Scenario:

I woke up this morning in the middle of a sex dream, horny as anything, panties wet, the works. I rolled over on top of my guy and started kissing his neck, snuggling etc (this usually gets him hard) but there was very little reaction. He had been awake for awhile, and had even been up and out of bed, but I assumed he was still sleepy so I eventually rolled off and went back to sleep. In my sleep I had an even more intense sex dream and when I woke up 2 hours later I was absolutely craving sex, I mean aching for it.

We both got up out of bed, he went to check email and I went to get some clothes sorted for work, and in passing by the office I mentioned "I'm absolutely craving some sex babe!" to which he responded "Well I'm not in the least bit" in sort of a dream-on tone of voice... which totaly puzzled me because 1. He doesn't tend to turn down sex, and 2. Until then he had been in a really good mood, so the tone of his voice was a bit unexpected.

I don't turn down sex, or requests for sex... I'm always game to give blowjobs or bend over, so he wouldn't hold out on me for that reason.

I asked him if I put the work in did he think I could get him turned on and pleasure him, and he agreed that it was physically possibly for him to enjoy it, but he just didn't feel like it... that it would take a lot of work for me.

Now... *sigh* I'm totaly perplexed, and hopefully you fellas can give me some hints because he was less than ready to explain and I didn't push it.

So just in a general guy's perspective:

Should a chick take that as a "leave me alone" and back off (that's what I did)

Or should she take it as a "if you're willing to put all the effort in, then go for it"?

Words from his own mouth have been:

"guys who say that they aren't in the mood are full of shit"

and:

"if you aren't in the mood you should still do it, because once you start you realize that it's really enjoyable"

By the way, if any trolls pipe up with "you're just a needy bitch who won't leave the poor mistreated guy alone" just zip it. We've been relaxing and sleeping in all weekend, he wasn't worn out, and I didn't beg.

I say come put in the work with me =)

jp....STFU!! Ok...now, Ive had this happen to me a time or three. I usually give in and it turns out just as you stated above. But I would not push the issue. He was obviously upset by something....why I dunno. Probably not anything you did. Unless during your sex dreams you were calling out the name of another. Oh shit!!

But the point is communication. You should've at least asked him what the problem was. That way, he couln't later use the old "well you never asked why I was pissed" line on ya. Ya get it? Good. So uhmmm where did ya say you lived?? ahahaahahah *kidding*

I didnt know girls got wet after a sex dream. Hmm...

Ummm, kay... he turns down the sex.

Not a normal guy... j/k

Actually(yes I am a male) Always wanting sex for a male isnt the truth. Since he turned you down it might be on how much sex you two have had in the past, he might just be getting tired of, lost that spark that was there at one point, or he might just have other things on his mind. Its pretty much the same way for me right now, current girl is looking for sex constantly, it used to be good, now it just doesnt seem the same, like there is no passion. But give it time and things might go back to normal, if not try new ideas to rekindle his interest.

Sarc is going unappreciated. What a bastard.

Just go do little things to him: Kissing his neck, licking his ear. Things along those lines. If you don't get some kind of positive reaction, he must be dead.

whats stopping you from tying him up and fucking him?

if i wasnt in the mood i wouldnt say no to that, if your gonna do the work.

it happens, sometimes even the most horny guy just doenst feel like it (happend to me for the first time ever four weeks ago, biggest shock of my life), it sounds odd, and it is odd, but i'm affraid there's not much you can do about it exept for wait untill it has passed, and it should pass...

