I am totally against cheating. I think that it is wrong. But here's the deal... I was talking to my boyfriend on the phone and he wasn't talking much... He was really short.. I would ask him something and usually he would talk to me about stuff and he was just like yeah, no, etc. I was really hurt by this and asked him what was wrong and he said nothing. I knew that there was something wrong so I asked him again and he said Do you like David? (David is his best friend... David and I are also friends.)I said no of course not I love you Ben why would I want to be with David? and he said well You still owe David for the time that he took you home. (David told me that I owed him something for him taking me home and getting a truancy and with David it meant something sexual) a week or two before David was talking to me on the phone and was trying to get me to do stuff with him and he was asking me to cheat on Ben. I told him no I would never, could never do that. I would never even think of cheating on Ben. EVER! and someone told Ben that I was planning on cheating on him with David. He wouldn't tell me who told him that. It was not true at all... and anyways Ben got all freaked out about it and the next day I was depressed because of all this and he told me not to worry about it... How am I not supposed to worry about it?

What should I do? Try to figure out why he would think these things or just not worry about it? Thanks... This is sort of confusing!

I can obviously not know what he's thinking... so I can only give it a try.

First of: I don't even think about the possibility of cheating, even if I would have the chance... It's so bad (good actually) that when I see a girl, I think about my girlfriend... Anyhow...

It seems to me, that he's just scared... I mean, you love him, so I take a leap here, and assume he loves you to. With love comes trust, yes... But if someone plants a tiny seed, jealousy can grow really quickly... Combine jealousy with love, and you can have two things: anger and/or fear... Fear you don't love him that much, to be faithfull... maybe even feeling not to be enough... but, honestly, I'm taking quite a big risk here... Chances are that I am wrong, I don't know him, I don't know you...

What my gf and I would do, is take a seat, and talk it out... I trust her, fully, but I would need to hear her say it, don't think that yr boyfriend doesn't trust you... Just, I would need confirmation, maybe that's what he's looking for...

Also: try and imagine a friend of yours telling you that Ben is going to cheat on you... What is your reaction?

But really, communicate...

I know, a long rant perhaps, just hopes it helps a bit...

Edit: I would be worried about who the hell is trying to destroy my relationship...

--SEmper

[This message has been edited by --SEmper (edited 05-04-2004).]

Your most likley his first serious girlfriend guys are really insecure over there first serious girlfriend.

^ its true. my current girlfriend is my second real serious one, and I have some SERIOUS trust issues (not only with her, but with everyone). my previous gf cheated on me, so that pretty much ruined any chance that I would trust anyone ever again, since I see that as one of the worst things you could do to someone. anyways, I've been with my current girlfriend for almost 3 years and even though it is SOOOO hard for me to do, I know that I have to just trust her, and trust that she will never cheat on me. I get scared sometimes, but I just try to relax and remember things shes told me about how she feels and how she would never do something like that. the problem is that I dont trust ANYONE about anything. no one is allowed to touch any of my stuff, especially stuff in my room. this counts for everyone EXCEPT my gf. if there is anyone I trust, its her. so when I do get scared, I just have to trust her (which is obviously hard because of my previous gf).

anyhoo, my point is that he probably IS just scared. reassure him, and tell david to fuck off or you'll mace him. do this in front of ben if at all possible, so he can see how serious you are about not cheating.

Eh, its a topic about cheating so here i go. I tonight recieved oral sex from a person that i am not in a relationship with. I am engaged to a wonderful girl and really dont know why i did this. I know the typical response i will get but can anyone give me some advice? Im confussed right now and am not entirely sure what to think or do about my actions. Help please?

Someone21special, you really need to talk to your BF and not just talk but communicate. Insecurity breeds mistrust and if you've honestly given him no reason to mistrust you he has issues. Maybe they can be resolved if the two of you sit down and relate. If not, from your side of the story, I'd have to say run far away.

Fascistsmasher, if you care about your supposed GF, come clean, let her slap the shit out of you for being a cheating prick and learn from it.

I usually let my friends have sex with my girlfriends, what are friends for? Besides, it's fun to watch.

ha!... life sucks, shit go's on, and you will get over this.

The best advice i have ever been givin, i thought, id pass it on

quote:Originally posted by Fascistsmasher:

Eh, its a topic about cheating so here i go. I tonight recieved oral sex from a person that i am not in a relationship with. I am engaged to a wonderful girl and really dont know why i did this. I know the typical response i will get but can anyone give me some advice? Im confussed right now and am not entirely sure what to think or do about my actions. Help please?

Come clean. And if you do love your fiancee, beg for forgiveness and once she starts talking to you again, you really need to talk about it and try and find out why you would do something that would hurt the one you love.

Sounds like your what, 15? who cares, it will never last anyways.

Anyways, to me, Once I cheated on my girlfriend so that she would dump me so I wouldnt feel as bad when I had to (she was pissing me off, if i want to play with high voltage i will, i know what im doing, i dont need you preacing about fucking dieing) I did it that way becuase every time she gets dumped (apparently) she cries? what the?

Didnt work though, she assumed I was lying, taking the piss, aye gov?

So I told her to go now. Oh, at that point in my life was very hard so I dont care what you call me.

[This message has been edited by skank (edited 05-05-2004).]

quote:Originally posted by Ghast:

I usually let my friends have sex with my girlfriends, what are friends for? Besides, it's fun to watch.

I dont know if you are trolling or not, but I would rather be dead than watch anyone but ME nail my gf. I would normally say that everyone have thier own things they like, but I could never condone that, no matter who it is. sorry.