides them from me.

Where do you hide your pornos?

I wrap mine up inside a shirt inside my cupboard.

Here's a method a mate told me:Take the bottom drawer out of a bedside table or chest of drawers and store the porn in between the floor and the bottom of the drawer.

quote:Originally posted by Yeah Im a leopard:

Here's a method a mate told me:Take the bottom drawer out of a bedside table or chest of drawers and store the porn in between the floor and the bottom of the drawer.

My room is too cramped to do that. I'd have to move half the shit on my floor just so I could get the drawer out

Well I had mine hidden in the arm of my chair like inside of it. But I mean I don't think my mom actually looks for porn in my room. Moms that look for kids porn and then confiscate it are horrible and messed up, also if they confront the kid thats even worse because not only do they take away thier kids sexual outlet they embarrase the hell out of kids. Also it is totally possible to piss with an erection although if your pissing into a toliet it is hard as hell to get it in accuratly.

quote:Originally posted by river_of_ash:

I'm quite sure it's impossible to pee while you have an erection. Also, I agree with that other guy. You are a fucking dipshit!

its possible but real difficult. you have to sit down and push it down

quote:Originally posted by AprenticeChemist:

Well I had mine hidden in the arm of my chair like inside of it. But I mean I don't think my mom actually looks for porn in my room. Moms that look for kids porn and then confiscate it are horrible and messed up, also if they confront the kid thats even worse because not only do they take away thier kids sexual outlet they embarrase the hell out of kids. Also it is totally possible to piss with an erection although if your pissing into a toliet it is hard as hell to get it in accuratly.

That's one reason why there is internet porn..

My mother and I once caught my dad looking at "College girls in action" and we just laughed our asses off at him. The only thing he said was, ok enough laughing lemme finish dl'ing this video.

the place i used to store my porn was right on top of my shelf. I didnt care who saw it, i was a teen. Its expected of you to have at least one article of porn in your room.

But now i have none cause i burnt them all to hell :9

hmmm there could be the time that me and a friend ran up a 300 dollar additon to our phone bill and we only knew this after my mom recived a 300 dollar bill from madigascar.

another one is a few nights ago she was looking through my old 6th grade folder and some playboy pictures had fallen out into it years ago so shes looking through it finds these walks in and is like at least there not naked guys and walks off.

I think i got it the worst. I was surfin online, and it said free movies. Being 13 and horny, I clicked it.then it started to download something and i x'ed out, so it wouldnt be on my comp. 2 weeks later my mom gets a 19 dollar bill for porno.



bad times

lol? maybe ROFL would be more appropriate.

quote:Originally posted by I_Like_Traffic_Lights:

Wow you sure did laugh out loud a great deal. Are you ok?



Hah. That was good. I actually chuckled out loud.

My mother has found porn on the computer a few times; she doesn't really care and tells me not to save it where she can see it.

My mom caught me twice facing the comp jerken it, she never saw my equipment and she like barged into my room and screamed when she saw the porn and im like im taking a shower and she is like "ya a cold one your gonna need it". ya that was pretty embarassing but it is all good now

Ha I have never been caught with porn just victoria secert things when I was 10 or 11. I don't look at it on the computer much anymore cause damn spyware kept getting downloaded to my computer and I didn't want my parents to come across it in some secret folder some day.

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

its possible but real difficult. you have to sit down and push it down



Dude, you are fucked up, or maybe I am. But the point is that every morning I wake with the morning wood and go take a piss, I dont have to sit down a push I just piss normal, but my erection goes away when I'm done pissin'.

quote:Originally posted by J-Beth:

Dude, you are fucked up, or maybe I am. But the point is that every morning I wake with the morning wood and go take a piss, I dont have to sit down a push I just piss normal, but my erection goes away when I'm done pissin'.



Yeah. I'm the same way.

dad found a topless picture on the computer...

of me.

quote:Originally posted by river_of_ash:

I'm quite sure it's impossible to pee while you have an erection. Also, I agree with that other guy. You are a fucking dipshit!

No.

My friends mom gave me a movie entitled "clitties and titties".

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

its possible but real difficult. you have to sit down and push it down



Or just stand, aim high, and piss in the shower.

Mines all over my closet.

The videos are stacked by my tv.

I could give a fuck less.

When I was younger I got kicked off of AOL for running porn sites.

When my mom went to call to find out why the account was cancelled she found out I was running a porn site.

All she asked in a joking manner was if they were naked women. It was for the better because AOL fucking sucks and now I have a real internet connection.

i was lying on my mates bed reading a porn mag, i wasnt actually jerking off, and his mum walked in and i just kept reading saying ''its not mine''.lol.yea.

