ok is there something wrong with being happy single? all i hear from people is wah i want a boyfriend, i need a man, i need... i want... blah blah blah. i don't want a boyfriend and my friends think i'm weird, actually my friends are stupid when it comes to guys, one can't live without one and another loves the assholes. but the normal ones think i'm weird too.

someone told me i was dead inside, wtf! anyone else like the casual "flirting" and staying single?

"casual flirting" and staying single... you stupid dirty closet whore.



that's a sample of some of the replies you may get to this.

personally, i see nothing wrong with wanting to be single.

should i change the flirting? cuz everyone does it and i think its fun, screw people that think i'm a whore cuz i'm not off fucking anything with a dick

Nope. Nothing wrong with it. I had no interest in relationsips, until I decided to go out with my good friend (current g/f of 6 months now) and I'm happy. But no, nothing wrong. You should really just be happy, and not even need to ask for reasurance. Some people are dependant, and others independant. You are the latter, which is a sexy trait to me for example. So you're fine.

Absolutely nothing wrong at all with you (me too)!! Being uncommitted gives you freedom from jealous, controlling guys.

It also gives us a GREAT life!! There is nothing better for us than to have an unending supply of insatiable (sp.?) high energy guys who are so "driven" to make us their GF!!!! They actually think it can work, and we know better. So, in their pursuit, these guys treat us SOOOOooooo GOOD.......a hundred times better than they would if we were in a committed relationship with them!!

I don't know why girls ever move "up" to those "romantic" relationships, unless they like slavery, hurt feelings, bad treatment, and broken hearts. And for those girls who think "LOVE" can only come in a committed relationship....they are SO wrong!! You can "love" more than one man.....and you can enjoy "love" for a minute, an hour, or a day.....without giving up your freedom quality of life, by glueing yourself to one guy. Love, Venus.

quote:Originally posted by SARDONICPILLOW:

"casual flirting" and staying single... you stupid dirty closet whore.



that's a sample of some of the replies you may get to this.

personally, i see nothing wrong with wanting to be single.

Because you are single? Lol, just joking.

To me, being single is better then having a different boyfriend every week. You shouldn't have to depend on anyone else for happiness. You can find that happiness within yourself. The faster you find that out the better off you will be too. I am not saying that dating is a bad thing, but I also am not saying that being single is a bad thing. Being single gives most everyone the thought that you're independent and don't need someone there 24/7 holding your hand every step of the way. You are normal, and later on a boyfriend will come your way.

You really think all, or even a large majority of men are the cruel force in a relationship? I'm sorry, but I've had nothing but good relationships with the only harsh moment being the 'breaking up to move to another city/college for a job/education'. I treated those women well and they treated me well; I guess I'm lucky in finding women who aren't the psychotic self-loathing bitter types (Which would be the ones who subject themselves to abusive/unfulfilling relationships in attempts to fill their hollow shell of humanity...though the same goes for men who happen to be self-loathing and bitter).

quote:Originally posted by InimitableBallerina:

You shouldn't have to depend on anyone else for happiness. You can find that happiness within yourself.

Women seem to be infatuated with this idea. They get all pissed off when they feel dependant on a man for happiness. I gotta know, what the fuck is up with this? Are women just so rediciously self obsessed to completely disreguard the emotions they have with someone else just because it makes thier life slightly more comfortable.

If you ask me, nothing feels better than fully trusting someone, and knowing they won't hurt you. Do I get hurt a lot because of it? Hell yes, but I know that when I'm 60 years old I won't regret the things I failed at. Just the ones I didn't have enough gaul to do. If you love someone, go for it!

quote:Originally posted by pretty pinay:

Absolutely nothing wrong at all with you (me too)!! Being uncommitted gives you freedom from jealous, controlling guys.

It also gives us a GREAT life!! There is nothing better for us than to have an unending supply of insatiable (sp.?) high energy guys who are so "driven" to make us their GF!!!! They actually think it can work, and we know better. So, in their pursuit, these guys treat us SOOOOooooo GOOD.......a hundred times better than they would if we were in a committed relationship with them!!

