I'm having a problem. I just can't get any girls to like me, to go out with me, or anything like that. I think it's because I'm too nice to them.

First off, I'm very self-conscience(sp?). I really tall for my age (6'5+ at age 16) and overweight (290 or so). I'm a massive guy. I don't really look scary or anything. I'm one of the nicest guys you'll meet (not me talking, I've been told this). So for anyone of the girls here, or maybe guys if you swing that way, how tall is too tall? How fat (big, overweight, whatever you wanna call it) is too fat? I hear girls say they like tall men all the time, and a few that like "big" men (tall and a bit fatter than most). I'm kind of confused on that whole thing. Is it the taller the better?

Another thing. I think I'm too nice. I hang out with girls my age all the time, but none of them see me ass boyfriend material. I know this because I asked one of my girl friends (who I've been close friends with for a few years) if she would ever see me as boyfriend material, not asking her on a date, but just being curious. She said no. i asked her why, and she replied "Well, you are the nicest guy I know, and you're funny and everything. I just... I dunno what it is. I just don't see you that way." It's my guess that this would be the answer I got from most of the girls I hang out with. I just don't know what I am doing wrong. All of these girls that are cool, cute, and fun to hang out with all have boyfriends who are assholes who care about nothing but themselves. They treat these girls like shit, and the girls worship them. I feel as if it's a bad thing to treat a girl nicely. I just don't get it.

I need help. What should I do? What are the main traits a girl looks for in a guy? It seems that I'm always the guy that they can talk to and hang out with, but when I ask them out or something they turn me down. It's really starting to piss me off. I've never had a girl friend. These are the years that I should be dating and all that, and going to parties, and hanging out with friends. I don't do any of that. Someone help?

Girl generally don't like men so fat that they need a road-map to find his cock.

Thanks for the help, Trippy!

Anyone else wanna make me feel shittier? I'm this close to an ether binge *Holds fingers really close together*.

Most likely it is becuase you fall in the friend zone and it's probably because you don't present the type of confidence that girls cling onto.

If you don't feel comfortable taking your shirt off then you are probably to big. I myself am about 230 lbs. at 6'2" and I am still overweight.

I think you are probably overweight and if you dropped a few pounds though it's not needed to be liked or to find someone to like you. I think it will give you a boost in self esteem and make you even more enjoyable to be around.

It is definately not your height that is making you lose attention from the ladies it is probably your lack of confidence.

Do you currently do any type of athletics or sports? It seems like you would be perferct for football. I hate football though and some big guys do and some of the things that come along with being on a football team are kinda lame and sickening at times.

I suggest to find a sport you want to play and drop to shed some weight, maybe start watching what you eat and just try to not worry about getting a girl your just sixteen and TRUST me there are so many more things that are more important then that.

Even though some 14 year old will come on here saying there is nothing better then fucking some girl at a party when your wasted when this is probably stuff he hears about from his friends.

Hook up with Lazy Jayne. Ah, TOTSE, bringing lonely people together...

But seriously, get into shape. I'm doing the South Beach diet and an hour of cardio a day. I've already lost over fifteen pounds. I was cleaning up my old room and came across some pictures of me from a few years ago. My first thought was, "Damn, I was so fat back then..."

It's a good feeling. I'm at an age where most of my friends are starting to gain weight, and I'm in the opposite camp

***edited for grammar

***edited for additional tip: One of the reasons I was such a fatass back in the day was I HATED team sports. I'm a perfectionist; I tend to freak out if I feel like the team would be doing better if I suddenly had a heart attack and died. I don't know if you have the same problem, but if you do, I recommend noncompetitive excercise, like walking, weight training, and swimming. Swimming is good because it touches on all the major muscle groups.

[This message has been edited by Schraff (edited 03-22-2004).]

[This message has been edited by Schraff (edited 03-22-2004).]

quote:Originally posted by CarbonB:

Do you currently do any type of athletics or sports? It seems like you would be perferct for football. I hate football though and some big guys do and some of the things that come along with being on a football team are kinda lame and sickening at times.

I don't play any sports because of physical problems. I used to skateboard when I was younger, and fucked both my knees up and broke my right ankle like 3 times. That was the only thing that was keeping me skinny. As soon as my parents said no mroe skating (Financial problems. $12,000 for ankle surgery, close to $40,000 on just my ankle alone) I just kinda porked out. Couldn't do anything about it.

quote:Even though some 14 year old will come on here saying there is nothing better then fucking some girl at a party when your wasted when this is probably stuff he hears about from his friends.