I borrowed a porn video from my mate the once, and my other mate didn't like the guy who i borrowed the video from, so he posted the porn video which was labeled "lesbain sluts" back through his front door, needless to say his mom found it and he was grounded for a loooong time

Long time ago I was looking at porn pics on my PC. Suddenly my dad walked in behind. When I noticed him I clicked the pic away but I guess it was too late since he was like "Hey, was there a naked girl? Bring it back on the screen, I wanna see it too!!"

quote:Originally posted by captain_kirk:

dad found a topless picture on the computer...

of me.

lmfao! pwnd....did he think u were a slut?

my stepdad works for some computer store thing so he knows all the ins and outs of the computer and I got caught once because I got sloppy and didn't clear the catch cookies temperary internet files, history and all that shit and got grounded for about a month but I got cought again after I knew I cleared the all that shit, does anyone know how he found out?

quote:Originally posted by tigerfly:

my stepdad works for some computer store thing so he knows all the ins and outs of the computer and I got caught once because I got sloppy and didn't clear the catch cookies temperary internet files, history and all that shit and got grounded for about a month but I got cought again after I knew I cleared the all that shit, does anyone know how he found out?

That has got to suck big time. I use ie for porn and firefox for everything else, that way i dont have to deal with history, cache, etc.

captain_kirk: can u plz post ur picture again so all the guys on totse can get off to it

You got grounded for looking at porn? Thats sad and messed up. Jerking off and shit is natural, if I found my kids looking at porn id say they are to young for that(depending on if they were way to young) and say "hey at least I know you arn't gay".

quote:Originally posted by Lord Kraligor:

Long time ago I was looking at porn pics on my PC. Suddenly my dad walked in behind. When I noticed him I clicked the pic away but I guess it was too late since he was like "Hey, was there a naked girl? Bring it back on the screen, I wanna see it too!!"

your dad is cool

Once I was laying nekkid on my bed whacking off with my headphones on and my eyes shut.

I blew and opened my eyes and noticed that my mum had come in while I was hard at it and put a drink and some chips next to my bed.

Yep.

Ricky Gervais is god.

quote:Originally posted by tigerfly:

ut a month but I got cought again after I knew I cleared the all that shit, does anyone know how he found out?

yeah he has installed a 'keylogger' or similar on the computer.

if you post on NS&H i'm sure someone can help..

quote:Originally posted by OCC-402:

Well there was this one time I was jerkin off on the family room couch not really paying attenion, half watching the TV at the same time ...with a full bladder. So I'm finnaly cumming after about 20min of watching TV, I lean back, close my eyes and ready a paper towel and as it's moving out I notice a it feels like a lot more than usual. I open my eyes and....I have just pissed all over the family room couch. I jump up scard as hell going "oh fuck, oh fuck" and after four hours of cleaning for 11:00pm to 3:00am, I cleaned that couch over and over. My parents never found out and later gave the couch to good wiil. But i'll tell ya it was interesting to see the family sit n' lay on that couch after that.

that made me laugh

it also made me think like the others u dipshit

quote:Originally posted by GordonFreemen:

That has got to suck big time. I use ie for porn and firefox for everything else, that way i dont have to deal with history, cache, etc.

It should definitely be the other way around. Firefox isn't as vulnerable to exploits and spyware and the like. Plus with Firefox its easier to erase your tracks. IE leaves all kinds of footprints in various places.

quote:Originally posted by EssJay:

I have no where to hide my pornos, my mum keeps finding them. Which sucks, 'cause then she hides them from me.

Where do you hide your pornos?

I wrap mine up inside a shirt inside my cupboard.

your mom goes and wanks off to them.

quote:Originally posted by Rez:

Once I was laying nekkid on my bed whacking off with my headphones on and my eyes shut.

I blew and opened my eyes and noticed that my mum had come in while I was hard at it and put a drink and some chips next to my bed.

PWN3D

quote:Originally posted by toast_and_bananas2002:

My friends mom gave me a movie entitled "clitties and titties".

did ya fuck her?

i hide my porn under the house (i have a panel i take outa the floor

i was jerking of and my sister walked in (i didnt fuck her so dont fucken ask)

also was haveing a biff and mum came home , kinda hard to hide the lump

quote:Originally posted by river_of_ash:

I'm quite sure it's impossible to pee while you have an erection. Also, I agree with that other guy. You are a fucking dipshit!

What about those morning boners? You can piss with those...and oh yeah those weird pornos with pissing...

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

yeah he has installed a 'keylogger' or similar on the computer.

if you post on NS&H i'm sure someone can help..



I see you've had this experience with your own, eh?

my mum caught me beating it once, right as i was blowing. she asked if it was good, and i said yes.



i keep it on CDs, and the tapes are near my tv, and the magazines are all over my floor

My father used to give me his playboys that he got by mail. I used to look at them, but didn't DO anything with them.

So I don't think my parents would care if I had pornos laying around, especially since I don't live at home anymore.

my mom borrowed her friends VCR. i had this REALLY weird feeling when i was hooking it up, and sure enough- there was a porn inside.

so my mom is on the phone, and when shes chit chatting on the phone, i could ask her for some crack and hookers and she wouldn''t hear me.



my and my odler sister (22 then, i think) put the VCR on and they've got these like 35 y/o women with big ole hairy bushes fucking and muffdiving. me and my sister turn up the volume and go sit in the other room to wait for my mom to get off the phone.

she comes back inside the house, looks at the tv and is like "what in the hell is this?!"

she calls her friend about the VCR, and she says she borrowed it from her son. i smell bullshit.

it was fucking halarious though.