Honestly, you are everything I hate in this world. If you could feel my hate for you right now, you might explode in a giant fireball. What you have just said is one of the most evil, closeminded things I can think of anyone being able to say. It's almost art really. Unfortunately it wasn't intended to be, and thats what makes it so awful. I really feel literally sick from reading this post. YOU *ARE* what's wrong with America, and whats wrong with the world. Someday people like you will get what's coming to you, and you will be treated like you have treated others. Being uncommitted gives you freedom from jealous, controlling guys? Being uncommitted gives you freedom from fucking batshit insane, idiotic sluts with a lower IQ than an old shoe(probably you). "There is nothing better for us than to have an unending supply of insatiable (sp.?) high energy guys who are so "driven" to make us their GF!!!! They actually think it can work, and we know better." I bet you WISH you had an unending supply of high energy guys who are "driven" to be your girlfriend, unfortunately that is clearly not the case as you are posting on the sex and affection message board. If any guy would be so fucking stupid to cater to a manipulator like you, he deserves to have his balls cut off, just like you deserve to FUCKING DIE

I always loved being single, the only time I ever didn't enjoy being single was in the winter, you see lots of couples snuggling and there are lots of couplish activities around Christmastime and that always sorta put me in the mood to have someone - Never to the point where I'd actually go out manhunting, though.

People just... bother me I guess. It's hard to find a guy that doesn't irritate the hell out of me after about 30 minutes of his company. I don't mean I'm moody or flitty, I'm laaaazy and I'd just prefer to have someone I can chill with and not have to worry about feigning interest. I'll probably end up the crazy old spinster that owns 30 cats and lives 2 doors down from you, doesn't sound so bad to me actually.

Yummm... Cats....

quote:Originally posted by pretty pinay:

And for those girls who think "LOVE" can only come in a committed relationship....they are SO wrong!! You can "love" more than one man.....and you can enjoy "love" for a minute, an hour, or a day.....without giving up your freedom quality of life, by glueing yourself to one guy. Love, Venus.



I disagree, I think love is... god this sounds crappy... the realization that two people are one.

I could be wrong though, but I've always thought of true love as an exclusively mutual thing.

True love is far less romantic than that...

True love is enjoying sleeping in the same bed with a person even though their anal emissions, if detected, would put the FBI on orange alert...

that is true love...





[This message has been edited by Sarcophagus (edited 05-16-2004).]

quote:Originally posted by pretty pinay:

Absolutely nothing wrong at all with you (me too)!! Being uncommitted gives you freedom from jealous, controlling guys.

It also gives us a GREAT life!! There is nothing better for us than to have an unending supply of insatiable (sp.?) high energy guys who are so "driven" to make us their GF!!!! They actually think it can work, and we know better. So, in their pursuit, these guys treat us SOOOOooooo GOOD.......a hundred times better than they would if we were in a committed relationship with them!!

I don't know why girls ever move "up" to those "romantic" relationships, unless they like slavery, hurt feelings, bad treatment, and broken hearts. And for those girls who think "LOVE" can only come in a committed relationship....they are SO wrong!! You can "love" more than one man.....and you can enjoy "love" for a minute, an hour, or a day.....without giving up your freedom quality of life, by glueing yourself to one guy. Love, Venus.



Your definition of "LOVE" sounds more like prostitution.

Remember people, she thinks you're virgin forever as long as there's a dick in the world you haven't fucked..

That being said, just reread Ms.Venus' post, imagine what the exact opposite would be, and that's my beliefs.

I have no time to rebut the rantings of idiots.

^^One smart cookie.

quote:Originally posted by Sarcophagus:

True love is far less romantic than that...

True love is enjoying sleeping in the same bed with a person even though their anal emissions, if detected, would put the FBI on orange alert...

that is true love...



Another smart cookie. mmmm...cookies.

Let's see. It's better to be one's own than in a relationship one has to "tolerate" or in a substandard relationship just for the sake of claiming to have a bf/gf. It's time consuming and produces headaches.

However, to be in a relationship with that certain perfect someone with whom you can be yourself and have this constant warm feeling inside is better than any drug, better than a month in the tropics, better than driving 140 mph on a deserted highway, better than 200 feet of visibility while scuba diving, better than Cristal champagne, and even better than a lifetime supply of Betsey Johnson dresses.

Sarc, you sound just like my girl. She is lazy, (not bad lazy) doesn't feign interest, which bothers me sometimes, but its ok, because I know she loves me. I would rather have the honesty. This girl is usually brutally honest.

quote:Originally posted by pretty pinay:

Absolutely nothing wrong at all with you (me too)!! Being uncommitted gives you freedom from jealous, controlling guys.

