like i guess most men by b/f always seems to have an erection upon waking.

yet why is this 'morning glory' bigger and harder than a 'normal' erection ? are his dreams that erotic?

did ask him but just got a 'dunno'!

I'm just shooting in the dark here, but here are two possibilities (even though you're kind of a troll):

1. When you wake up, that's your first erection of the day. It's kind of equitable to stretching in the morning - you can stretch farther then than in the evening.

2. When you're sleeping, you don't keep yourself "under control". So that is a slightly more air-headed theory - scruples.

its just from being relaxed and having the blood running completely freely through your body. and it isnt any bigger or harder for most guys.

quote:Dear Couch,

Why do most men awake in the morning with a hard-on?

Signed,

sex ed teacher

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Teach,

Well, the reason is that most men have several erections during a normal nights sleep, for as long as two hours at a time. No offense teach, but if you're a sex-ed instructor and weren't aware of this then we'll be looking for your knocked up students on the next Springer show!

Often referred to as ' morning wood' , the more formal term is nocturnal tumescence and seems to correspond with REM periods of sleep. The question of why is often claimed to be urine retention. Most guys know the frustration of waking up with a stiffy and having to pee like crazy, and although not impossible to urinate with a hard on, there's nothing more amusing than watching a guy trying to lean as far forward as possible to get that thing aimed somewhere near the bowl. Given a few experiences like that and it's easy to see why most guys would come to this erroneous conclusion. However, a more likely cause, or need, for nighttime stiffys seems to be oxygen. According to a well decorated sex research psychologist, Al Cooper, ' The penis lives in a low oxygen state. Nature takes care of this by making sure the penis gets enough oxygenated blood through erections.' This is not a 'written in stone' theory since the argument could be made that there are more erections at night because oxygen assists with the erectile chemical processes and oxygen levels are higher during sleep. So there's a bit of the 'chicken or the egg problem' here.

This does lead us to the topic of horniness. We should remind ourselves here that waking up with a hard-on does not equate to waking up in a love making mood. So women should not feel unwanted when their man limps to the bathroom, spends five minutes or so waiting for that thing to come down enough to pee, then proceeds to check his email. At the same time, we should remind the fellas that you're not going to wake up every morning with an erection. If you're worried that you may not be having nocturnal tumescence, then buy some stamps. Stamps!?!? Yup! It's the old stamp test. Just take enough stamps, like from a roll, to secure snugly around the shaft of your flaccid wee-wee before you go to bed. Wear some shorts or undies to protect the postage, and in the morning, see if the paper is torn at the perforation. If you wake up still ready for mailing, do it a few more nights. If you're still not busting paper, head to the urologist.

there is no such thing as a stupid question...unless of course it's YOU whos asking.

yeah i love you too sidewayz thanks for the answers people. i know its a dumb question but hell how's a girl too learn?

Sweet hen, you must love chicken or egg quest

ions. So, have you noticed that your Hoo-hoo does the girl version of the *Mornin' Glory*?

Because it most probably does.

All night long, for both genders, REM sleep &

their naughty, naughty Penis & Twatty bits are in a synchronious dance. All the politics

& such of any relationship are all gone in sleep. The higher functions often do

weird things to ones sexuality, in sleep the brain & body are able to do what comes natural.

hoo-hoo??? that's a new one on me. don't think the lord blessed me with one of those.

Dear hen, it's just a polite euphemism for Hairy-Clam-Snapper.

why not just say 'cunt'?

henteichicken, you are a TROLL. go to your cave.

oh dear did i use a naughty word? sorry if that offended your delicate well bred ears !(don't trolls live under bridges?)

quote:Originally posted by henteichicken:

don't trolls live under bridges?)

idiots! they live in giant hollowed out trees!

Well, it IS kind of trollish to avoid a serious answer & reply by using a vulgarity

Saying you're a grown-up while acting the child.

quote:Originally posted by Shodan's Own:

idiots! they live in giant hollowed out trees!

I thought that was owls...

or possibly wood peckers...

quote:Originally posted by moonmeister:

Well, it IS kind of trollish to avoid a serious answer & reply by using a vulgarity

Saying you're a grown-up while acting the child.

calling a cunt a 'hoo hoo' is adult??

ok serious answer -i don't really know. and most nights i put my egg in before i go to sleep so i usually wake up with an orgasm or at least very wet panties.

what the HELL did you just say??

something about an egg. wait you said you but it somewhere... how did you do that?why did you do that? do you have a webcam?

