This is long, but its the only way to tell what happened.

If you wanna flame me, fuck you. I dont give a fuck anymore. I have not slept in 24 fucking hours because of all thats been happening with Christina, her dad and me. That would have not been unusual over a month ago, but without tweek, i noticed how fucking weird it makes you feel, and its NOT pleasant. I wish i had a bottle of sleeping pills, because i would eat all of that motherfucker in a second.

Your probably wondering what the hell is wrong on with me (or your laughing, if so, fuck you), so ill tell you. The only reason im posting this is because i have no idea what to do.

Yesterday, Christina called me, fucking hysterical and crying, telling me she needed to see me. I told her "Ok, meet me down your street (because i still havent gotten that drug test to prove her dad im not on that shit anymore, but thats changed indefinitely)" So she did, i picked her up, and she told me right off the bat that she was going to show me something, and she didn’t want me to freak out. Not knowing what she was talking about, i agreed i wouldint. So she pulled up her sleeves to show me these HUGE fucking cuts on her lower forearm, but they werent bleeding.

i was thinking "Holy fuck", but I told her that she needed to go to the E.R., but she went totally fucking nuts, saying that she would kill herself if i tried, and pulled out her switchblade (the same one i gave her...). I tried to keep calm, but my voice wasint. I remember clearly saying "OK Cris, calm down. Please." She then mumbled something, and started sobbing and put the kife to her wrist. About this time i couldint keep my eyes on the road so i pulld to the side and went "your scaring the shit out me cris, Dont do this."

Finally, she looked at me. i went "Chris... i dont know whats going on, but you cant do this. Please, give me the knife". After whet seemed like an eternity, she finally gave in and handed it to me and I put it in my pocket (where it still is right now).

She finally told me what happened. She was arguing with her dad (she never told me what about, and i didnt ask) and it got heated. After a while, her dad went outside to cool off, but Christina fallowed him. Then, she was in mid sentence, when he turned around and HIT her. She then shown me the clear impression of knuckles. I guess his fuckin stinky spic must have realized he maybe hit a little too hard, and tried to apologize. Then, she went to her room, CUT HER FOREARMS, and just sat there, doctoring it with a shirt, when it stopped bleeding, she called me.

I still wanted to take her to the hospital, because i didint want the wounds to get infected, but i was so distraught/angry at her dad, i decided to take her to my place until she calmed down.

When we got to my house, i told her that we need to clean those cuts, and she agreed. So, i "Ghetto sanitized" it with Alcohol, peroxide and water and taped gauze on them. I told her that she still needed to go to the hospital, but she still refused. My anger i felt on those week meth binges started coming back ten-fold, all directed at her dad. Who the fuck does he think he is? Falsely accusing me of still being a meth head, while that fucking Mexican spic goes off and beats the shit out of his own flesh and blood. By this time, 2 hours passed after the incident, and the welts made by his knuckles REALLY started to show up, even more than it did in the car. I thought about putting my late dads shotgun to good use, but i had more control than that (sadly, if i was still on meth, i probably would have loaded it without thinking twice).

30 minutes later, i was playing my guitar with her by my side, when i heard the doorbell ring. i yelled for my sis to get the door (because im a lazy bastard :P ), and a few seconds later, she came up and told us that Christinas dads at the door. Ohh... bad choice. I walked out of my room, totally PISSED, straight to the door, ready to throw down if the time calls. I opened it, and there was his stupid spic ass. It still pisses me off thinking about it. I walked outside, forcing him to take 3 steps back. I wrote it all down, so i can remeber EVERY word that was said. Here what is was like(remember, i was livid for good reason):

"What do you want?"

"Wheres my daughter?"

"Here, so what?"

"She’s going home with me, no questions Jake"

"Why? so you can beat the fuck out of her again?!"

"Jake, christina sometimes puts marks on herself to ge-"

"NO! NO! BULLSHIT! Dont even try to lie you fuckin spic!"

"LISTEN! Christina does this when she wants attention. I dont know what she told you-"

"So she put the welts that perfetly align with kuckles on her own face huh?"