It also gives us a GREAT life!! There is nothing better for us than to have an unending supply of insatiable (sp.?) high energy guys who are so "driven" to make us their GF!!!! They actually think it can work, and we know better. So, in their pursuit, these guys treat us SOOOOooooo GOOD.......a hundred times better than they would if we were in a committed relationship with them!!

I don't know why girls ever move "up" to those "romantic" relationships, unless they like slavery, hurt feelings, bad treatment, and broken hearts. And for those girls who think "LOVE" can only come in a committed relationship....they are SO wrong!! You can "love" more than one man.....and you can enjoy "love" for a minute, an hour, or a day.....without giving up your freedom quality of life, by glueing yourself to one guy. Love, Venus.

You disgust me.

Is that all sex is about to you? Just laying back and getting serviced, letting the guy do all the work?

I can't believe this world sometimes.

You make me fucking sick.

Hi, Player 1: WOW!! Sorry I made you so angry, so hateful, and so hyperventilative (hope that's a word--hee hee!). Do you feel better now? Are you going to be OK?

PS: Oh, by the way, I'm not "what's wrong with America" (your words -- 'cause I don't think there's much at all wrong with America). But if there is anything wrong with America, can't be MY fault.....that's because I'm a a Filipina, a citizen of the Philippines, and live in Manila. Love, Venus.

Hi, MrMojoRisin: "Rantings of Idiots"? Not sure if you were describing my post, or Player 1's. If your disgust was toward "Player 1", I would hope you wouldn't be so severe. I think Player 1, MrMan, and Nihilism all live in the same cave, and they can't help calling all girls "bitches", prostitutes, or worse. As they mature, they will moderate their primitive and uncivilized ways, and will eventually and undoubtedly become salvageable relationship material.

If your disgust was for me, then I think you may be only half right.....what I posted might reasonably be called a "rant". (hee hee)!! But the part about "idiot" wasn't quite accurate, as you would soon discover if we met. However, I do apologise for causing you the severe, (even if only momentary) contempt and discomfort.

To help avoid future trauma and distress, please know that what I post here are just MY IDEAS...MY OPINIONS....which is what the original poster seemed to be wanting. What I post reflect what works for me in my own happy "Sex and Affection" life. Might not work as well (or at all) for others, I am sure....so others shouldn't believe it or follow it just because it works for me. But they should be aware that another ("idiotic"?) view does exist.

Love, Venus.

[This message has been edited by pretty pinay (edited 05-17-2004).]

Venus, you remind me of Mona from kurt vonnegut's book "Cat's Cradle"

i love the way posts just get all wrapped up in themselves. back to me

and i don't like use guys for sex and all that, i'm just not attracted to guys for a relationship

casual flirting means basically meet a guy for one night and i flirt with him for that one night

It doesn't matter where you live, Venus, there are a million chicks in America who live by that mentality and that's one of the biggest problems we have. You are, plain and simple, every man's nightmare. All you want to do is take advantage of people. Believe it or not, some people have emotions. And it hurts when people fuck around wtih them. You're a bitch.

That said, I'm hoping there was no need for any of it. When I first read your post, I thought you were joking. You seem reasonably intelligent sometimes. ...is that all phony?

Wow, this is interesting. Let me see if I can find out what is up with this post that has so many of you squirming.

quote:Originally posted by pretty pinay:

Absolutely nothing wrong at all with you (me too)!!

Agreed. I don’t find anything wrong with the original poster.

quote:Originally posted by pretty pinay:

Being uncommitted gives you freedom from jealous, controlling guys.



That is true. Many guys are jealous and controlling and being single does give you freedom from them.

quote:Originally posted by pretty pinay:

It also gives us a GREAT life!! There is nothing better for us than to have an unending supply of insatiable (sp.?) high energy guys who are so "driven" to make us their GF!!!! They actually think it can work, and we know better. So, in their pursuit, these guys treat us SOOOOooooo GOOD.......a hundred times better than they would if we were in a committed relationship with them!!



Guys do put out more effort in the beginning “courtship phase”. The amount of the drop off later varies, but it does happen. I find it hard to believe that some of you guys would not do the exact same thing if you really had the option of a never ending supply of hot women. I know I find it hard to stay with the same woman when she gets comfortable enough to “change” if the change is not to my liking. They are too easy to replace.

quote:Originally posted by pretty pinay:

I don't know why girls ever move "up" to those "romantic" relationships, unless they like slavery, hurt feelings, bad treatment, and broken hearts.

