I need some advice on how to turn down a girl. Unfortunately, a simple: "No, I'm not interested in you in that way", doesn't seem to convey my message. I have repeatedly told her this but it does not deter her at all.

I need to make her realise I'm not interested and never will be, but also try to spare her feelings.

There isn't a way that you can "let her down gently", the simple truth of the matter is that it's gonna hurt no matter HOW you let her. If you two are friends, the best thing to do is to invite her over, sit her down, and tell her "Hey, I'm not interested in you like that, and I wanna be friends with you, but if you keep persuing me, then I'm gonna find it difficult to be friends with you." It all really depends on HOW MUCH she likes you.

quote:Originally posted by Discipulus:

It all really depends on HOW MUCH she likes you.

Therein lies the problem, she thinks it is "love", I am her friend and I don't want to hurt her. However, I have to do something as she has publicly tried to force herself onto me more than once.

quote:Originally posted by deserted dream:

However, I have to do something as she has publicly tried to force herself onto me more than once.

That's awful - she should be caged/restrained A.S.A.P.

I imagine this crazy girl walking up to you and masturbating herself on your leg. It's quite disturbing.

Some people will say it's wrong to hit women, but violence can be the answer to some problems. If reasoning doesn't work, resort to violence...smack her, shove her away...do something physical. You can always apologize if you feel bad about doing it.

quote:Originally posted by soul_assassin_girl:

That's awful - she should be caged/restrained A.S.A.P.

I imagine this crazy girl walking up to you and masturbating herself on your leg. It's quite disturbing.

Haha, that'd be a sight to behold.

though friends, you should become somewhat till a lot less friendly to her and in no time it will wear off, be carefull though, becoming to rude will ruin your friendship

Thanks for the help. I think I'll do what Discipulus said and if that doesn't work, it may be time to end our friendship.

quote:Originally posted by soul_assassin_girl:

That's awful - she should be caged/restrained A.S.A.P.

I imagine this crazy girl walking up to you and masturbating herself on your leg. It's quite disturbing.

Yeah, I wish I had the problems most of S&A had...

"I'm too big!" "Girls love me too much!" "I'm full of bullshit"... Well, not the last one. That's where the "most" comes into play.

Anyways, though, just tell her you're gay, and you've got a boyfriend. That should work.

good luck, there is always some insane plan stiring in their minds when ever you hurt them, as a matter of fact i had a chick threaten to kill me, she made plans and shit but i knew it would never happen, could thing shes over that crush.

hmm....from the OTHER side...



your situation sounds a lot like mine, except i'm the one with the crush and he's the one who's not interested. i havent forced myself on him [in public or otherwise], though.

so what i can tell you to get her over you is this: MAKE SURE you arent "crypic", don't lead her on even a LITTLE, don't make sexual jokes with her. she'll think you mean more than you do, and she'll get false hope. don't hang out with her alone, if you hug her give her a "thug hug" [one armed], and don't EVER let her flirt with you if you can stop it. talk to her about other girls you're dating or doin stuff with. other people might say, "oh, thatll just hurt her," but let me tell you something:

She wants to get over you.

I want to get over my guy so badly, i'd give anything. its too painful to like him and not be liked back. it may sound mean, but you're helping her.



the WORST thing my guy friend ever did to me, the meanest, cruelest thing, was evade the question and give me false hope.

So she's a friend and she thinks it's love. How can it be love? It's infatuation, and she's putting you in the awkward position of being the object of her infatuation.

If you want to discuss this with her and possibly stay friends, focus on her issues, not the relationship issues, because there is no relationship. Even though you want to make it clear that there's no relationship nor any hope of there being one, focusing on the very subject gives life and energy to the possibility. Nutty chicks will cling to anything.

Instead, ask her why she thinks she feels the way she does. Set your ego aside when she says flattering things. Remind her that romantic interest is contingent upon mutual feelings, and without the feelings coming from you, what is she basing her feelings on? Tell her she's infatuated, and that she's idealizing you. Let her know you're not comfortable being in this position. Explain that it feels as inappropriate as if one of your male friends expressed romantic interest in you. Assure her that you'll still be a friend if she still wants to be, after giving her time to think things over.