So here I am, alone on a Monday night. It's 11, a bit too late to really do anything useful... what to do, what to do.

Awhile back my ex signed up on a dating site. Before then I had always considered dating sites to be for the middle-aged, the pathetic, the unattractive, the losers... my ex is none of these. It piqued my interests, not enough to sign up though... fuck-off, I'll get my men the old-fashioned way, thanks!

But tonight, born of sheer boredom, I did it... I created a fake profile. Really all I wanted to do was see what the fuss was all about, why SO many people are joining these things these days! I figured I'd check back sometime this week and see if my profile had gotten any messages... well, I just went in to edit something on the profile, and to my shock, a message had already arrived!

... this has wierded me out. I did create a fake profile, but the thing is, I didn't spice things up, I didn't even post a sexy picture of some random model chick... in fact I was brutally honest. I described myself as a "bit of a train wreck" and used the words "slightly damaged goods"... hell, I even admitted to being a single mum of a 1-month-old son... some guy is still so desperate that he replies to someone like that? What... the... fuck.

So, I take a look at his profile, figuring there must be something horribly wrong with this guy, maybe a deformed face? Nope, nothing wrong, seems pretty average to me! This is where it gets really wierd, I shrug and return to my profile's inbox... in the space of 23 minutes there are now 9 messages from 9 different guys...

Umm, is there a shortage of single women that I am unaware of?

quote:Originally posted by Sarc*:

Umm, is there a shortage of single women that I am unaware of?

Probably, but I think most women wouldn't be too interested in online dating.

Anyway, just out of curiosity, what site was this, and what was the name of your profile?

http://www.nzdating.com/members/profile.aspx?l=Kriskiss

I did the same thing too, except I'm a guy. But I started to wonder what kind of people actually do those kinds of sites. Anyways, I started going through random member pics for my state and saw someone I knew! I just started laughing. I also saw someone I didn't know, but they were wearing a hoody for our town's football team. I also think I saw someone else from my town, but I can't be sure, could of been a look-a-like.

So I made this fakey profile to see who sends me messages, but unlike your success with desperate males the female equivalent isn't. Haven't gotten one message yet. Though it would probably help if I put up a pic, I'm just really not interested in meeting anyone over the net. That just says something about a person.

-Grey

I think that maybe because you said that you didn't want a relationship and were only looking for someone to talk to would have been more appealing to guys. I think I would be more inclined to talk to someone like you if you had said you only wanted someone to talk to rather than someone to have a relationship with.

But what would I know? I'm Aussie.

I've always been inclined to ponder the same thing when I'd get those "fuck off, she's mine" mad-dog looks from the pieces of shit my mother has been bringing home ever since I was 9, and long after I ceased to be in her custody at 12 or 13 (I forget; all fragments of memory now). The reason for this is because my mother was, is, and ever shall be a very hideous, wrinkled, toxic-blonde dyejobbed burnout of a female entity the likes of which I wouldn't fuck for billions of dollars, ownership of mars, Opium poppy field, or even all three. And I'm referring to the same flaws found in someone else. Stands to reason I'd be even less-inclined if it were my mo...egh. I need to go fucking retch now.

And I should note that I'm half-inclined to wonder if you're waiting for someone to say "Home alone? Masturbate!" or "OMG let me come ovoer LOLOL". Notice how even mentioning this shows that I either read too much into things, have some perceptory and intellectual skill, or that I'm secretly imagining the whole masturbation thing right now.

I love psychology. And no, the lattermost isn't true of me. Well, it wasn't.

That is a little suprising to say the least, I always knew my fellow men were desperate, but that's plain depressing. How many of the replies wanted a relationship and how many just wanted to talk?

How would it be then that I know enough girls that are very desperate? Perhaps the majority of both sexes either wants more then they give from a relationship or all the normal people are in relationships?

But then I also suffer from the same disease as Elf, I'm Aussie.

Like parking spaces: Good ones taken, rest are handicapped.

Just for the hell of it, I signed up to that dating service. Thing is, I live in Texas(All things are bigger in Texas...hur-hur-hur). If anyone wants to check out my profile it's under the same handle I use here on totse.

quote:Originally posted by Sarc*:

Umm, is there a shortage of single women that I am unaware of?

Not at all. In fact, by all accounts, there should be a shortage of single men overall.

All that there's a shortage of is women who will give guys the chance they're asking for. The world is replete with women who'll say, "No, thanks."

And this is why men look so desperate -- we're considerably less picky than women overall.

quote:Originally posted by Shiantar:

And this is why men look so desperate -- we're considerably less picky than women overall.

Heh, most women would claim it's the other way around.

Something about all this reminds me of Groucho Marx's famous quote "I wouldn't join an exclusive club that would have me as a member". Self-effacing has spiraled down into self-deprecating.

Nobody's perfect, and a lot of people just aren't in that "happy average" that can manage to summon some social skills without overthinking things and sabotaging themselves.

Think about it. When you venture out into the social arena, you're exposing yourself to a very limited social milieu. The odds of meeting someone unique and interesting is slim.

Dating services aren't anything new; in the 70s-early 90s, it was all done in independent newspaper classifieds. Before that, the "personals" section of the major newpaper classifieds and through matchmaking services (which still exist). Before that, it was mostly done through busy-body females who always knew someone who had a son/daughter/nephew/cousin/niece that was "perfect for you". Matchmaking is really the "old fashioned way".

Anyways, try not to be so amazed if you find someone through non-mediated means. A lot of people would do well to adjust their attitudes and not be so judgemental.