Many girls do like slavery. I say that joking, but I am also serious. Hurt feelings, bad treatment, and broken hearts may sound terrible, but for some reason they are intoxicatingly attractive for many. I don’t know if they are the other side of the coin of love, or if Miss Pretty is one of the few sane ones, but I bet most or all of you posting in this thread have had strong feelings become more intense for someone hurting you. We have all given advice to jump ship before, but now that someone is taking a proactive approach, she is nutz? Maybe there are other solutions, but at least she is not here complaining all the time about being in love with some asshole.

quote:Originally posted by pretty pinay:

And for those girls who think "LOVE" can only come in a committed relationship....they are SO wrong!! You can "love" more than one man.....and you can enjoy "love" for a minute, an hour, or a day.....without giving up your freedom quality of life, by glueing yourself to one guy. Love, Venus.

I have loved more than one girl at once. Does that trivialize love? I don’t know. I used to think so, but now I am not so sure. Anyways, I think Miss Pretty has a healthy attitude that will keep her out of trouble...till she falls for the right guy. Eventually, it will happen; till then, let her have her fun.

Love can certainly come in a committed relationship, but I think Miss Pretty has a point that it is not inherently unique to committed relationships. Maybe there is a level you cannot get past without commitment, but she is at a stage in her life where she is getting all she needs by being free. What is wrong with that? This “you need a man to be happy” attitude that all over this thread seems like it should come packaged nicely with a trip to the kitchen and no right to vote.

Personally, I think the single life before marriage is a bit better. You need to interact with more people and discover yourself before you know what you want for the rest of you life. Young people who are in long term committed relationships almost every day of their youth are halfway defined by the people they go out with. A few of these relationships may be okay, but the inability to be on your own really stunts your development as an individual.

It is funny to me how some of you took her post so personally. It is like you felt a rejection you experienced before all over again. If you want an easy conquest, go look for some girl that is more in love with the idea of being in love than they will ever be with you.

As for Mojo and Glitter questioning Miss Pretty’s intelligence, some explanation would help. It seems like more of an emotional reaction from you two rather than an opinion worthy of consideration. Miss Pretty has proven over and over to be one of the most insightful posters here, and I have learned more from her posts than from most of the rest of you.

quote:Originally posted by GlitterPunk112358:

You are, plain and simple, every man's nightmare.

I can assure you this is not true.

I think the reason they are mad at Pretty Pinnay is that she is acting like men are just to be used, so she can get her way and feel good about herself.

She's using guys that think they can get a relationship out of it. So then they do stuff for her, then realize she was just using them.

She is the reason lots of guys think girls are manipulative and bitches.

I think its just the women of our era. We should take away all their rights, make them stay home, and learn how to cook and clean again.

j/k

I find there are 2 sort of people in the world. People who think of themselves, and people who think of others.

quote:Originally posted by GlitterPunk112358:

It doesn't matter where you live, Venus, there are a million chicks in America who live by that mentality and that's one of the biggest problems we have. You are, plain and simple, every man's nightmare. All you want to do is take advantage of people. Believe it or not, some people have emotions. And it hurts when people fuck around wtih them. You're a bitch.

That said, I'm hoping there was no need for any of it. When I first read your post, I thought you were joking. You seem reasonably intelligent sometimes. ...is that all phony?

quote:Originally posted by weedman1234:

I think the reason they are mad at Pretty Pinnay is that she is acting like men are just to be used, so she can get her way and feel good about herself.

She's using guys that think they can get a relationship out of it. So then they do stuff for her, then realize she was just using them.

She is the reason lots of guys think girls are manipulative and bitches.

Exactly.

I mean do all of you who do that not realize how mean spirited,selfish, and hurtful that manipulative shit is?

I have been on the recieveing end of that a few times back in the day, and I can tell you it's fucking cruel. Not only do you have your heart broken, you find out that she was just using you for her personal gain. Id like to believe there are decent women out there, I really do. But because of attitudes like that, I don't trust women anymore. Im fucking tired of this shit.

[This message has been edited by Rat_Bastard (edited 05-18-2004).]

I used to get mad at girls that "used" me. Then I learned that it was my fault. If every girl gave away the milk without making us buy the cow, do you think guys would refuse it? Of course not. We would have a ball. If a guy is willing to give a girl whatever, then it is hers to take. If you feel bad about that, don't offer it. It sounds like you want to give gifts with strings attached, and that is not how it works. In fact, supplicating yourself actually makes you less attractive when you think you should be successfully bribing your way into a relationship. I do understand where you guys are coming from, but I don't feel bad for you. You just need to learn how to have a relationship without getting used. That is your responsibility, not hers.

bribing? I never said I gave any gifts. I don't know where you got the Idea that Id bribe people.