if it doesn't , there somethin wrong between the two of you

but since like i hear it that isn't the case, he should be his old self in no time.. just a matter of time

did this ever happen before you moved in with him? as beautiful ,easygoing ,brilliant as i'm sure you are ,you are major league available. nothing wrong there except his basic brain has got you stored as a certainty for gene dispersal. men are programmed to hunt(do not read "are naturally unfaithful). i'm not suggesting you start emotional games or withholding favours, but make sure you regularly attend social ocasions without him and have some personal interests of your own. as unfashionable as these ideas may be i have seen this over and over again. of course men don't want it all the time. but have you noticed this never happens at the beginning of a relationship. more worrying is his offhand manner of dealing with your needs. i know that there is an unwritten law that on the ocaisions one partner gets extroadinarily turned on the other immediately prefers 40 winks, but i don't think you'd be bothering totse just because your man had an offday. if you don't push things and days become weeks and maybe you're just getting some low quality sex i'm afraid it's altogether possible your man is looking for excitement elsewhere.

remember ,however good the sex is if he knows its on offer whenever ,wherever he will lose interest.its biology. let him see you as an individual again.

quote: But I would not push the issue. * [/B]

good to know

[This message has been edited by AlwayzHving2SaySorry (edited 09-29-2003).]

::Carefully steps over all the geek-come::

The truth is not that guys are always in the mood, just that it's very easy to get them there.

I wouldn't attempt to fuck someone if he blatantly turned me down, you run a risk of him getting the "ugh, I can't bear to look at her" syndrome for a while.

(EDIT: blatantly, b l a t a n t l y, blatantly)

[This message has been edited by Sagewisher3 (edited 09-29-2003).]

It sorta depends on age also, I'm guessing a lot of the replies you are getting are from people not in your age range i.e. me (18), so they prolly aren't gonna help, but here is my 2 cents:

A lot of the time it does just get boring, especially if you are living together my guess is that you do it at least every other day. That can get tired, but usually if you keep pushing then he will give in, and like it. What pisses me off is when girls claim to be so damn horny and then just lay there and wiggle through an orgasm or two. But that doesn't seem to be you, you said you offered to do all the work. He most likely was playing hard to get just to make you squirm, and try to get it even more, because now you are wondering what is up....

/\/e\/\/R/\ge

quote:Originally posted by Sarcophagus:

Scenario:

I woke up this morning in the middle of a sex dream, horny as anything, panties wet, the works. I rolled over on top of my guy and started kissing his neck, snuggling etc (this usually gets him hard) but there was very little reaction. He had been awake for awhile, and had even been up and out of bed, but I assumed he was still sleepy so I eventually rolled off and went back to sleep. In my sleep I had an even more intense sex dream and when I woke up 2 hours later I was absolutely craving sex, I mean aching for it.

We both got up out of bed, he went to check email and I went to get some clothes sorted for work, and in passing by the office I mentioned "I'm absolutely craving some sex babe!" to which he responded "Well I'm not in the least bit" in sort of a dream-on tone of voice... which totaly puzzled me because 1. He doesn't tend to turn down sex, and 2. Until then he had been in a really good mood, so the tone of his voice was a bit unexpected.

I don't turn down sex, or requests for sex... I'm always game to give blowjobs or bend over, so he wouldn't hold out on me for that reason.

I asked him if I put the work in did he think I could get him turned on and pleasure him, and he agreed that it was physically possibly for him to enjoy it, but he just didn't feel like it... that it would take a lot of work for me.

Now... *sigh* I'm totaly perplexed, and hopefully you fellas can give me some hints because he was less than ready to explain and I didn't push it.

So just in a general guy's perspective:

Should a chick take that as a "leave me alone" and back off (that's what I did)

Or should she take it as a "if you're willing to put all the effort in, then go for it"?

Words from his own mouth have been:

"guys who say that they aren't in the mood are full of shit"

and:

"if you aren't in the mood you should still do it, because once you start you realize that it's really enjoyable"

By the way, if any trolls pipe up with "you're just a needy bitch who won't leave the poor mistreated guy alone" just zip it. We've been relaxing and sleeping in all weekend, he wasn't worn out, and I didn't beg.

I would turn down sex from your ugly ass too.

^^Dipshit, you quoted the entire post just to deliver a 1-line insult? Asshat.

Anyways, Sarc, I said it before and I'll say it again: Drop his ass and make him come to you. You once referred to this as "game playing" but if your bf/fiance truly acts the way you describe on a consistent basis, he has issues to sort out.

