I noticed something today. I like to be treated like shit. Not like total shit, but I need to feel like the other person is better than me; like they're doing me some great service by letting me hang out with them. I think it's like a security thing. I need the person to remind me that I've made the right choice in being with them. I need to feel like I've done well in getting this person who is so much greater than me. And to keep this feeling, I need the person to kind of cut down my self-esteem a little.

So this could be the reason girls choose the asshole guy. Security. ...is this something everyone else knows and I'm just thinking it's an epiphany? Well, who cares? I'm just trying to help you all

I used to be the same way, actually. But then... I dunno. I guess I grew up. There are a lot of times that I think my husband is better than me, but he NEVER treats me badly. The man doesn't know how to be an asshole. Not really.

I think most, if not all, women go through that phase, and most of us eventually get tired of being treated like shit, and move on. But there are a few who remain in that phase. And I feel sorry for them.

Have more respect for yourself than to feel the need to be treated like shit. I mean, c'mon. Can you imagine being 80 and having your significant other tell you how he's doing you a favor by staying with you? Hopefully you'll laugh, then beat him with your cane.

But I digress. Don't worry. It should pass.



[This message has been edited by Lilly (edited 07-10-2004).]

I wouldn't be worried if I were you. Just remember that everyone has somthing to learn from you or admire about you.

-Week

Young females have that problem, they either grow out of it, or... Um... No.

About time you woke up to yourself Glitter. You are looking into this waaaaay too much and you just need to keep things simple. I know that this is easier said then done but just give it time and you will be able to make it. You have been caught up in an emtional rut and to get out, it will take time and patience but the end result will be much more rewarding than if you stay in that rut and continue to get too caught up in things.

[This message has been edited by elf (edited 07-10-2004).]

Some people have a harder time growing up than others. Although we're born equal, we don't live and mature equally.

I believe the hardships and bullshit you face now will ultimately help you in the end. There are lessons that we all have to learn, especially social issues. Growing up in the western world, you'll forever be around people smarter, richer, this and that. While one person's goal may be to become better, be promoted, receive awards, I think the ultimate peace would be to accept yourself, as you are. That may sound really fucking cheesy but it's true! Once you accept and become content with your place in the world, you've got it made.

You may feel that there is this giant wall, blocking you from change but when you least expect it, you'll get over it and you won't even notice it. That's the great thing about growing up, it's painless.. well sort of.. You can't force it, it just happens. In 10 years, you'll look back and think, "Damn, when did that happen?". You'll be amazed how much you develop and how little you notice it.

About your self-esteem, I've had that same state of mind. "When I was your age" I was an emotional rollercoaster, finding all my faults, dwelling on them and not being able to change them because of a lack of knowing how to change. Don't worry about it and don't worry about putting a name to all your faults. No fuck that, know your weaknesses just don't dwell on it. (Easily said, right?) Everyone has their shortcomings, just take it one day at a time. Trying to change something like confidence may seem overwhelming but baby steps eventually add up.

I guess the point of this was to tell you that you're not the only one, which I'm sure you already know. And basically, you'll grow out of it. (Ugh, I hated when people told me that, too). If they try to put you on meds, tell them to fuck off because they tried to give me perscriptions left and right and I told them to fuck off (they were SSRIs, wtf am I going to do with a drug with 0(Zero) recreational value?).

Anyway, you've got too much of an attitude to be too down. There's an extent of low self-esteem for anyone with that much spice.

Baby steps... unless you're like me and are too lazy to change it. Then just wait it out and try to ignore it, hopefully it'll go away. That's the great thing about teen problems, they tend to just dissipate over time. Argh, this entire post I was really trying to avoid the undermining factor but I see so much of myself in you, it's hard to not point out where I fucked up.

Read between the lines, you'll get it.

I think it comes from the need to feel accepted. Everyone feels this way at some point, some people just hang on to it more.

The problem comes when the need to feel accepted starts to become your reason for shrugging off things that you shouldn't let pass. Know when the line has been crossed and confront it.

Nokio

While normally I would be peeved as hell at being told that I'll grow out of it, this thought actually comforts me today. For today is my 15th birthday and I've been dreading it. I hate getting older. But if it means that I might be less of a shithead in the future, bring on the years.