Even so, why are gifts now considered just "bribes"? Can't anyone just be kind anymore? O.K mabey if your buying a complete stanger a dimond ring. But why would you defend such behaviour? Where Someone delibratley takes advantage of your trust, lies to you, takes advantage of your emotions just for kicks or personal gain. And yet you say its our fault?

[This message has been edited by Rat_Bastard (edited 05-18-2004).]

A guy can give a girl something without expecting something in return. It's called being a nice person. And chicks who take advantage of this by pretending to be interested in a guy just so that she can get things from him are fucked up manipulative bitches. There might be some guys who give girls gifts in order to try to get pussy or something like that. But you can't judge every guy to be like that. Or any, for that matter. You can't say "oh, I think that one is in it for the pussy, so it's okay to take his money and pretend I like him"

Who said anything about anyone lying to you? Guys who are trying to get some girl often buy gifts or invest in them some way and expect something for it. When they don't get it, they feel used. It is not like the girl promises to be committed to them. Often they say they want to be single and have fun, and the guy still buys stuff/does stuff for them expecting to be the exception. The reason I called it bribes is because you would not feel used if they were really just gifts or altruistic acts. There is no reason to feel used if you did not expect something that was never promised to you. And yes Glitter, a guy can be nice and just buy something for a girl. I do it sometimes myself. There was a time when I would feel used if I did not feel I was getting my money's worth, but that is no longer the case.

If a girl says she wants to be your girlfriend, and makes a commitment and then cheats and breaks up with you right after you spend some serious cash, then you might have a point. But that is not how it normally works. Guys look for progression in a relationship that not only are they never promised, but are often told they are not going to get. When they don't get what they want, they feel used. Those guys are just dumb. It is just a continuation of the “I bought you dinner, now I deserve sex” attitude. If you buy a girl dinner; you bought her dinner. If you court a girl in any way; you court her. She can enjoy it on any level she wants. If she wants to be your girlfriend, she can. If she does not want that, then she does not have to be. It is that simple.

To answer your question about why I defend this behavior, there are two reasons. First of all, my outlook on this is realistic and pragmatic. My view allows me to adjust to how things really are and avoid the falling into the same problems over and over. There is nothing like not accepting any responsibility for what happens to you to insure that you have the same problems again.

The second reason, (which I learned later) is because it is right. We feel so strongly that we are being used, that it is hard to see things from her point of view. How would you like it if a generous act by another person could commit you to something. How would you like it if you could not accept things offered to you freely, without accepting some guilt or manipulation? If someone offers a girl a night of fun out on the town, why can’t she accept it and have fun and be fun without it being assumed she has to put out more? There is even a bigger issue. Who wants to be with a girl that only progresses the relationship out of obligation? Your gifts or taking her out or whatever just buys you her attention for a short period of time. It is up to you to make her like you in that time. If you succeed, you did it right. If you fail, move on. If you assume you had a right to succeed because you paid more than you thought her attention was worth, then you don’t know the first thing about relationships.



[This message has been edited by Easy Going (edited 05-18-2004).]

If a girl says she wants to be your girlfriend, and makes a commitment and then cheats and breaks up with you right after you spend some serious cash, then you might have a point.

That IS my point!

I don't mind if a girl dosent want to go out with me, thats fine. But what happened to me was she made a FALSE commitment just to use me! (except for the major cash part- she jsut got off emotional manipulation. There might of been a few dinners, but I don't exactly consider that a "gift" or obligation)

I just want to clairify, I have no problem if a girl wants to be single. I have quite a few friends I go out and drink with, and thats fine. My point was focusing ont he ones who lead you into a false relationship, or just leading you on (and I mean serious interest in you, and suddenly turning it around at the last minute) just to use you.

Any why are you still insisting on gifts=obligation/bribes? Glitter and I allready clairified that was not it.

