I usually wouldn't come to the internet for love advice but I don't like talking about it with people I know and since nobody on here knows who I am, here it goes.

There's this girl I've known since 8th grade, and we were interested in each other but some other guy asked her out before I could make any moves. Then I moved to a different part of the city and never saw her again really outside of maybe 3 times but we talked online. She transfered to my high school this year and we found each other in lunch. She just broke up with some guy she was serious with about 2 months ago.

Now what I need advice with is I've found that I really want to get with her and I think she kind of wants to get with me but there's a few things stopping me.

Has she had enough time to get over her last guy?

Have we known each other too long to be anything but friends?

Should I just stop being a pussy about it and ask her if she wants to go on a date?

Any answers to these questions would help, I know people are different but there's got to be some general answers. Flame me or whatever if you want to be a fag, but it'd help me to have some serious answers.

Simple questions.

Simple Answers.

It depends on the girl, maybe she's had enough time, maybe not. I'd say two months is generally enough time though.

No, being friends is no an barrier. As a matter of fact, it can just be that much better. It just means that you don't have to go through the getting to know you bullshit.

And yes, if you want to do it you should stop being a pussy and just ask her. If you don't do it soon then she may take up with somebody else. Don't miss your window of opportunity.

quote:Originally posted by Iron:

Don't miss your window of opportunity.

you already missed your oppurtunity once before. so i agree. don't miss it again. go for it son

That's what I've been thinking and I going to ask her, but god damn it's going to be a bitch to get the nerve to do it, cuz I won't do that shit online, it's got to be face to face for me.

ok cuz this is how it is.... you missed your chance the first time most of us dont get a second chance so go for it.....even if she hasent gotten over dude and your her "rebound" at least your gonna get laid and isnt that what it is all about??? because guys and girls or men and woman cannot be friends cause men wanna fuck them or chicks want to have a relationship with em so go for it dont be scared all she can say is no but I doubt it

Has she had enough time to get over her last guy?

we can't tell you, the only one who knows is here, so you have to talk to her to find out

Have we known each other too long to be anything but friends?

ofcourse not.. though it might make it a bit harder..

Should I just stop being a pussy about it and ask her if she wants to go on a date

Yes, ofcourse, you only life once (or at least as far as is proven at this point) and really, what do you have to lose



[This message has been edited by dark-easterbunny (edited 09-28-2003).]

I could not find it, but someone posted this line recently:

"Have you ever thought of me as more than a friend."

Use it.

-Easy

I hate to bump this up is it normal to just not want to do it whenever you see the chick?

edit- What I'm talking about is I lose all interest when I see her and then when she's gone I get it again.

[This message has been edited by D-Loc 1605 (edited 09-30-2003).]

Well, if I were in you're position, I would go for it, ask her out to a movie or something. Move up nice and slow. Take your time man, no rush. Oh yeah, off the topic but KMK is the shit and their concerts are awesome.

definately go ahead and ask her something. dont be fooled by everyone and just blurt out one day "hey, lets have a deep and meaningful conversation about your feelings and mine!" (or something similar). ask her out, but do it in a friendly way. believe me, becoming friends with her is not a barrier for sex or affection - in fact it usually only intensifies it when it does happen. as for the feeling leaving you while you are with her, thats something to bring up in the future. "you know, when we are hanging out, its just hanging out. but when you arent around i think about you a lot". something to this effect and, man you are IN. but definately go for it soon, high school is a small pond full of sharks when it comes to dating n shit.

quote:What I'm talking about is I lose all interest when I see her and then when she's gone I get it again.

Sounds like you want to date the girl you knew before you moved.

Why are you obsessing on this particular girl, anyway? Does she have a golden pussy? There is no "one" girl, instead, there are millions of them for you to choose.

quote:Originally posted by spunky_junky:

you already missed your oppurtunity once before. so i agree. don't miss it again. go for it son



I second that...Go for it dude!

quote:Originally posted by L3d3ni:

Sounds like you want to date the girl you knew before you moved.

Why are you obsessing on this particular girl, anyway? Does she have a golden pussy? There is no "one" girl, instead, there are millions of them for you to choose.

I'm obsessing over her, what I meant was that I whenever I see her after I decided to ask I lose all interest. After I moved away I wasn't interested in her, but now that I see her more the interest is there.

Anyways, sorry to bump up this thread, I just checked it again after a few days and I just wanted to respond to that.

quote:Originally posted by D-Loc 1605:

Should I just stop being a pussy about it and ask her if she wants to go on a date?

You answered your own question.

Take Care,

Kangy

"Have you ever thought of me as more than a friend?" is the quickest way to get a deer-in-the-headlights stare unless she's completely on your wavelength. From the sounds of it, that's not the case.

If you're already friends, asking her out on a date can be easier or harder than if she was someone you just met. Believe it or not, just asking her out might be harder.. or it might not. Depends on the girl and your approach. That's a judgment call.

If you've got a good feeling, but you're not sure, I would recommend patience. Chill out and build things up slowly. Touch her a little more, hugs, arm around the shoulder, things like that. Look at her. If you catch her gaze, linger a bit. This will not only begin to show her that you might have some interest (since she very well may not be aware, and could even be in the same unsure position as you), but it will help you see if you're right about how she feels. If it becomes clear she's not interested, you can back off without quite as much of a blow to your ego or the friendship.

More important than that, however, is the heightening of tension. It can become difficult, I'll warn you now. You stand a better chance of making something with her stick and be worthwhile this way, though. If she's not interested, she won't be regardless of what you do. If she's very interested, again, that won't change unless you completely fuck up. If she's on that middle ground, though, creating a buildup to the point where you finally start going out will hold her attention and make you both feel like you've spent time and, in a way, worked to make it happen. Were you to simply say, "Hey, want to go on a date?", and she said yes, her interest could quickly fade because the challenge of winning you over never existed.

It's a bit complex if you try to absorb it all at once. Keep in mind that I've been seeing this shit for over a decade now, while you're new to it, so it's easy for me to explain, maybe much moreso than it is to understand. For now, it's enough to take it slow and easy, but always try to progress things a bit if she appears open to it.

I must say that is probably the best girl advice I've ever heard in my entire life man. Not to kiss your ass cuz you're a moderator or anything but god damn, I'll have to save that shit, thanks dude.

Not kissing arse either but Spiffy always knows his shit when it comes to this sorta thing.