And it's not a game. But he sure is playing you..

he's definately playing the game... by the sound of it anyways... i do this from time to time too. sometimes, it's more fun to play hard to get. next time he does it, just tackle him.

another scenario is that maybe, he just wasn't in the mood. sometimes it does happen, especially if he's been oversexed recently. he might have been tired...

i didn't bother reading a lot of the posts after the first, so if i missed something, sorry.

Sarc i'd make you happy, your boyfriends an ass, an ASS . try to see that or alert him of how your always worrying about crap like this. Reasons why, how you want things to be, etc... Be honest about it!

honestly i'd run away from home to date you, you sound awesome!

hey 16 aint young

quote:Originally posted by deadlycindy:

^^Dipshit, you quoted the entire post just to deliver a 1-line insult? Asshat.

Anyways, Sarc, I said it before and I'll say it again: Drop his ass and make him come to you. You once referred to this as "game playing" but if your bf/fiance truly acts the way you describe on a consistent basis, he has issues to sort out.

And it's not a game. But he sure is playing you..

I choose you pikachu.

<A HREF="http://www.pokemoncrater.com/gallery/gallery/Pokemon/Original%20251%20Icons/025.gif">http://www.pokemoncrater.com/gallery/gallery/Pokemon/Original%20251%20Icons/025.gif" width="90" height="90 (http://www.pokemoncrater.com/gallery/gallery/Pokemon/Original%20251%20Icons/025.gif" width="90" height="90)</A>

[This message has been edited by akk (edited 09-30-2003).]

he could of just had a real bad dream and still remembering it and thinking of that iono

I dunno some guys are different. I know a bunch of my friends who could do that. Personally though i dont think i ever could turn it down...

Buy him a bottle of Tribulus terrestris.

He might be experiencing a lack of testosterone, this sometimes happens around 24 years and as a result a man will feel a lot worse.

http://www.bodybuilding.com/store/trib.html

I bought this stuff for weightlifting, but it is supposed to increase the libido also.

It seems that you are wearing your man out, Sarchopagus. If he cannot satisfy your raging libido, I offer myself to be your venting sex toy. I'm not doing it for myself, you know. I feel really bad for your misfortune and I'm ready to sacrifice my spare time to lend you a helping hand. Or any other limb, while I'm at it.

Sarc,

You're in an emotionally abusive relationship. Start playing games or get the hell out of there. And, btw, he’s probably cheating on you, or will start soon.

Wise Up!

-Easy

I wouldnt kid around with that stuff, girls actually believe you when you say their whatever is cheating on them.

wow, its amazing how many people completely over analyzed this situation. sometimes guys who are able to get sex whenever the fuck they want aren't in the mood. i'm not saying its a common thing but it happens. teens with hormones the size of clydesdales and who are willing to move halfway across the globe for a handjob never tire of sex. heh heh, geek come. 420...

He is gay. You think Im kidding



Well I am.

Maybe he has had something go wrong lately, or is just very tired. Lay back on the sex for alittle bit Sarc.

He turned down sex? mistake 1.

He turned down sex with you? mistake 2.

I think you should dump him. Maybe he's gay?

quote:Originally posted by Dystrophy:

I wouldnt kid around with that stuff, girls actually believe you when you say their whatever is cheating on them.

I was dead serious.

You're such a kidder... har har har.

(Psst.... ixnay on the heatingcay)

i say invest in a dildo, get really into it, and if he comes in, and starts wanting some, tell him he missed his chance.

For what it's worth i would have fucked you even if i was still asleep! if not out of curdousy then out of mutual re-fucking-spect.

don't see what difference it makes now, but what you should have done was been creative, IE you're at the breakfast table and you would have dropped a fork and been all like oops let me get that then went down and pulled out his cock. that would have put him in the mood quick.

once erect, the incredible cat like horniness would have made him sure to fuck you.