Well, this thread served it's purpose...

Eggs? *picks up "tally of henteichicken's blatant trolls" and adds another notch*

And I don't get morning wood. You'll probably say that makes me gay or something, but I'll have the last laugh when I can piss within 10 seconds of waking up without crouching over the toilet like a midget.

But, which came firsty, the chicken or the egg?

yep folks that's S&A- you give a serious answer and get accused of being a troll!

* raises glass to rico for restoring my faith in my fellow totsians*

Oh my god! All I do is keep a private little list and I get accused to being an example of all that is bad about totse!

* raises glass to henteichicken, then shoves it up her ass*

As it was explained to me by my husband's doctor, men get morning wood because during the night the bladder fills, and then proceeds to rub against the prostate. Thus causing an erection, or "morning wood."

HTH.

quote:Originally posted by henteichicken:



ok serious answer -i don't really know. and most nights i put my egg in before i go to sleep so i usually wake up with an orgasm or at least very wet panties.



what is your "egg"??just curiosu, dont have to answer!

thx

spicy

its an egg shaped vibrator.you leave it in the vagina and it hums away merrily to itself.it is a real awesome feeling

hi lilly -thats an interesting explanation and what does hth mean? (hope this helps?)



[This message has been edited by henteichicken (edited 06-02-2004).]

quote:Originally posted by Lilly:

As it was explained to me by my husband's doctor, men get morning wood because during the night the bladder fills, and then proceeds to rub against the prostate. Thus causing an erection, or "morning wood."

HTH.

Well...if Doc, would leave the drugs alone & get a good nights sleep once in a while, he'd

not talk so glib. Damn druggies in white.

Though there may be some truth, in what the DiW says. I can't be the only guy who has been really tired, fallen instantly asleep for 10 minutes & woken up hard. It has been thousands of times that this has happened.

I can't be the only one to wake up with an almost empty bladder & a *Mornin' Glory*. The

secret to that is, don't eat or drink anything, for a bunch of hours before sleep.

Hey, ask any nurse. Doctors suck.

quote:Originally posted by Lilly:

As it was explained to me by my husband's doctor, men get morning wood because during the night the bladder fills, and then proceeds to rub against the prostate. Thus causing an erection, or "morning wood."

HTH.

As an actual, sensible answer to the question, this deserves to be repeated.

quote:Originally posted by moonmeister:

Though there may be some truth, in what the DiW says. I can't be the only guy who has been really tired, fallen instantly asleep for 10 minutes & woken up hard. It has been thousands of times that this has happened.

I don't know about 10 minutes, but short durations of sleep are occupied with more dreaming (REM) time. Possibly you dreamt about sex - not a bad assumption to make. Of course, waking up mid-REM would probably mean you'd recall quite vivid dreams.

henteichicken, HTH means 'Hope this helps'

^^^Well,many times I've been in the pre-sleep

stage. Where I can feel the change in my internal programming from *Wakeful* to *Sleep

/Dreaming*, starting to kick in. But, before

the change is complete it aborts.

I find, that in this aborted, pre-sleep state

the memmories that would be lost before I wake, remain. These memms tell me that with the slide into sleep, pre-dreaming I am con-

currently becomming erect.

Many times I have retained the feeling of starting to become erect & losing that function, with the return to wakefullness. I

find that there is a definite pre-REM thing going on.

could this be turning into a sensible thread? thanx for the answers so far guys.

How the hell can you sleep with a vibrator up there?!

...and why?!

Chances are it is harder then because when you first wake your testosterone levels are at their highest. Just my assumption.

Well, she did mention orgasms & the

good wetness. Though, I have seen some questions in advice columns, from vibrator addicts, whose hoo-hoos had become much less sensitive to regular stimulation.

Generally the advice was: "Back away from the

vibrator, do not make any sudden moves, till you have recovered your sensitivity". I guess

it's kinda like using any hand-held tool that

vibrates. Nerves become numb.

Pleasure from any good thing, vibrating or not, makes one crave the new, some variety.

moonmeister i hope to god that's just you trying to wind me up....fuck i would hate to use any sensation down there.



and as to why i use it (and i will no doubt be called a troll again for saying this): my b/f is a very good lover but after he's come once or twice then its good night vienna.which is ok cos i know how hard he works etc.

but i'm still horny so i wank a bit and then put in my egg to round off.

Really, it's just like anything. I mean, as an example, people who move from what most people would think are better climates to the Northern hemisphere. From places that people who had snow every year of

their lives, would kill to live in, if they were assured of not being caught.

