Ok I saw how a lot of people complaining how they never got laid or anything. Maybe i can help out and give some secrets to everyone. Now before i start, plz dont give me shit about me thinking im some big pimp or something.

eL_TuRKo's Guide To Being a PlaYA

STEP 1: Picking Up

Now this part is the hardest part u will come across, the rest is coming soon.

(Note: My definition of slut is atleast someone that will give head or have sex very early in the relationship)

Now here are some tips:

- Dont try this if u get attached easily.

- Dont try this if u got morals, lol

- And have a lot of patience

Ok now u can pretty much seduce nearly any girl. From sluts and bitches to good girls and church girls. And I STRONGLY suggest u just play the dumb chicks, bitches, sluts etc. Get the ones that deserve it. DOnt go and play the good girls that have never had a bf and virgins etc. Cos thats just really mean and they dont deserve it.

Now the sluttier and the dumber the chick is the easier u can play them.

OK Now that we got the general rules in place lets get down to buisness.

Now remember this sort of shit requires a lot of patience but in the end the reward is good.

First thing is first, pick up a girl. This is probably the hardest part, after this its all easy.

Best places to find girls:

Nightclubs/Bars: Now chicks either come here to pick up or come with their boyfriends. And nearly all of them are sluts. About 99% of them will put out. So just look nice for the girls and go approach some of the girls. Just go and talk to them. Some u gotta watch out. Some will be dumb drunk sluts taht will will fuck if u go up to them and ask for a root. those are the easy ones to pick up. And then u got stuck up sluts that go for "bad boys" best way to pick them up is to have a group of boys. And usually u dont be nice to them. If they snob u off, then the best chance u will have to hook up with them is pretty much do the same. And then there are the chicks u gotta work for. For these chicks u gotta be yourself. Dont act hard or anything, just urself and be nice to them, talk a lot of shit and try and get their number.



Parties: Here u find a lot of drunk sluts that go and fuck guys. Here it will be real easy to get a one night stand and to pick up. If u find a one night stand here, try and get their number if u find chicks taht dont put out, then do ur shit talking and pick them up.

Through friends: Or if u got freinds that know chicks, then they can hook up up with them.

Friend's Ex: Now a lot of friendship groups have this rule where if one of the boys went out with them then none of the friends can touch. FORGET ABOUT THIS RULE. Bitches come and go. A friend's ex is a good way to pick up.



Shopping centres: Get a friend or two, go around a shopping centre, and start talking to chicks and try and pick up. Now this is very hard and the failure rate is really high, even if u are a really good chick chatter-upper. Easist chicks to pick up here at the high school chicks that hang around there. Just be careful at shopping that they dont have much guy friends around. Or else u might be up for fight, the best way to go about this is to have a big group and tehn people will be scared to start fights with u, but when u have a big group then the chicks usually get scared.

Schools/University/etc: Find a girl, and ask them out, OR, just start talking to one and after a while ask them out.

Internet: By far the easist way to pick up. Talk to them us the all famous pick up line "asl", do some shit talking. Even if ur an ugly cunt u will pick up. Get their number and start talking to them on the phone and then after a while meet up with them. If they are sluts they would want to meet up with u pretty quickly. Most of the time the girl will get attached to u before they even meet u.

Now with the shit talking, u gotta let the girls here wat the want to hear, act all nice and shit, just play along with them.

Now that you've got a girl the rest is easy. This is the hardest step you will face in the road to being a playa.

This is end of Part 1: Picking Up

Stay in Tune for Part 2: Manipulation

And also Part 3: Disposal

eL_TuRKo's GuiDe To BeiNG a PLaYa Copyright 2004

You see a lot of people complaining and you just signed up today?

yeah i signed up today

But yet you have seen many people complain about not getting laid on Totse...

quote:Originally posted by eL_TuRKo:

yeah i signed up today

It was a rhetorical question.

quote:Originally posted by bilzo:

But yet you have seen many people complain about not getting laid on Totse...

ok i didnt see many, i saw some people when i was looking throught the forums. Im not saying anything that people arent getting laid or anything, i just thought i'd post some words of wisdom, to share with everyone.

eL_turko is retarted.

bushy sucks dick

so....

so keep sucking dick and shut up

how old r u?