Its not a matter of respect. If you're not in the mood, you're not in the mood. Its not like you can just get turn him into a mindless zombie by popping the pipesnake up.

he must be REALLY pissed off at you. no man, i repeat NO MAN in his right mind does not want sex at any time at all!

sarc, he is VERY annoyed/offended/angry at you. you are a very very bad girl.

quote:Originally posted by akk:

I would turn down sex from your ugly ass too.

YOu are the most pathetic loser a came across on this board since i joined (that was a while ago cause this isnt my first account (guess why))

but back on topic, well it could be possible that he has been cheating......

You said he'd been awake for awhile. What if he had been bashing the bishop during this "while"?

What the fuck is with all of you people? This has happened to me befor, I dont like it. Its just general depression, or it could be there is no spark left, make it exciting, Try some new things, thats always an option, or you could distance your self for a little bit, do other things, Serporation makes the heart grow stronger. (i went blank, and that sounded close)

And as much as i hate to say it, because i know that you will freak out, and auto maticly think that he is cheating on you, but he may be, or he may soon, he is feeling bored, like he can get sex any time he wants, its not that great an experiance.

I know what does it for me every time, is for you to act dirty. Try to imitate that expression that most women lose, The one that says "Im being dirty and i know it, so what are you going to do about it?" &lt;== I lOve that.

*reads Sarc's topic and impulsively starts making suggestive slapping actions with both hands*

I have no clue what the hell is wrong with this scenario here.

It appears that she is confused with the fact that a male can turn down sex at any given point, possibly this poor man is merely taking revenge, the one point that Sarc wanted to have sex more than anything the male turned her down demonstrating his ability to take away sex in an attempt to get more in the future

What's the big problem.

He just didn't feel like it. You have never NOT been in the mood.

Having sex every day or every other day. Sometimes you just don't feel like.

Unless its happening often what the hell is the big deal. Shrug it off. In a day or two he will want some.

Just sometimes some people are not in the mood.

Nothing wrong with that.

Maybe he was feeling horney before and jerked off in the morning. Afterwards he wasnt horney. As when you woke up.

Just leave it be as jibberish if it happend once. If it happend a few times. Seek some help.

1. He's a fool, no two ways about it. At least you deserved a better explination.

2. You obviously have fingers. Put them to use.

3. If all else fails, I would never turn you down....

Setting the game-playing possibility aside for now, it's possible he really wasn't in the mood. If this happens again, just go for it. Touches are harder to turn down.. and if he does, you'll be better able to tell if he really isn't in the mood or if he's trying to play you.

im a guy and i know how sometimes you dont really feel in the mood when a girl wants it, but if your in a relationship its all about compromises. you make sacrifices for him and he should do the same for you out of love. it is rude and selfish of him to only turn to you when HE wants it. if he cares about you he will do what he can to make you happy, and once he gets erect, there is only one cure

he was awake, unresponsive and pretended to be in a good mood at work, but he wasnt.

All these things link back to depression, i couldnt give a shit about sex when im depressed and it seems neither does he.

but again he might be awake with guilt and satisfied from cheating.... maybe, but who knows

quote:Originally posted by akk:

I would turn down sex from your ugly ass too.

Hey, ass hat. Was it absolutely necessary for you to quote her entire post? While I'm on the subject, I think she said, and I paraphrase, for ass hats (like you) who intend to post asinine comments (like yours) to zip it. Where's the ambiguity in her opening statement?

- seek_42

quote:Originally posted by Easy Going:



Sarc,

You're in an emotionally abusive relationship.

-Easy





There's no way you can make this assertion unless you are her therapist or some other such knowledgeable person, Dr. Ruth.

quote:Originally posted by Easy Going:



And, btw, he’s probably cheating on you, or will start soon.

Wise Up!





Again, there's no way that you can make this assertion unless you are her significant other, Oprah. You sound like the Q & A section of Woman's World magazine; shut your cake hole unless you can offer some helpful suggestions, mmmkay? Mmmkay.

- seek_42