To clarify my situation, I like things so that the relationship is volatile. That might be part of it. I like to be treated like shit, then get mad about it, then the other person get mad about it, get in big fight, then make up. I did this with my best friend for a couple years, I did this with a chick I was super into earlier this year. Another thing the chick did/does is always let me know that I like her more than she likes me. Like writing something really sweet in my yearbook, then telling me that she wrote something really sweet in everybody's yearbook. She said it in such a way that it didn't sound like she was trying to undo what she had written, but that was what she was doing... what a bitch. ...I'm ranting to myself. ...anyway, happy birthday to me.

edit: spelling

[This message has been edited by GlitterPunk112358 (edited 07-10-2004).]

No... What it boils down to is that you have low self-esteem and are probably insecure. Thats why you think you like to be treated like shit. One day you'll mature and you'll overcome most of your deep-rooted emotional issues.

EDIT: That IS why girls date guys in highschool that treat them like shit. You'll be suprised to know, that this mostly ends after high school. It dosen't end with every girl, but a lot. People grow up.

[This message has been edited by Mr. Self Destruct (edited 07-10-2004).]

I hate you glitter punk. It's girls like you that ignore honest, sincere, nice, kind, loving people like me and go to bed with some fucking drug dealer that has syphillis. I know a couple of million of girls that are like you, exactly like you ,and I want all of you to die

quote:Originally posted by VladimirIllyichLenin:

I hate you glitter punk. It's girls like you that ignore honest, sincere, nice, kind, loving people like me and go to bed with some fucking drug dealer that has syphillis. I know a couple of million of girls that are like you, exactly like you ,and I want all of you to die

I'm with you. FUCK YOU GLITTERPUNK.

quote:Originally posted by elf:

I'm with you. FUCK YOU GLITTERPUNK.

Perhaps you didn't get the point of this topic? Meh, oh well I guess screaming at screamers won't help.

It's not uncommon for people of all ages to date attracive people that they don't really like. Why? So that they are in a relationship but one that won't last, since they're with the wrong person.

Then again, people have trouble everyday. It's scary waiting & thinking * What if bad stuff happens to me? * Sometimes it's *easier* to make your own problems, than to keep waiting.

Thrills? Adrenaline is the original high. The

Original Upper. Love/Meth/Trouble/Sex/Sports & a million other things are excting & *fun*

rushes...who can turn them down?

If not one then another or ten others.

It's so hard to choose better 'cause bad ones

are easier rushes. No?

happy birthday glitter...

and yes, its a good theory about chicks want to feel like its an honor to be with the dude, makes sense...but its not the best, even though it happens...

and to the people that were tellin off glitter and shit, shut up guys...she realised a lesson of life, you should congratulate her, look at it like, one less bitchy cunt like that...

quote:Originally posted by VladimirIllyichLenin:

I hate you glitter punk. It's girls like you that ignore honest, sincere, nice, kind, loving people like me and go to bed with some fucking drug dealer that has syphillis. I know a couple of million of girls that are like you, exactly like you ,and I want all of you to die

Once again I'm left supporting Vlad. Nice post again Vlad. You read my mind too much.

But yeah glitter thats pretty sad. If you don't like how you live, change it. If you like being treated badly a little, then live like that. Nobody needs to care, nor should they, about your life choices. We can only hold our personal opinions about it, in which most will probably think that this is a stupid thing to be doing.

quote:Originally posted by GlitterPunk112358:

While normally I would be peeved as hell at being told that I'll grow out of it, this thought actually comforts me today. For today is my 15th birthday and I've been dreading it. I hate getting older. But if it means that I might be less of a shithead in the future, bring on the years.



That's precious. "I hate getting older".

If you're anything like me, and from your posts you may be, you'll look back on your teen years with a certain fondness yet it will make you cringe at the same time.

quote:Originally posted by deadlycindy:

If you're anything like me, and from your posts you may be, you'll look back on your teen years with a certain fondness yet it will make you cringe at the same time.

Wow, I've got that already! I think I'm aging in a geometric fashion...

You are so lucky i replied to your message you peice of shit. I am so much better than you. I'm doing you a great service by typing this. Just Kiddding .

It's perfectly normal most people grow out of it by age 16.

This is fairly irrelevent in the sense that I'm not really helping Glitter, but I'd like to point out that you are all acting as if all girls go through this phase. I'm not saying that a lot don't, I'm just saying that not all do. When people make blanket statements like "that's why girls date assholes in high school" it really irritates me. Some girls will date assholes, some girls will be stuck up and make guys bow down to them and worship them, and some girls will be perfectly balanced and have normal relationships with their friends and boyfriends. All of these are normal, although we all dread the "I'm A Goddess" girls.

quote:Originally posted by stephanina:

This is fairly irrelevent in the sense that I'm not really helping Glitter, but I'd like to point out that you are all acting as if all girls go through this phase. I'm not saying that a lot don't, I'm just saying that not all do. When people make blanket statements like "that's why girls date assholes in high school" it really irritates me. Some girls will date assholes, some girls will be stuck up and make guys bow down to them and worship them, and some girls will be perfectly balanced and have normal relationships with their friends and boyfriends. All of these are normal, although we all dread the "I'm A Goddess" girls.

