well? please share

(sorry but i am boring and have no stories of my own)

I got a straw stuck up my nose once. it's a long story & i'd rather not go into details. lets just say it was embarassing

wel there was this suoper hot chick .. i wanted to fuck soo much.. i took her to the cinema.. to see a romance movie ya know.. all chicks crak up to this shit.. to i said.. well ill give it a shot.. so i went to it.. we saw.. some shit like.. romeo and juliette.. or anways.. she wanted to see it.. so i followed her.. and i had to piss so badly during the movie so i told her.. that i had to go piss.. so i got up and walked to the pisotory.. i pissed .. and pissed my pants.. 1st off.. smellling like piss isisnt good.. so it tooked me a shit load of time to wash it off.. ...... after cleaning it all up. i FINALY got back top the movie and the chick.. 2nd. sitted one row too far.. so i was like talking to this chick.. with my date BEHIND ME.. she gave me a shit truck of bull shit like.. wtf .. im your date not this hoe.. and all tha tshit.. so i went back to her.. saying sorry.. and alll.. to the movie kinda ggot dark.. i said perfect time to slip my fingers on her.. i started touching her.. she liked it and told me to got lower.. i was so pleased to her that i didnt hesitated.. sliped my finger in the middle of her lgez. TO FIND A DICK..

i got up .. and puked in her.. leaving RINING MY ASS OFF..

never saw this hoe again... and hope to never again

quote:Originally posted by jcl666:

wel there was this suoper hot chick .. i wanted to fuck soo much.. i took her to the cinema.. to see a romance movie ya know.. all chicks crak up to this shit.. to i said.. well ill give it a shot.. so i went to it.. we saw.. some shit like.. romeo and juliette.. or anways.. she wanted to see it.. so i followed her.. and i had to piss so badly during the movie so i told her.. that i had to go piss.. so i got up and walked to the pisotory.. i pissed .. and pissed my pants.. 1st off.. smellling like piss isisnt good.. so it tooked me a shit load of time to wash it off.. ...... after cleaning it all up. i FINALY got back top the movie and the chick.. 2nd. sitted one row too far.. so i was like talking to this chick.. with my date BEHIND ME.. she gave me a shit truck of bull shit like.. wtf .. im your date not this hoe.. and all tha tshit.. so i went back to her.. saying sorry.. and alll.. to the movie kinda ggot dark.. i said perfect time to slip my fingers on her.. i started touching her.. she liked it and told me to got lower.. i was so pleased to her that i didnt hesitated.. sliped my finger in the middle of her lgez. TO FIND A DICK..

i got up .. and puked in her.. leaving RINING MY ASS OFF..

never saw this hoe again... and hope to never again

You will learn as you get older that were not complete idiots.

long story short...

living in south florida, we have the everglades. so this chick i was gonna go out with that night wanted to go see it (she was in college here from outta town) so i agreed. halfway through the date, thoroughly out in the middle of nowhere in the glades, i turn to her and say, in all seriousness 'you know i could kill you right now and nobody would know' and just turned back forward and continued driving. turns out i scared the shit out of her when i talked to her the next day. i still banged her, heh.

You should close this thread. The long title is fucking shit up.

quote:Originally posted by GlitterPunk112358:

You should close this thread. The long title is fucking shit up.

no it isn't, you're fucking shit up.

Making out in a moive with my mother in the back row....

oh I have a few others to mention.



Sex in a very public beach (I mean, near a trail where people on bicycles would pass by) with a cop just around the corner.

Also, at a school dance, picked some random girl, took her behind the band stands.

Got to second base with her while a teacher was getting a free show.

quote:Originally posted by GlitterPunk112358:

You should close this thread. The long title is fucking shit up.

Allow people to discuss and converse over a matter as they choose... or oppress them for the visual appearance of a few colours on your screen, which means nothing compared to the words they write and read?

It's amazing how much basic aesthetics mean to people nowadays, the entire world will be as shallow as a puddle by the time I die at this rate.

I've got you all beat.

It was homecoming, my senior year of high school. I went with a guy friend from a different high school, along with my two best friends and their boyfriends.

We went to this nice Italian restaurant on the river, and we three girls were starving. We ordered an appetizer of calamari, for us all to share. Well, those of you that have had calamari know that it's normally fried ring-like things of it. This was actual baby squid, tentacles and all, and underneath the breading, it was purple. My date thought it would be funny to tear off the breading and make it dance in front of my face as I put one in my mouth. I got grossed out, but didn't want to spit it out in front of everyone, so after barely chewing it, I swallowed it. BIG MISTAKE.

A minute later, it felt like something was stuck in my throat, so I went to the bathroom to check it out. It looked like a fish hook was stuck in my tonsil! I ran out and told my friend, who told the manager. She didn't believe us, but once she saw it, grabbed a fork and knife and said, "I can try to get that out for you." ?!?!?!? WHO on their right mind would even THINK to suggest that?!?

After freaking out at that comment, and yelling at the manager, my friend and her boyfriend rushed me to the ER. Her parents are doctors at that particular hospital, so they called ahead and let them know we were on our way. As soon as I got there, they took X-rays (to see how far down it was, whether there were pieces in my lungs, exactly where it was lodged, etc.). My mom shows up with a towel on her head (just out of the shower), and my dad and brother in their camo with the dog (they'd been hunting).

After sitting in the room for awhile, they numbed my throat and nose, and went in after it. It turned out to be a metal piece (about three inches long) from one of those SOS pads restaurants use to scrub the grill with! When I walked out of the room, about 30 of my friends were all there waiting for me (everyone called everyone on their way).

Well, I wasn't going to let that spoil my evening, so we went to homecoming anyway...except that this school has strict rules, and you can't get in after 45 minutes after the dance has started, and you can't leave until it's over. They lock you in. So we had to call ahead and explain the situation, and I had to wear my ER bracelet underneath my corsage as proof. (In the pictures, you can actually see a bit of it sticking out from beneath the corsage.) By the time we'd gotten there, everyone had heard about Luke's date that got a hook stuck in her throat...and the rumor became that Luke took a hooker to homecoming.

That's my story, I hope it's entertaining enough!