[This message has been edited by Rat_Bastard (edited 05-18-2004).]

quote:Originally posted by Player1:



Honestly, you are everything I hate in this world. If you could feel my hate for you right now, you might explode in a giant fireball. What you have just said is one of the most evil, closeminded things I can think of anyone being able to say. It's almost art really. Unfortunately it wasn't intended to be, and thats what makes it so awful. I really feel literally sick from reading this post. YOU *ARE* what's wrong with America, and whats wrong with the world. Someday people like you will get what's coming to you, and you will be treated like you have treated others. Being uncommitted gives you freedom from jealous, controlling guys? Being uncommitted gives you freedom from fucking batshit insane, idiotic sluts with a lower IQ than an old shoe(probably you). "There is nothing better for us than to have an unending supply of insatiable (sp.?) high energy guys who are so "driven" to make us their GF!!!! They actually think it can work, and we know better." I bet you WISH you had an unending supply of high energy guys who are "driven" to be your girlfriend, unfortunately that is clearly not the case as you are posting on the sex and affection message board. If any guy would be so fucking stupid to cater to a manipulator like you, he deserves to have his balls cut off, just like you deserve to FUCKING DIE

You say all this... yet you call yourself a "Player"

[This message has been edited by Asphyxiated (edited 05-18-2004).]

take into thought of girls who realise they don't want the guy they're with and wanting to end a relationship because it would be a headache to continue something they don't believe in, because they would end up lying to themselves and the guy they are with that there is "something" to go on. it wouldn't be just to use you, it'd be wanting to not continue using you because they also have to think for their own emotions as well as yours. "survival of the fittest" wise, you'd have to think of your own life first before thinking of another's.

^ that's a completley different senario. THat is love from the strt, and just ended because it didnt work out.

The ones I am talking about ones are false form the START. Hell I found out from her friends that it was just to use me. She did the same to lots of people.

How many times do I have say this?

wow!

I learned alot from this thread... including from the girls.

never knew that..

quote:Originally posted by Rat_Bastard:

If a girl says she wants to be your girlfriend, and makes a commitment and then cheats and breaks up with you right after you spend some serious cash, then you might have a point.

That IS my point!



If that is you point, you are not following this thread very closely. The posts you quoted were responding Miss Pretty’s post, and she said that guys were trying to make her their girlfriend and that she does not even get in a committed relationship.

quote:Originally posted by Rat_Bastard:

I don't mind if a girl dosent want to go out with me, thats fine. But what happened to me was she made a FALSE commitment just to use me! (except for the major cash part- she jsut got off emotional manipulation. There might of been a few dinners, but I don't exactly consider that a "gift" or obligation)

I just want to clairify, I have no problem if a girl wants to be single. I have quite a few friends I go out and drink with, and thats fine. My point was focusing ont he ones who lead you into a false relationship, or just leading you on (and I mean serious interest in you, and suddenly turning it around at the last minute) just to use you.



I guess this depends on what you mean by “lead on” and “made a false commitment”. If you mean she was nice but did not like you as much or as long as you hoped (which is normally the case) and then you felt used, then my point stands. If she said she loved you and she married you and she was just after your money, then that is different. There needs to be someone breaking an actual commitment that they should have never made in the first place for you to have a point. Once again, the post that I was defending specifically said she did not even start a commited relationship.

quote:Originally posted by Rat_Bastard:

Any why are you still insisting on gifts=obligation/bribes? Glitter and I allready clairified that was not it.



In order for someone to feel used in the scenario of this thread, they feel used for something. They bought her a gift, or they took her out, or they helped her or something. If you just like a girl, she never makes a commitment and eventually moves on, and you feel used, you are just an idiot.

I think you are confused about what we were talking about. Here are some highlights for you:

She was talking about no commitment:



quote:Originally posted by pretty pinay:

Being uncommitted gives you freedom

Guys trying to win commitment do stuff for her:

quote:Originally posted by pretty pinay:

high energy guys who are so "driven" to make us their GF!!!!

They do stuff for a girl that is not committed to them:

quote:Originally posted by pretty pinay:

So, in their pursuit, these guys treat us SOOOOooooo GOOD.......a hundred times better than they would if we were in a committed relationship with them!!

She does not even start the committed relationship:

quote:Originally posted by pretty pinay:

I don't know why girls ever move "up" to those "romantic" relationships,

You can review the post on the first page if you want.



[This message has been edited by Easy Going (edited 05-18-2004).]

Ok, granted the other posts after seemed to change the issue a little, and that was lead to my post.

If you want to know what I ment by "leading on" I mean someone going out and telling you directly they love you, want to go out,be your BF, ect. (telling they WANT to be commited) When they actually don't even care for you, and just want to prey on your emotions/generosity. That is what I mean by "False From the start".