Yeah, if I wanted to go to a party and find a girl that drank 3/4 bottle of vodka and smoked 4 blunts and can barely stand, and fuck her, I could. That's not what I'm about. I'm not trying to get laid. I could get laid right now if I wanted to. But I don't. I want a girlfriend.

Ahhh a fat women who can give good BJ's what a treasure in a lost chest!

I am only kidding. Diets are a fad, just don't diet so you can go back to being fat 2 months after you hit goal weight.

It's alright to eat alot, eat alot of fruits/chicken/tuna/salad. All these things can fill you up to where you hurt but are easily digestiable.

You get into problems when you eat alot of things that your body can't break down as easily and it just turns them into fat.

So I suggest cutting back fast foods to 2 days a week then 1 day a week then maybe 1 time every 2 weeks.

After awhile fast food will become unappealing to you and you will beable to get into shape and get alot more energy from healthier foods.

I didnt bother to read the other responses, so sorry if I am just reposting things. But how are you fat? are you like wide, offensive line style? Or do you just have rolls? The big buff guys are sexy. But i also know a guy who's maybe 5'5 and 350 lbs. and he gets more than he should.

It could just be your friends that dont see you as boyfriend material. Have you tried approaching anyone out of your circle of friends? If you have gone for years as the cool friend, you wont be boyfriend material.

quote:Originally posted by CarbonB:

It's alright to eat alot, eat alot of fruits/chicken/tuna/salad. All these things can fill you up to where you hurt but are easily digestiable.

You get into problems when you eat alot of things that your body can't break down as easily and it just turns them into fat.

So I suggest cutting back fast foods to 2 days a week then 1 day a week then maybe 1 time every 2 weeks.

After awhile fast food will become unappealing to you and you will beable to get into shape and get alot more energy from healthier foods.

I hardly eat fast food. Maybe once every 2 or 3 weeks. The reason I always eat shit is because that's all my mom buys. She doesn't really care about what she looks like or how healthy she is. She doesn't need to, she's already married.

It's hard not to eat shit when all there is in the house is frozen pizzas and burritos, hot pockets, and canned ravioli.

I tried diets and workout plans for awhile. Atleast 30 minutes every other day, and watching what I eat. Three meals a day, only water if I'm thirsty, not desserts or sweets of any kind. But it just got boring. If I'm not excited about something the chances of me continuing with it are slim. It was hard for me to be in my basement alone working out. I was thinking I need to be around people while I'm working out, maybe get my motivation up or something. I've been going around applying places so I can get money and maybe join a gym. It's expensive though, and I don't have a car.

The problem is approaching which I explained.

Anways yes if you broke your ankle I am sure you were not very active for the time that it heal'd and you gained weight.

This is why skating to me isn't a good thing to participate in if you try to take it to fast and hurt yourself.

I would suggest just going on some basic walks to drop weight and relieve some of the pressure off of your knees.

Then I would suggest after you drop a few pounds to start some jump roping which is easier then running. Lift some weights to help the tendants heal and strengthen up a bit.

quote:Originally posted by Schraff:

Hook up with Lazy Jayne. Ah, TOTSE, bringing lonely people together...

But seriously, get into shape. I'm doing the South Beach diet and an hour of cardio a day. I've already lost over fifteen pounds. I was cleaning up my old room and came across some pictures of me from a few years ago. My first thought was, "Damn, I was so fat back then..."

It's a good feeling. I'm at an age where most of my friends are starting to gain weight, and I'm in the opposite camp

***edited for grammar

***edited for additional tip: One of the reasons I was such a fatass back in the day was I HATED team sports. I'm a perfectionist; I tend to freak out if I feel like the team would be doing better if I suddenly had a heart attack and died. I don't know if you have the same problem, but if you do, I recommend noncompetitive excercise, like walking, weight training, and swimming. Swimming is good because it touches on all the major muscle groups.



Ok heres the scoop. Im 6 6 and 240 lbs, i dont like to take off my shirt, I love my clothes, its not the im uncomfortable its just i like my clothes. I have a nice active sex life. im not liek fat but im not liek small. i figure if i wsa any lighter i would look like a freak i mean at 6'6" you cant be to skinny.

but 290 lbs thats crazy. umm yeah so lose weight. thats my best advise.

edit: what wrong with jane I think shes pretty sexy. id hook up with her.

[This message has been edited by bushy (edited 03-22-2004).]

quote:Originally posted by PaperSwansAreFun:

I don't play any sports because of physical problems. I used to skateboard when I was younger, and fucked both my knees up and broke my right ankle like 3 times.