While it's not true that all girls go through this phase, many do. And a lot of guys here piss and moan about how chicks don't like the nice guys. I'm offering insight into why these chicks might not like them.

On a somewhat unrelated note, I know I don't know a lot about your love life so you can tell me to shut the hell up whenever you want to, but didn't someone who you now care about treat you kind of shittily in the past? Did he not once make you feel worthless? It could be that I'm misunderstanding what you told me at the time, but I think I remember you saying that he was an asshole to you (note that I'm not saying this guy is an asshole. I'm quite fond of him). I was under the impression that the two of you used to fight quite a bit and had some serious issues in the field of self-worth and all that goodness...

Yes Glitter, you're quite right about that. In a way I did like to be treated like shit, but as you also know, the situation between me and him has changed a lot in the past six months or so. He no longer treats me like shit at all, and I'm really happy with that. Sometimes we make each other feel crappy, but everyone does that.

Hey, I just had an idea. I'm compeletely submissive. I wonder if most girls who like to be fucked around with are submissive? Maybe if you had lots of sub-dom sex you'd feel better normally, and not need to be pushed around outside of fucking.

quote:Originally posted by stephanina:

Maybe if you had lots of sub-dom sex you'd feel better normally, and not need to be pushed around outside of fucking.

I have thought about that. I'm definitely a sub, but I'm often forced into a more dominant role. I'm something of a control freak, so I have to take charge sometimes even though I don't like to. Kind of hard to explain. I want to be dominated, but I want it to be done right (or my way is more accurate, I suppose)

It's good to hear that you guys are doing well now. But you see my point about how even if there are girls who don't go through that phase (liking to be treated like shit), it seems that you did. Anyway, good to know that he treats you well now. He's a cool cat. Give him my best, if you will

Alright, this is getting a little ridiculous, I hate posting to communicate with one person, but I have no other means of communication with you. I was wondering if you're coming over here this summer? Email me if you want, or not, your choice. I still have the same email, if you kept it. I also acknowledge that I went through this stage, I never denied it, I was just pointing out the lots of people don't.

quote:Originally posted by Gustave:

Wow, I've got that already! I think I'm aging in a geometric fashion...

Gus, I thought you were the alpha and the omega, the beginning and the end, etc. etc.?

Now then, where were we.

I don't get low self esteem or depression (in that I never suffer from it and I don't understand it), so my two cents are irrelevant (although they would probably be pretty mean [I have little mercy for people with depression and self-esteem issues]). You're 15, glitter. Nobody's happy when they're 15. Well I was but that's because I am infallible.

You'll get over it. Either that or you'll begin your descent into a slow downward spiral of destructive activities, abusive relationships, culminating in your death, either from a drug overdose or murder, on a cold street in some unknown ghetto of an irrelevant city, cold, alone, and forgotten.

But hey maybe you'll be ok.

quote:Originally posted by GlitterPunk112358:

I have thought about that. I'm definitely a sub, but I'm often forced into a more dominant role. I'm something of a control freak, so I have to take charge sometimes even though I don't like to. Kind of hard to explain. I want to be dominated, but I want it to be done right (or my way is more accurate, I suppose)...

You should talk to <---- this guy .

I looove playing the dom. Fun, fun, power, sex, fun. I have some of the necessary equipment too :P.



As for your problem, you're a teenger. Your brain is bound to go haywire every now and then. Just realize it, accept it, and more on with you life.

P.S. I'm stoned.

So? I'm a stereotypical rocker, speed-freak, horn-dog, hopeless romantic, asshole, nice guy, narcissist, ladie's man, chauvanist, South American revolutionary, nerd, video gamer, right-wing gun-loving militant survivalist NRA member, libertarian, idealogue, oral sex-loving(giving, to wimmens, you yutz..Not you, Glitoris [term of endearment - you know I like you]}, convoluted, contradictory, paradoxical, weird son of a bitch, and you don't see me giving a god damn as to the why's of it all.

My point? Harness your gift and use it to your advantage. It can always be done.

...Or, when life gives you lemonade, wing 'em right back and add a few of your own, like I would; works too.

-Infrared