Ok, you people know that I post two types of topics here. Humorus or whiney posts of no importance, and the post that is deadly serious.

Unfortunatly, this is going to be the latter.

This girl's been hanging around the house, more or less hiding from her psycho ex untill the cops find him.

Not off to a good start, I know.

By now you must of guessed that this girl is the object of my affection. Ok, I've only realy gotten to know her over the past week or so that she's been hanging out. But we've had these amazing talks that just go on for hours and hours.

So I meet an inteligent beautiful girl who I can talk to. There has to be a problem. And that problem is that she has a thing for my brother.

That's right, my brother. My younger brother.

Now, I have the strong suspicion that that has a lot to do with the fact that all her previous relationships were with the type of guys that give the rest of us a bad name. Compared to them, my brother must look pretty good. And she has known him a bit longer than has known me.

To compound matters, after hanging out with her for a while, my brother realized how self-centered his girlfriend is, and dumped her last night. At least that's his story. Despite his evidence supporting that version of reality, I think it also has to do with him having a thing for this girl.

Now, on several occasions in the past I've been two chicken to step up to the plate when I liked someone, and I regret each and every time. I know if I don't at least try I'll be kicking myself the rest of my life for not trying.

That's the situation. Sucks huh? Now, I want to approach her, but I don't know if it's the right thing to do. If by some maricle she does like me, will that cause resentment from my brother? Or if she rejects me horribly, and ends up with him, will it be too akward to be around them? Or should I just do nothing, and have the weight of not knowing sit on me in hopes that it's the best option?

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Heather just came down to use the bathroom. On her way back upstairs I stopped her for a short chat. It was just while typing this that I thought about the possiblity of her latching onto him because he's not scum. While I can't remember our conversation verbatem, I do beleive that I got that concept across. Amongst other stuff like "You're both in a pretty hairy place relationshipwise", "You should probably wait for the dust to settle", and "My brother's not the only guy that's not going to beat you and steal from you".

So it's pretty ugly. Help would be much appreciated.

This is one of those situations that you just have to untie the string and let your balls down, get em flowin straight to the ground. When it comes to chicks you just have to say shit that makes you feel stupid sometimes when you don't think you can. No amount of embarrassment or rejection will compare to the feel of defeat knowing that you didn't do everything possible to prevent it.

you gotta make a move...she aint gonna come to you...your brother looks likes the front runner so do it...all she can do is say no...

Depending upon how close you are to your brother, you may want to talk to him. Tell him, first, how you feel for the lady and ask him if he'd do a really noble thing for his big brother (let you have her; or rather, try to have her). Or, you can find out for sure how your bro feels by talking to him casually; I'm sure you have skills enough to fish around like that.

I'm not sure, though, man; I mean, things are always easier said than done. I just wish I could help more. Good luck, though, and I hope the wind blows your way..or something. Heh.

-Infrared

Infrared's advice is good. Talk to your brother. I'm sure that he knows your relationship trouble, and unless his is crazily in love with this girl will take one for the team and then let you give it a shot. I am sure you are right in thinking that he likes her, but if he's a good guy he'll do the good thing.

Until it's cleared with your brother, don't make any moves on this girl. As much as I want to tell you to go for it, because you seem like such a good guy and you deserve the girl you want, dont. However, don't just do nothing until he says okay. You can keep proving to her that YOU are just as good of a guy, and not the kind of guy who'd hurt her. Be genuine, keep being friendly, open/hold doors, just plain be polite. She will see the good in you. Make sure to keep these good intellectual conversations going. If she is an intelligent girl, chances are she loves your mind. That will be a big key in getting to her.

Good luck. I really hope you get this girl.

How's your relationship with your brother? If there have ever been competitive tendencies, talking with him might backfire.

Concentrate your efforts on being the best "you" you can be. Don't put yourself down and don't talk in puzzles ("my brother isn't the only one who won't...") Don't compare yourself to your brother or anyone else. I've seen women put off more by guys who put another guy down, so don't knock others.

Speak up, and speak directly. Sounds like you want to do this soon, too!

There's always been some friction with my brother. But our intrests are so different there's never really been competition between us. I read the latest Discover while he goes and dislocates his joints biking.

Besides, I've come to the inevitable conclusion that I have some sort of previously unrecognized brain damage for even contemplating it.

quote:Originally posted by Prometheus:

There's always been some friction with my brother. But our intrests are so different there's never really been competition between us. I read the latest Discover while he goes and dislocates his joints biking.

Besides, I've come to the inevitable conclusion that I have some sort of previously unrecognized brain damage for even contemplating it.

Have faith. Just spend more time with her, and she'll come around to you...

Yeah. He's fucking her and I sleep with headphones on. I'm also taking lots and lots of Xanax.