"Jake, i dont want to argue or fight you. You either let us take our daughter home, or ill call the police"

"Then call them, lets see who they believe!"

Then i walked back in and slammed the door. Who the FUCK did he think he was fooling? Trying to lie saying my girl does that for attention. BULL-FUCKING-SHIT! Christina then came down the stairs with her jacket on, and said she better go. I went "You dont have to go anywhere with that bastard. Let him call the police, you could tell them what happened. Their not gonna believe him." I was forgetting that, with my rap sheet, they would think I DID it. She said "no, you dont need them around anymore Jake, your ein enough shit already. Ill call you tomorrow, ok?" "...ok" i said reluctantly/ still pissed. I watched her leave with the pile of shit thats her dad, and when they left, it was on. I locked myself in my room, and started throwing shit. CD cases, Cassettes, It didint matter. i had to find some way to release my anger.

After breaking about 4 CD cases and my "Seasons of the Abyss" cassette, i finally sat down, and thought of what happened. I tried to sleep last night, but couldint. My girl gets hit by her dad, cuts herself, calls me, attempts suicide in my car, then her dad comes over and tries to lie his way out of it. The events just kept repeating over and over in my head.

I cant go to the police because they will never believe me. I cant ask for my friends advice, because they never been in this situation before. I cant tell my therapist, because shes obligated to report any domestic abuse, and i dont want cops involved with my record.

I- god, im confused about what i should do. I used to have all the answers, i used to be the one that could make quick, wise desisions, excusing some occasional lapse's of judgement, now...i...

I dont know what the fuck to do anymore.

Is this the first time he's gotten physical with her? I don't think the cops would think you did it if anyone else could vouch for him being a violent person. Also, you should really try to get Christina some help. It's serious ANYTIME someone gets suicidal.

If you would have taken her to the hospital they probably would have had some type of counselor for her to talk to, but I'm not sure.

What exactly is on your rapsheet that would lead police to believe that you would hurt your girlfriend? Have YOU ever been violent towards her?

quote:Originally posted by ChubZero:



What exactly is on your rapsheet that would lead police to believe that you would hurt your girlfriend? Have YOU ever been violent towards her?

ABSOLUTLEY NOT!

I have NEVER layed a hand on her, what i was talking about was my prior arrest, for Aggervated Assault and battery (i spent time in juvie for the assault). Her dad is squeaky clean.

I dont know if this is the first time or not, but its the first thime she told me about it.

This strikes me as one of those situations with no solution. I'm posting this not to be un-helpful, but to encourage you to focus your energies away from a futile situation.

You don't know what to do because there's nothing you can do. You don't have the upper hand and any agency that might be able to mediate will not look favorably upon you or Cristina in this case. She's an "attention-seeking cutter" and you're a "violent meth-head with priors" in the eyes of the law, medical professionals and social services agencies. There might be social services that will listen to you and sympathize, but chances are you'll still be clumped with the larger statistical group that fits the above description.

Like it or not, the law/medical/social services people make judgements on appearance and behavior. If you're raving like an angry lunatic (and you have every right to be) and Cristina's father is able to remain calm and rational, you're screwed.

Essentially, your only option is to move far, far away with Cristina, or deal with whatever happens as it happens if you choose to stay with her. I presume you're both minors.

As much as it seems justified, don't snap and commit homocide. You're better off running away with her than ending up on death row. Hopefully that's a no-brainer for you.

I know people who do all kinds of drugs and are able to function just fine. You may not be one of those kinds of people, so you might reconsider your use, if you ever want to be taken seriously and treated with respect. Referring to someone as a "spic" (doesn't that make Cristina a "spic" as well, unless she was adopted?) is indicative of a behavioral pattern that doesn't work in your favor.

So, in summary, if you want Cristina in your life, it will probably take the following: get yourself into a treatment program, help Cristina seek counseling, and continue with your own counseling. Eventually the problems with her father will come up when you're both more rational-thinking, and you'll likely be taken more seriously if she's truly in an abusive situation.

And to make it clear: I don't think all this is necessarily "right" that you have to suck it up. This is just the way life, and the law, works.