We called it quits yesterday. Before her, it was a long long time before I'd been in the dating world. We saw each other everyday, and most of each day. We did all the things that couples do. I am not sad about losing her, though. It's not her I miss. It's the long nights where we would just stay up for no other reason than just to see each other longer. The kissing in public just so others would know how we feel. The going to the freezing beach in the middle of the night just to have memories. The holding each other after a not so good day. The falling asleep next to each other. The waking up with each other. The affection. There is nothing else like it in the world.

SOUNDS NICE

Oh well. Fuck it.

I've been there, it sucks. Everyone will say that you have to forgot about it. Yah, easier said than done. Theres no really getting over a person who was truly a part of you. This is how I grew up and learned that life sucks and the world isn't fair, that everything and anything can be taken at any time. It goes way beyond just a girlfriend...

So fuck it. I became an alcoholic at age 17 as a result. I had my first drink at age 14...life will keep sucking no matter how much goes right...you can make all the right moves and still get fucked in the end. So screw it. Go out, party, do drugs, fuck a lot of girls, whatever. In the end it doesn't matter because you will end up in the same hole.

Life sucks.

(BTW I'm 20 now...shit just doesn't end. Ever.)

[This message has been edited by Shady Milkman (edited 05-23-2004).]

Yeah, but eventually you will realize that it is, in fact her you miss, because you will, more than likely, never have memories like that with anyone else.

I totally know how you are feeling. I lost my virginity to my ex which we were together for a couple of months and then he broke up with me. He is the type of guy that is so sweet at times and then the next minute doesn't give a shit about you. But I missed the nights were together and the late night conversations and how he held me and everything good that ever happened. I missed the way he kissed me and how he used to bite my neck when he wanted to do stuff. We recently hooked up again and at times I don't want anything to do with him but then he has his good day were he cares and tells me everything I want to hear. But I seriously think I just don't want to give up the physical goodness he brought me. I think I'm just scared to realize I'll be alone without him.

yeah i split with my girl yesterday. i feel exactly the same.