This is not to be confused with, actual love form the start and just not working out. Or someone just being a nice friend.

THere is a BIG difference between being a a single girl who just wants to be friends, and a girl who wants to be single, but tells you she wants to be in a commited relationship, which is a lie.

That is what I was talking about the whole time.

*****EDIT*****:

You did leave out one important detail on that post which is this line before the treat us so good part:

"They actually think it can work, and we know better.

This is where it is taken the wrong way. The "we know better" is saying they are playing along, and sustaining the flase interest, to gain praise,ect. A normal girl who wants to be single OUTRIGHT TELLS YOU, instead of bullshitting you, into thinking she is not commited into being single.

Granted that might not be what she ment, but I can tell you it sure sounded like it, and many people caught on.

[This message has been edited by Rat_Bastard (edited 05-18-2004).]

She can tell you she wants to be single, or she can let you think what you want. If you don't have a commitment and think you do, you have no one to blame but yourself. What Miss Pretty was talking about is guys thinking that their gestures are getting them somewhere. When a guy starts thinking that way, there is almost nothing you can do to convince him otherwise. Some girls may try to be on the up and up once or twice the first few times it happens to them, and then learn to just let guys figure it out on their own. Her knowledge that you are not getting anywhere does not mean she is using you. Would you really want to just go out on dates with girls that were already in love with you? You have a chance to win them when you go out. Her mind can change. You get that chance. If it turns out how she expects, big fucking deal. She did not wrong you. She did not steal from you. She did not lie to you. You misled yourself and she witnessed it. There is nothing wrong with that.

[This message has been edited by Easy Going (edited 05-18-2004).]

Your still thinking this as a normal case of a couple coming together. This is not the case, and I have said it time and time again.

As I said before, her friends (who were more decent than she was) told me she WAS using me, as well as plenty of others. She WAS delibritley using people. Why do you not get this?

quote:Originally posted by Rat_Bastard:

Your still thinking this as a normal case of a couple coming together. This is not the case, and I have said it time and time again.

As I said before, her friends (who were more decent than she was) told me she WAS using me, as well as plenty of others. She WAS delibritley using people. Why do you not get this?

First thing you need "to get" is what were are talking about. This convo evolved out of Miss Pretty's post, and you directly responded to in your last post:

quote:Originally posted by Rat_Bastard:

*****EDIT*****:

You did leave out one important detail on that post which is this line before the treat us so good part:

"They actually think it can work, and we know better.

This is where it is taken the wrong way. The "we know better" is saying they are playing along, and sustaining the flase interest, to gain praise,ect. A normal girl who wants to be single OUTRIGHT TELLS YOU, instead of bullshitting you, into thinking she is not commited into being single.

Granted that might not be what she ment, but I can tell you it sure sounded like it, and many people caught on.



That is what I was answering.

She does not have to tell you. She can go out with you for any reason she wants. She can go for the free meal. If you offer it for nothing, she can take it for nothing.

There is something I posted on the first page that probably should be highlighted:

quote:Originally posted by Easy Going:

It is funny to me how some of you took her post so personally. It is like you felt a rejection you experienced before all over again.

Ok, so we were not talking about the same things, 2 different interpretations came out one issue.

Now I see it that way. Sorry for taking offence, but I thought you were reffering to the second interpritaion (the few ppl directly after pinnays post, not the original.

Perhaps I did not make it clear in my first post, and because of what I DIDN"T say, all of these toothy things are being said about me in all of these explosive responses. So let me make it CLEAR.

1. I have never, ever (REPEAT, "NEVER EVER") done anything to "lead a man on". I have always -- as soon as I think he is interested in more than my company -- that I am NOT INTERESTED in a relationship of any kind. I don't just imply it, I SAY IT!!

2. Like EasyGoing has said, that often doesn't make any differeece to the guys. They will still treat me very good, and give me gifts. I don't reject what they do for e VOLUNTARILY, and with their eyes wide open that NO RELATIONSHIP is going to come out of it.

3. The reason I said that I KNOW, and THEY DON'T know that no relationship is going to happen is that guys DON'T WANT TO BELIEVE IT!! No matter what I tell them, they will still often continue to treat me the same way. I don't feel guilty or bad about that. And I shouldn't. IT'S NOT MY PROBLEM!!!

