Well, im going on a vacation with my whole fucking family woo-fucking-hoo...So anywho, since im not around to please my girlfriend, she was thinking about somesort of dildo or something, but neither one of us is going to buy and or order one, so she wants one homemade, sorta..and she likes anal sometimes too, soo...help damnit

Anything that's nearly cylindrical and will fit. Just make sure she puts a condom over her cucumbers or drum sticks or shower heads..

Don't need fungus, pond scum, or whatever else might infest her homemade sex toys. (Termites!)

Have you heard that urban legend about the gay guy and the black widows? Well, don't use random pieces of wood. (You'd think that's be a given though).

And speaking of urban legends.. fon't use lobsters either. Ugh..

Or you can just buy a vibe. Why won't you? It's a worthwhile investment. And either way, if she's going to be that horny that she needs a homemade penis, perhaps a better shaped rubber one will do her good whether you go away or not.

[This message has been edited by MrMojoRisin (edited 08-28-2003).]

HAHAHA, pieces of wood,Ill tell her that, hahah,

J/k

But that was hella funny.

go to spencers.... if they give you a funny look, tell them it's a gag gift for someone's birthday

quote:Originally posted by EyeSore:

go to spencers.... if they give you a funny look, tell them it's a gag gift for someone's birthday

why all the secrecy and shame? tell em you have a hot g/f and she needs a substitute for your amazing abilities while you're away. 420...