20

u?

i know your not 20

lol u dont know shit

lol ur an idiot

i dont care if u dont believe me

Hey, el twato, alt caps are gay.

quote:Originally posted by DeAtHsTyLe:

Hey, el twato, alt caps are gay.

yeah and so are u

quote:Originally posted by eL_TuRKo:

lol u dont know shit

lol ur an idiot

i dont care if u dont believe me

Using "lol" twice in a post is grounds for automatic execution.

that proves your not 20 cause 20 yos dont use lol in forums

quote:Originally posted by bushy:

that proves your not 20 cause 20 yos dont use lol in forums

ur a dumb fuck

you have room to talk. dont post comon sence shit. if we all wanted stupid whores then we could all get them, but this is a sex and AFFECTION fourm that means we usualy want substance in our realtion ships.

at least i dont try to pick up whores.

quote:Originally posted by bushy:

you have room to talk. dont post comon sence shit. if we all wanted stupid whores then we could all get them, but this is a sex and AFFECTION fourm that means we usualy want substance in our realtion ships.

at least i dont try to pick up whores.

yes and its also a SEX forum

Ah, welcome to totse...

CINDY please close this!!!!! it makes me want to cry.

quote:Originally posted by eL_TuRKo:

Originally posted by bushy:

you have room to talk. dont post comon sence shit. if we all wanted stupid whores then we could all get them, but this is a sex and AFFECTION fourm that means we usualy want substance in our realtion ships.

at least i dont try to pick up whores.

yes and its also a SEX forum





umm yes but if you look to your right it says sex AND affection which probably means posting things with SUBSTANCE. not how to "play" women that are nasty skany dumb whores

quote:The truth posted by eL_TuRKo:

I realise that I am a 12 year old attention seeking whore. And my inane posts disrupt the natural flow of the forum. But I have tried to be accepted so much in the real world (and failed) that the internet seemed my only hope for a social life. So I made up an online personality based on stereotypes and shit i have seen on tv. I have now seen there is no hope for me and I now know the only solution is suicide.

Thats ok we know you are a loser. Now its time to follow though with your plan of ending it.

quote:Originally posted by proofisoutthere:

Thats ok we know you are a loser. Now its time to follow though with your plan of ending it.



are u trying to be funny here or something, making up all this fake shit. fukin sad cunt

quote:Originally posted by eL_TuRKo:

yeah and so are u

Hardheaded. Best thing I can say about you.

Why the fuck do you allways whine to Cindy? Do you not think she has slightly better things to tend to, other than answering your constant bitchings? Making a sammich for me is one of the things she could be doing that's much more important than tending to you.

quote:Originally posted by eL_TuRKo:

are u trying to be funny here or something, making up all this fake shit. fukin sad cunt

LMAO ROFL good one tutok way to get him where it hurts.

asshat

quote:Originally posted by N6193J:

Why the fuck do you allways whine to Cindy? Do you not think she has slightly better things to tend to, other than answering your constant bitchings? Making a sammich for me is one of the things she could be doing that's much more important than tending to you.

hey asshole i wast whining, i was merely stating that this should be closed. its just cindy is my fav mod. i dotn care is she pays attention to it.

Yes, you were whining. Seem sthat most posts you don't like, you whine to Cindy to come lock it.

hey bushy are u some sort of softcock or something, i mean ur complaining about this topic and this and that, fark if it offends u so much then dont fukin read it, and if this sort of shit makes u cry like u said before, then wat the fuk are u doing on a site like this, for fucks site, the whole site is full of this sort of shit, no offence to the site, i love it . but take a look, if ur in a site like this, then expect this sort of shit, why the fuk did u even join the messageboard. the site is full of ideas on how toscam people how to make weapons to kill and drugs and everything, ur a fukin dumb cunt hypocrit

quote:Originally posted by N6193J:

Yes, you were whining. Seem sthat most posts you don't like, you whine to Cindy to come lock it.



