I've noticed this sort of mentality over the years of my life living with my parents.

And yes, it did ruin their marriage.

I'm really confused over this one...

Someone please explain to me how can something like this devolop and work in a person's mind.

I'm not exactly sure how the victim mentality was manifest in your parent's marriage, but I'll offer my take on it.

The root of that mentality is lack of self-responsibility and lack of self-awareness. People who think they're "victims" have an inappropriate sense of entitlement; the world owes them a living. Thus, when things go wrong in their lives, they look for others to blame. If they can't easily find the blame logically, they'll assign blame. And then we get threads like this one:

http://www.totse.com/bbs/Forum4/HTML/008823.html

Anyways, victims are dangerous people. They think it's within their rights to fuck anyone over at any time, because nothing is their fault.

Aren't you the one who posted about money management? If you wanted to play victim, you would have bellowed about the injustices of the consumer society and how labor gets screwed over with puny wages. But you didn't.

yes I am the one who's posted about money management.



This is something I just noticed with myself and with alot of the people I talk to, including the girls I talk to and date.

So I've asked.

[This message has been edited by FourUntoFive (edited 07-21-2004).]

Nobody owes jack shit to anybody else. The only person that can make or break a life is the one living it. People who are always the victim are adult babies.

That's just my take on victimhood.

Edit: There's also the Martyr's Complex, a very specific form of victimhood...let me explain quickly-

You do a lot of good shit for people out of the kindness of your heart (atleast that's what you tell yourself...psychological studies reveal it's usually to mask depression). After a long while you start to think they owe you for it and the underlying depression turns to a cold hatred of anyone who needs charity to sustain life.

[This message has been edited by Optimus Prime (edited 07-21-2004).]