What if my son has his eyes?

His smile?

His laugh?

Will it break my heart everytime I look at my boy?

You will hate it and cherish it. The boy is a product of your affection, yet it could embody the dislike and ..."not nice" feelings.

Its how you live life that determines how you hold things.

It shouldn't, because you should know that your boy is his own person, not your ex. Think of your situation in the light: the kid may have some qualities of your ex, but if you bring him up right, will not do the things that some ol' jerk did to hurt you. You knew your son would be a different and amazing person in your heart, that's why you continued with the pregnancy. Try not to be scared of those things, and embrace your baby boy for the precious individual you know he is. If he has your ex's laugh or smile, remember it fondly, but remember that now that quality is found in a better person.

I'm no kind of expert, but I hope that helped a little....

Gag him and make him ware a balaclava and sunnies..

Or forgive and forget... Time heals all.... i talk from experience.

One day, you may be glad about it.

Your kid will have "your" qualities and charecteristics too you know.Isnt that good enouph?

Sarc, can I PLEASE shake your hand?

Oh, and to be helpful, no it won't break your heart. Let me tell you a story about my baby nephew, Porkchop.



When we first heard that my brother had gotten his girlfriend pregnant, we were worried how the child would turn out, both physically and mentally. Simply put, his mother is a piece of shit. Think of your typical trailor trash, lazy ass, dirty, smelly, ugly, poor, stupid, fatass man. Change trailor trash to project scum and you have his mother. She has no redeeming qualities what-so-ever, so of course we figured the baby would turn out horrible.



For nine months, we worried about the baby turning out just like her first child (God's biggest mistake). When the baby finally came, he hardly resembled his mother. He looked enough like her to tell it was hers, but the point is no matter how much we can't stand his mother, we still like him.



Just because the baby might look like his dad, doesn't mean that your feelings for him will change anymore than if you two were still happily together. The love between you and your child will overcome any negative feelings you have for his father.

[This message has been edited by ChubZero (edited 03-25-2004).]

Of course, it's made harder when there are still positive feelings for the father.

There's no way to tell what in your son will remind you of Ben. Even working under the safe assumption *something* will, what that is will have an effect on your reaction.

I think, though, that you're underestimating the impact the kid, being in your arms, in the flesh, will have on you. It'll remind you of him, but it won't be him, and you'll know it. Maybe that will inspire you to raise him towards Ben's positive aspects and away from his negatives.

You'll be ok. You can't not be ok. It's not in you.

I'm sorry- off topic, But i was just wondering how old you are sarcophagos?

[This message has been edited by Bazooka Joe (edited 03-26-2004).]

Abortion is ur friiend,u must go visit now.........

No. You will get over Ben and find someone else.

Sarcophagus, you remind me of that chick from the movie "Riding In Cars With Boys".

I think you should read 'The Scarlet Letter' by Nathaniel Hawthorne: it may provide insight into your position.

hey sarc wanna marry me?

lmao sorry im in a sad mood, hell, i like kids, im nice, im smart, funny ( kinda sacrastic). im not like everyone else. Im a great bf. it could work.

[This message has been edited by bushy (edited 03-27-2004).]

simply solution: kill the bastard.

then again, he already made you fat and ugly so you might as well keep the piece of shit.

He'll remind you of the good times.