Hey everybody. Um, background. Okay. My ex and I have been apart for about a year now. We were each other's first, so of course she means a lot to me. Today I hear from my best friend that she's apparantly found someone new. This isn't surprising, but it still makes me feel really down.

So I guess I'm posting just to see how other people have dealt with this, and what they did to make themselves feel better about it. Thanks in advance.

Pizza and masturbation both help. I lost my 5th woman a week ago today.

About all you can do is find something to occupy your mind to get it off of her, a hobby or whatnot.. another girl? It takes time, but time does heal. Probably not the words of wisdom you were hoping for but all anyone can offer is encouragement in a case like this so..... good luck.

-Extant

Well, pizza does sound good. Masterbating... hell I've been doing that since we broke up!

If its a year later then Im sorry to say this and all as it seems you do still like her but you need to move on! I know that might be hard as she was your first and all but 1 year on and you still feeling down isnt going to do either of you any good.

Has there been any contact between you in that year like have you all been on off, on off or that kind of thing?

I know that for me with my first I ended up doing the dirty on her with 2 friends of ours and then felt real bad and so I told her and we ended up splitting and though I did want to for that week split with her I regretted it after that one week! We ended up back together a few years later as we were both like you each others firsts and first loves too! I mean when we got back ogether I was so happy as was she but it didnt last too long because of school and all and it was even harder then because I had to go through the split again.

If I was in your siuation I would just try to go out and meet someone else even if its only a friend that you can open up to and talk to them abotu how you are feeling about this!

How long were you with her or was it just that she was your first but it was a one night thing?

If you were with each other for a long time I know it will be hard for you to accept that she has a new b/f but Im sure she would have been thinking the same if she saw you with a new g/f.

I would definatly just try to take my mind off of it for now though and try and meet new people!

I hope thats of some help and all but if not or you have any othr q's just ask and Ill try to be helpful as I said I know the feeling as I think alot of us do!

quote:Originally posted by Extant:

About all you can do is find something to occupy your mind to get it off of her, a hobby or whatnot.. another girl? It takes time, but time does heal. Probably not the words of wisdom you were hoping for but all anyone can offer is encouragement in a case like this so..... good luck.

-Extant

No, those are still great words, Extant. Thanks.

We were together for about a year. After we broke up, we tried to stay in close contact, but that slowly faded to nothing. Yes, I do still have feeling for her. But I think it's only because she was my first. She's got a habit for being a bitch at times.

I know how you feel, I was just introduced to this feeling recently and it's horrible!! horrible horrible... if you live in a remote area stalk the guy and check out what he does... then get out your .50 cal and wait for him.

or you could just decide that sulking isn't going to help and think of the happy things in life. At least you're not retarded (I'm serious) or starving, or stepped on a mine, or got raped when you were 8 or some other shit. Everytime I'm really down I just think of all the people who are so much worse off than me. Think about it...if you think you're lonely think of all those kids at school that sit at the "special" table in their wheelchairs and most likely will never ever get a girlfriend. So just move on, bitch

Good points, Geenie.

Shucks, Ducky, your feelings are pretty appropriate. I still have the rare pang for my first, though it was during the Reagan administration. And I dumped him, rather rudely. But still.

Of course, having someone yourself helps, but even this isn't foolproof unless you care about the "new someone" as much as the old one.

Females eat chocolate to diffuse love pangs. Does this work for guys?

Thanks, cindy. Chocolate does help guys too, but seeing how i'm overwight as it is I may want to limit that option. I talked to my friend some more, and we're going out sometime soon for an all-nighter again. Can't wait to scare those IHOP waitresses at 3 am.

My Ex (still great friend) went out with two guys after me, and both were really bad ideas. One was a navy guy living 2000 miles away that she met once, and one was some track star from across the hall. I told her both times it was a bad idea, and she told me i was wrong. After they broke up, of course, she admitted i'd been right all along. Now she's dating my best friend, and I couldn't be happier.



Peace.