2 times and thats cause they dont belong here

im sure in your 1 day you have seen the whole site. its just i saw that you couldnt spell worth shit and dont know hot to use caps right and i got enraged. just close it, no one likes you

quote:Originally posted by bushy:



2 times and thats cause they dont belong here

the only person that doesnt belong here is u. if ur getting upset about shit like this tehn get out of here, go join some fukin some fukin barbie messageboard or something

Come on man, you're making me look bad. If you want anyone to atleast side with you, learn to spell.

quote:Originally posted by eL_TuRKo:

hey bushy are u some sort of softcock or something, i mean ur complaining about this topic and this and that, fark if it offends u so much then dont fukin read it, and if this sort of shit makes u cry like u said before, then wat the fuk are u doing on a site like this, for fucks site, the whole site is full of this sort of shit, no offence to the site, i love it . but take a look, if ur in a site like this, then expect this sort of shit, why the fuk did u even join the messageboard. the site is full of ideas on how toscam people how to make weapons to kill and drugs and everything, ur a fukin dumb cunt hypocrit

Where are the grammer whores at ?

ummm yeah rite, you know what you arent worth my time and effort. its just your so stupid its entertaning. like that movie where the monkey pisses in his mouth

quote:Originally posted by bushy:

im sure in your 1 day you have seen the whole site. its just i saw that you couldnt spell worth shit and dont know hot to use caps right and i got enraged. just close it, no one likes you

omg u fuck wit, who said i saw the whole site in 1 day, i always visited this site heaps, i just joined the messageboards today, fukin dumb cunt, oh and im sorry about my spelling, sorry it couldnt meet ur net/geek/nerd/fukwitted standards, dickhead

quote:Originally posted by bushy:

ummm yeah rite, you know what you arent worth my time and effort. its just your so stupid its entertaning. like that movie where the monkey pisses in his mouth

yeah u like to see monkeys piss in their mouths dont ya, it turns u on huh?

quote:Originally posted by eL_TuRKo:

hey bushy are u some sort of softcock or something, i mean ur complaining about this topic and this and that, fark if it offends u so much then dont fukin read it, and if this sort of shit makes u cry like u said before, then wat the fuk are u doing on a site like this, for fucks site, the whole site is full of this sort of shit, no offence to the site, i love it . but take a look, if ur in a site like this, then expect this sort of shit, why the fuk did u even join the messageboard. the site is full of ideas on how to scam people how to make weapons to kill and drugs and everything, ur a fukin dumb cunt hypocrit

look at the BOLD

and scaming people and making weapons is diffrent than posting shit about picking up whores, those are useful, you jsut asume that we all are lifeless bums who dont get action , thats totaly wrong. you acted like you were a savior trying to get everyone laid. FUCK OFf

quote:Originally posted by bushy:

look at the BOLD

and scaming people and making weapons is diffrent than posting shit about picking up whores, those are useful, you jsut asume that we all are lifeless bums who dont get action , thats totaly wrong. you acted like you were a savior trying to get everyone laid. FUCK OFf

i never assumed shit. i just decided to post a thing or two, why do u get offended so much, maybe YOU are a lifeless bumb so maybe ur getting offended by it.

When the sites post shit does it assume that everybody doesnt know about it?

anyway we'll continue this later i gotta go now

if you want to know, i have "gfs" ( not serious) throughout my highschool life ( im a senior) I have gotten laid on anumber of ocasions, although i enjoy oral sex way more. I have amazing oral skills, and I have made 3 girls squirt, i have 2 girls virginity, and im only pissed cause you should hang out more and get a feel for totse before posting useless crap.

quote:Originally posted by bushy:

if you want to know, i have "gfs" ( not serious) throughout my highschool life ( im a senior) I have gotten laid on anumber of ocasions, although i enjoy oral sex way more. I have amazing oral skills, and I have made 3 girls squirt, i have 2 girls virginity, and im only pissed cause you should hang out more and get a feel for totse before posting useless crap.

well i guess this is settled then, maybe next time u should have said that before calling me retarded