*wince* Jeez. In that case, I *definitely* suggest low-impact exercize. I used to jog a lot until my nursing-school friend convinced me that the vast majority of people who jog/run have joint problems later in life, *much* more so than powerwalkers.

If you're near a gym, I recommend eliptical machines. Those kick ASS! All the calorie-burning power of a treadmill with less stress on the joints! And swimming rocks, too.

I feel exactly what your saying. I used to weigh 280 lbs at 6'2" Until I started wrestling at a gym near where I lived.

Then after about 7 months I dropped around 50 lbs. Now I box and have been boxing for awhile. I plateau'd out a bit and am about to start getting back on track.

It's not a bad thing to eat some sweets every now and then and it's normal if you get bored with it then you won't continue doing it.

My mom is the same way but, it's not excuse for her to be unfit. I mean that is why america is the number one country for the most overweight people. Try and talk her into working out with you or go to the grocery store to buy the things you want to eat. This is what I had to do before I got a car and a job and now can buy whatever I want.

quote:Originally posted by aloneandbroken:

I didnt bother to read the other responses, so sorry if I am just reposting things. But how are you fat? are you like wide, offensive line style? Or do you just have rolls? The big buff guys are sexy. But i also know a guy who's maybe 5'5 and 350 lbs. and he gets more than he should.

I'm kind of fat both ways. I'm tall so it evens it out a bit and I don't look as fat as I should. My belly hangs past my belt a bit. My rolls show when I bend over or lean to one side, and if I continue to gain more weight, I'm going to be looking in the bra section.

I'm not very muscular. I'm more muscular in winter time, because that's when I have to head up and chop wood for the fire. But summer time I pork out again and my muscle goes away. No one has seen me with my shirt off in 3 years, because they will make fun of me. I'd rather just avoid all that. Not worthing fighting someone over my problems.

If your dick is proportional to the rest of your body, show it to them and they will follow. Hopefully.

you mean a chode!?!??!?! i dont kno how that will help

You're big and chop up wood for the fire place? I want to marry you, Mr. Amature Lumberjack. Please tell me you wear flannel...

If you need a low impact sport, try swimming. Its a good sport for those who need to do exersize with little to no stress on the knees.

quote:Originally posted by aloneandbroken:

You're big and chop up wood for the fire place? I want to marry you, Mr. Amature Lumberjack. Please tell me you wear flannel...

If you need a low impact sport, try swimming. Its a good sport for those who need to do exersize with little to no stress on the knees.

It's not like I choose to split logs for 6-8 hours straight in the winter. It's just my dad usually works, and my brother is a lazy shit who uses school as an excuse to not do work, even though he JUST got his high school diploma (he just turned 20) and still lives with my parents, rent-free. And he's not even a full-time student! Lazy ass...

And yes, actually, I do wear flannel. Why? Well, because it's warmer than the Devil's asshole, it was $10, and I look dead sexy in it.

Swimming is not an option, because the only place around here with a pool is Johnson Park (Johnson's Wax. Heard of it?). They only allow people who work at Johnson's Wax in there. I suppose I could go in Lake Michigan, but I'd probably get AIDs or some type of skin cancer. Seriously.

Don't bother with swimming; it's actually not that effective as far as cardio goes. How about plain ol' walking?

The reality is that some people, male and female alike, don't "come into their element" until after high school. It's rough and depressing to see others get theirs, and you can't help but think "why not me? What's wrong with me"?

Well, nothing's wrong. High school is a perverse, self-esteem-destroying arena where limited variations are allowed and accepted. I saw it from both points of view: as a freshman and sophomore I was not in the popular crowd and was a "geek". Then a high school closed in our district, and a bunch of us got moved to another high school, where I was suddenly the bees knees. Who knows why.

You might consider the type of females you seek friendship with. Perhaps if you expand your preferences (beyond the "cute ones with boyfriends") you'll find someone.

i have never thought of it that way, i just think of it as im a normal person and everyone else is crazy, i just need to find another normal person.

I wasn't being mean about the flannel/log splitting..It really is pretty sexy...very cool. I am impressed.

My advise is not to worry about it. Your 16 years old, it will come. My first girlfriend was 15, then another at 17, then none till I was 22. I was really freaked out that I was going to die alone (not rational I know), But I have now had a girlfriend for almost 2 years.

About looking for girls at parties, all you will get are party girls, whose primary goal is to get drunk and have fun. They don't necessary want a boyfriend, mainly someone who is funny and can drink a lot.

im not going to read all that touchy feely bullshit. you are fat and ugly and girls dont like fat, ugly guys. lose some fucking weight and maybe youll get laid.

