Hey,

I've got a bit of a problem, and no, I'm not looking for a pick-up line or a "How do I pick up any chick with a line" kinda shit. I think that if I could get introduced to a girl, that I could pretty much take it from there, but my problem is that I see girls I think are cute all the time, and don't know what to say. Even if there is a girl from one of my classes, I don't know what to say to 'em. I get all tongue tied, any advice?

Just go up to them and be like

"Hey I'm (insert name here)"

if they dont respond just say somthing like

"Well aren't you going to tell me your name"

wait untill you can say something funny, then go from there.

Some people have social skills, some don't.

When I'm talking to a stranger it just comes natural. You shouldn't feel pressured to say something. I usually comment on something that's happening around us. That way, it's a neutral subject that you both have in common.

For instance, last weekend I was walking into someone's house for the first time. I didn't know anyone there except for the person I came with. There were four guys playing Spades so I sat down, introduced myself, and started talking about Spades which lead to cards which lead to gambling and the conversation went from there.

Your name should NEVER be the meat of your discussion. Introductions aren't alway appropriate either. I have a rule that I only introduce myself when I'm shaking someone's hand. (That goes for business situations or if your meeting a friend of a friend.) Think about it, if you're at a party and someone does something stupid you just make a comment, you don't say your name and THEN make the comment. Maybe that's a stupid example but whatever. I often find myself talking to someone for a period of time and finally asking their name or saying, "By the way..."

Also, when you are meeting someone. Shake their hand FIRMLY. Even if it is a girl. I don't know if you guys have weak hand shakes or are just afraid of hurting me but my hand isn't going to break from a firm handshake, dammit. The only guys that can get away with doing the kissy cheek thing are dudes I'm close to or knew from childhood/school. Don't do it to every girl you just meet, it's too personal. I find older men don't do this, it's just the younger ones. Why? Is this a generation X thing?

I find it extremely easy to spark up a conversation with someone in line at the grocery store but some people can't. I guess it's just one of those "things". Confidence and general knowledge in a wide array of subjects would be a good start to being a friendly stranger.

quote:Also, when you are meeting someone. Shake their hand FIRMLY. Even if it is a girl. I don't know if you guys have weak hand shakes or are just afraid of hurting me but my hand isn't going to break from a firm handshake, dammit. The only guys that can get away with doing the kissy cheek thing are dudes I'm close to or knew from childhood/school. Don't do it to every girl you just meet, it's too personal. I find older men don't do this, it's just the younger ones. Why? Is this a generation X thing?

Well, being a "younger man" I know what your talking about, and I dont do that to every girl I come encounter with, only the ones I find attractive, sorry for the subject change but I had to put my two cents into that one.

quote:Your name should NEVER be the meat of your discussion

If your just walking down the street and you see someone, let's say there is nothing really going on around, and commenting on the weather is not going to cut it, what should the poor guy say?

quote:Think about it, if you're at a party and someone does something stupid you just make a comment, you don't say your name and THEN make the comment. Maybe that's a stupid example but whatever.

That makes quite a bit of sense, in that situation I agree with you, but as mentioned above, what could be done in that situation?

I used to have that problem...I couldn't initiate a conversation with anyone...Now I work in a hotel as concierge!

The trick to it is learning to be comfortable with starting conversations with anyone...Male or female.

I started out a while ago by just talking to guys in pubs...Becoming comfortable with talking to strangers and making a good conversation out of it.

With women you just have to be able to do the same thing...Don't go in hoping to get a number or a date...Go in hoping to get a conversation.

That's where the key lies...Once you have a conversation going, you can work on directing it to your needs.

For example, just go up and say something like "I've never seen such a hideous pair of shoes" then point at someone, giggle and introduce yourself.

She'll be a little wary at first but just talk to her as though you're being friendly and she'll open up a little more.

Good luck mate.

dude u want to meet up chicks, CONFIDENCE!

thats all im going to say.

grow an accent. works for me :P

but seriously comment on something in the environment but make sure its pertintent. for example, (this is a stupid situation but it was the first i thought of to get the point across bear with me) if you were at the park and the girl is flying a kite then it would be apprioate to make a comment on the weather. where as it wudnt be in other situations. if shes walking a dog say thats a nice dog etc not hey i have a hamster, you free friday?

also offer to help with whatever shes doing. but not in a "im a macho man and youre helpless" way

if you really get desperate carry around a pen or something and say hey did you drop this? (dont use on same girl twice! lol)

So basically just be sweet, charming, and myself?

Damn straight. Unless by being "yourself" means being a psychopathic nut...

quote:if you really get desperate carry around a pen or something and say hey did you drop this? (dont use on same girl twice! lol)

I've seen it happen, although it may be humorous, it is most definatly a shot in the foot.

Be like "He he, Hey Baby. He he eh. So like, you wanna do it or something.. He he."