I'll Try to make this brief. yeah.. Right.

I've been dating this boy for almost three months. I'm 18, hes turning 18 in April, and we're both seniors in highschool. Everything has been going great. We get along, we have passion, we have tons in common, and my family even likes him. Heres where my problem starts...

With college starting in september we're obviously going to have to break up. Some people choose to stay together but I've seen that fall apart way too many times, and neither of us wants that. We're quite sure that we want to be together until september, and possibly get together when we're done with college, but when the school year starts our relationship ends.

Asside from knowing exactly when my relationship is ending (creepy in itself) theres the issue of sex. I've been with one other person, hes a virgin. We both love each other, and we both want to, but at the same time I have some doubts. I'm just wondering if that will make it that much harder on me when september rolls around. Thus far we've fooled around a little, but sex means alot to me, and I know that if we start that I'm going to become fairly Involved.

Some would say to go for it, you only live once, better to have loved and lost.. Yadda yadda, I hear ya... At the same time I don't want to get so close to this boy that we won't be able to end the relationship civily. I want to be able to stay friends with him without writhing in pain that hes not mine anymore.

So thats it, I'm feeling the struggle between falling deeper in love with him and starting an even more serious relationship, or staying a little more distant and keeping things lighter. I'm leaning towards the first one, but to be honest I'm feeling a little chicken shit, lol. Is it stupid to be afraid of letting yourself care about someone so much?

Love to hear any advice you might have, and thanks for reading.

-Sea

Oh my. That's a tough one.

If it were me with my "knowing what I know now" hindsight, I'd end the relationship as it stands now, and remain friendly. With the mature outlook you both have on how this will all wind down eventually, it's unlikely either of you will get deeply involved with others.

On the other hand, you're young and life is for living and learning! So you might choose to let yourself go, enjoy the sex and the relationship while you can, and deal bravely with the breakup. Besides, you never know what will happen. The two of you may become so bonded that when summer rolls around, breaking up will be unthinkable and you'll be that rare couple that makes it long-distance.

Plus, since you never know what can happen in life, one of you might get hit by a bus next week and that will be that.

I'm sure you'll make the choice that's best for you. Good luck!

Thanks for the reply. I'll continue to think about it, theres no rush, but seeing that tonight I'm sleeping in a sweatshirt of his because I love the smell of him so much... Well yeah, I can't help but think that letting myself just go for it and be totally in love would be quite enjoyable if a little foolhardy. Thanks again..



More replies are welcome.

I say go for it. If you guys love each other do what comes natural and let things go from there. Worry about it when it happens. True love is so hard to find in this world that you should cling to it as long as you possibly can.

But that's just my opinion.

Think about all the things that people have done in this world when they knew that the consequences of their actions were going to be awful to endure (or, in the case of soldiers, that they would probably die). If none of those people ever did it for fear of what would come, where would we be today?

It may be a mistake, but you owe it to yourself to find out for sure.

Thanks for the replies. What a lucky girl, I had my question answered by three of the big guns before I got anything stupid or inane. Of course I've just jinxed it, but I've already heard what I needed to ;)

I've come to the conclusion that you're right, I am young, and theres no better time to enjoy something this good if I've been lucky enough to find it. Theres no guarantee that I'll even be alive in september to feel pain over the break up, heh, and even if I am, if this Is love then its surely worth it.

And... for the sake of the argument lets say that it isn't; it's still free, passionate, sweet, very enjoyable, and what with the future cardio benefits, even good for my health. Thanks for the nudge.

-Sea