So EasyGoing has it right!! And I am not the evil person some of you seem to think I am. Love, Venus.

guys.. this 'venus' person is probably just some forty something trucker who is recovering a sex change. dont sweat it.

(is it just me or does 'she' also overuse exclamation marks)

yeah, she has been trolling totse as a female for 2.5 years

Actually, Miss Pretty is all woman and as hot as they come. I don't doubt for a second that guys fall all over themselves for her no matter what she tells them.

Engaging in casual dating/affairs is still seen by some as a man's privilege, as is the decision to make a commitiment. Seems that if a man wants a commitment, a woman is making a social transgression is she declines. Women like P-Pinay, who think and act independently (and have an amazing figure) might be seen as a threat to some, both male and female, who, for whatever reason (environment, upbringing, ignorance) cling to "traditional" social order. I really don't see why her point of view should bother so many people here; many of you are still at an age where you should be forming your own ideologies and questioning prevailing ones.

quote:Originally posted by Easy Going:

I used to get mad at girls that "used" me. Then I learned that it was my fault.

Actually, maybe its not the fault of women for pulling shit like this, maybe its the fault of guys like this. Someone shoot this man.

quote:Originally posted by Easy Going:

yeah, she has been trolling totse as a female for 2.5 years

Actually, Miss Pretty is all woman and as hot as they come. I don't doubt for a second that guys fall all over themselves for her no matter what she tells them.

actually Easy Going is probably a woman as well, it wouldn't surprize me.

lol, I'm a dude, and you don't sound like much of a playa to me.

The only people who worry about being alone for the rest of their life and not having a significant other from what i've seen are emotionally insecure, not self-sufficient, etc. They're just dieing to have someone to be the center of their world because they are incapable of making their own world. I'm not saying this is implied to anyone with a significant other, just the ones who can't go without one for any period of time and desire/dwell on it.

I'm a single male and I'm perfectly fine. Yes, I have been involved, but it's not something I desire. If i'm walking down the street and meet someone that I happen to fall in love with, then that's the way it is, but it's not something I search for, it's just something that comes around if it wants to.

quote:Originally posted by Easy Going:

yeah, she has been trolling totse as a female for 2.5 years

Actually, Miss Pretty is all woman and as hot as they come. I don't doubt for a second that guys fall all over themselves for her no matter what she tells them.

You're a tool. You've obviously let the fact that you're a good guy, and she's hot shit, get in the way of you fact that she is a complete bitch.

^whatever dude...the funny thing is that any guy who thinks what she is doing is unfair to men is actually the tool. If you could stand up for youself and be a man, girls like Miss Pretty would not frighten you. If you have no real personality of your own and just try to do tricks for chicks to get some lovin, but end up getting your feelings hurt...boo-fucking-hoo

btw, fear of manipulation/being used is a turn off. Girls can smell it on you, and they don't want to fuck you if they do.

Well I'm a man, and I can tell you that ladies like Ms. Pinay are NOT my worst nightmare, they're no nightmare at all.

So a pretty gal likes to fuck, and doesn't expect anything else from the guy? No phone calls a day later, no nothing, and something's wrong with that? Please, that's a man's wet dream, not his nightmare.

That being said, I also agree with whomever said that the best thing of all is to be in a relationship with that 'special' someone, not just any someone but that one person you can both be comfortable with just being yourselves around, and not having to put up with any of that fake bullshit.

quote:I don't know why girls ever move "up" to those "romantic" relationships, unless they like slavery, hurt feelings, bad treatment, and broken hearts.

Damn, someone has really done you wrong in the past huh? Sorry if they did... Not all us guys are slavedrivers.

quote:I don't mean I'm moody or flitty, I'm laaaazy and I'd just prefer to have someone I can chill with and not have to worry about feigning interest.

You & I would get along... That is, unless smoking pot bothers you.



Oh, and how do you guys do that quote with the author's name? I thought it was quote=username in the [] tags, but I guess not...

Hi Luther: One of the brackets was missing, and if you don't hit the "quote" button in the original pster's post, you need to manually type [ quote]Originally posted by xxxx:

Without the space, of course.--DC



[This message has been edited by LutherX (edited 05-19-2004).]

[This message has been edited by deadlycindy (edited 05-19-2004).]

Thanks Cindy

theres nothing wrong with it, ive been just having fun being single and flirting with many different chicks for a while now but i really want to fuck this chick i work with, i heard shes really good at riding dick... fuck, i want lay her...