To get hot chicks you have to sorta be an ass to them

You can get fat chicks by just being nice to them, they like it; that is if you can be satisfied with that.

Swimming doesnt make you lose weight actually you gain weight from swimming i should know cause my friend tried that alternative it didnt work out so well

[This message has been edited by Jackel003 (edited 03-23-2004).]

if you're serious about losing the weight having nothing but junk food in your house is a shite excuse for not eating right. I don't pretend to know your mom but i'm going to go out on a limb and say that if you asked her she would probably buy you some healthy food. Fruits, veggies, crackers, what have you. Most food like that is a lot cheaper than canned ravioli and all that frozen shit anyway so she'd be saving a chunk of cash too, and i've never known anyone opposed to that.

So far as working out goes you can get an evil cardiovascular workout without an expensive gym membership or any equipment at all. Although a small set of freeweights is good to have, and usually pretty cheap at places like K-Mart/Wal-Mart. Set aside an hour each day and do a body circuit. Start out easy, do 25 upper body crunches, 25 lower body (lay on your back in the sit-up position pull your knees up till they hit your upper chest then swing them down and away and tap your heels against the floor, if it starts to hurt you're doing it right), 25 left and 25 right ab crunches (lay on your back with your legs out straight, cross right leg over your left nd put your foot next to your knee then put your right hand behind your head and touch your elbow to your knee, then do it for your left side it'll hurt if you do it right). After that do 25 push-ups. Then get a watch and a wall and do 2 minutes of wall sit (put your back up against the wall and go into a sitting position with your thighs at a 90 degree angle to your shins, don't put your hands on your shoulders or let them hang at your sides, don't use them to take weight off your legs, keep your legs parallel to the floor, you should be able to put apen on your thigh w/o it rolling off). Then do a 2 minute pushup bridge (lay on your stomach put your hands together and brace your forearms against the floor, use them to elevate yourself of the floow just enough that your back is straight, like you were doing a pushup). Run through that as many times as you can in an hour, as you get stronger increase reps/time for each exercise. You'll lose that fat and replace it with trim muscle. If you can't run i'd advise using an ergometer, or rowing machine, which should be at a local YMCA or a gym if you do get a membership. Ask someone or check the erg website, www.c2.com (http://www.c2.com) to make sure you have the proper form, a big guy like you should be able to burn more than 1000 calories an hour on an erg, while improving your cardiovasicular strength, endurance, and working all your major muscle groups.

I type too much, get crackin'

[This message has been edited by The Misfit (edited 03-23-2004).]

motherfucker...i can't edit for shite cause i'm wetahded.

the website is www.concept2.com (http://www.concept2.com)

didnt read all the posts on this topic.. just a few, so this may have been covered, but anyway. about losing weight.. a friend of mine has lost a damn lot of weight by drinking TONS of water and eating around 6 or before.. thats dinner.. so no meals after 6.. giver ur food time to digest and everything, and run a mile or two every afternoon ( or if youve got the drive every morning before school.. morning=best time to run for losing weight) so yeah, his schedule is eat three meals a day, try and keep it healthy and out of carbs, come home have a cat meal *salad* something light.. then run and eat or.. eat and run.. not sure, but hes a big guy so gradually running will get easier, but you must push yourself or nothing is accomplished.

First off- Schraff, are you trying to get me arrested? The poor boy is jail-bait.

Next- Just because you have junk food doesn't mean you have to eat it, and not all healthy stuff tastes like crap. If you don't want to gain anymore weight, don't eat when you're bored. Eat slowly, and have things that are slower to digest. Oatmeal for breakfast, etc. walking, as others have said, is good excersize, also riding a bike. If you don't want to just walk for no reason, grab a backpack, and go for a hike, or go mountain biking. This obviously depends on where you live.

If you find something that you like doing, that just happens to be healthy, you forget it's excersize.

Also- most women <girls> like taller men. I don't know why, we just do. Some women <girls> like heavier men- not always muscley ones. There's something about a cudly guy that does something for them.

Basically- if you are happy with how you look, there will be a girl that likes it. Oh, and learn to like being really tall. If you're uncomfortable with it... your life will be hell. There are clubs for tall people- you might look into joining one... although you may have to wait untill you're 18. End of Book

j.

First of FAT is not the primary problem. Being the nicest guy you know is. You won't get a girlfriend if you're only nice. Nice doesn't develop interest and nice will only make you friends with girls. And fine, you're fat, instead of being nice get in fights it's a good work out, being a big guy like you are you probably wouldn't get that hurt.

For me, 6'4 200, and trying to gain more muscle weight. I row,eat, sex, sleep.