Maybe, take all those people who have good jobs/partners/homes, but fuck them up & end up moaning. People often are as numbed by good things as by incessant bad. No? The brain, apparently get *worn* by using the same neurons in the same old way. This is good & bad. No?

Do any sort of activity that involves an extended period of vibration... using powertools, riding a atv or dirtike, using a jackhammer.. When you stop, you feel a bit numbed.

When you start lifting weights, over time your muscles adapt to the new, continuous strain by getting bigger and such.. by the same token it would make sense to me that using a vibrating object frequently on such sensitive areas would over the course of time start to desensitize them.. even if only a little.

Did you know theres a condition called "Nintendonitis" its a repetitive strain injury caused from extremely long periods of playing video games, and nowadays its worse since most controllers offer a built in vibrate function.

Granted this is on the extreme end, I'm sure daily use would cause some type of change in the span of a lifetime.

^^^worrying.

quote:Originally posted by henteichicken:

^^^worrying.

What, do you think everyone is fucking with you or something? People get desensitized. Go to clitical.com for more info (I would give you a link to the page, but I don't care that much about you). The same thing happens with clit piercings and piercings that rub on the clit. But once you make the stimulation go away (stop with the egg, take out the piercing), you regain sensitivity.

hi glitter.no i don't think everyone is fucking with me , i just had never considered this as an issue, however as any loss of feeling appears to be temporary i'll quit worrying.thanx

Well, I don't know if it applies to mysterious alien vibrating eggs, but I think

construction workers sometimes sustain permanent damage. They use seriously vibin' machines though.

Some women become seriously enamored of their

little machines though. You're man may get a

touch disgruntled, if he finds you making wedding plans for you & * IT *.

well i think i'm very lucky that he allows me to use it

and what have my wank habits to do with morning wood?

Well, some dudes reading about you & your egg

will be * helped * to wake with a Good Wood..

or better...

Not me, I only fantasize about women that I've actually seen in the flesh. I don't

really * believe * in those I've only seen or

heard through mass media.

oh no you mean you i'm not the object of your dreams?

*heart broken*

well i guess i'll just have to throw myself at carbon b !

he's so manly and masterful

[This message has been edited by henteichicken (edited 06-03-2004).]

A mercy fuck, huh? Well, at least he won't die a voigin.

shouldn't that read 'a vogon'? or perhaps a 'vegan'?

I don't know about Vegan...he seems a li'l aggressive. But, Vogon, he will always

be.

I don't know if he wants an *egg in his beer*

he prolly needs an *egg* in 'is bum, though.

moonmeister, this is OT, but I gotta love your writing style. A mix of cryptic, crude and poetic.

And it's not a temporary loss. Use a vibrator for a long time (you gave the impression that you slept with the thing turned on) and you're gonna need bigger and bigger eggs crammed in your cunt to get the same pleasure. Until you need an egg so big that it will destroy the WORLD!!

Bwhahahahah!!

^^^yes i do sleep with it turned on-that's the point of it.

Goodness! Carumba! ...destroy the WORLD.

Something like that may not be used without an authorization from...the Gus. At least, I don't think so.

Hentei it's that not big of a deal, when you start to feel like the sensation isn't as strong just stop for a few days, when you start again you'll feel brand new, well thats what I do and it works.

[This message has been edited by vanillalick (edited 06-03-2004).]

^^^ When yer not usin' it...could I...I mean may I...lick the beater?!

Anything you want

quote:Originally posted by moonmeister:

^^^ When yer not usin' it...could I...I mean may I...lick the beater?!



and what may i ask has her juice got that my own exquisite vintage hasn't?

moonmeister i am disappointed in you.

oh and could we perhaps go back to discussing cocks and their rockwell grade?

Well for one, yours smells of rotten fish and STD's that only a 13 year whore could bring.

Not bathing and constant drug use has made you out to be trashy.

Now, why don't you go talk to your 40 year old husband and ask him about why his dick is so hairy/wrinkled/ugly/stinky/nasty/small.

Ok little girl?

carbon you tease! you know it turns me on so when you get all gruff and manly.hhhhmmmmmm

*crosses and uncrosses legs*

^^why do i get the feeling hentei isnt joking?

i don't recall saying i was joking...

anyway i see the sodomite is back with us.tell us jackketch do bumboys wake up with hard ons?

quote:Originally posted by Shodan's Own:

idiots! they live in giant hollowed out trees!

you're the idiot! everyone knows trolls live in caves!