Ok... this isn't like that other post... I've gone out with this girl before... twice. I do think I love her, if it was infatuation I'd be over that by now. Also, she's about to break up with her current "bad boyfriend" and I want to take a shot at it agian. But, today I was at her house with my best friend, his brother and the girls friend. Anyways... I was there right and we were all playing around, like playful not sexually, and then like, she really didn't seem to have a lot of interest in me. And she already knows how I feel about her I've told her before. The next time I go up there, like sometime next week. I'm going to tell her about how I feel again, and hope something happens. Any advice? Comments, questions on anything else? This is what I'm planning on doing and I was wondering if it would work.

Relationships have to start at the beginning. I'm sure you have heard a story of someone telling someone exactly how they feel right off the bat and it working, but that is the exception rather than the rule. Often, telling a girl that you love her before you are together can insure that you get nowhere. It can be seen as creepy, or desperate, or that you have no self esteem, or that you have no clue because how can you love her already. Just ask her out and play it cool.

-Easy

[This message has been edited by Easy Going (edited 08-21-2003).]

Hmmm, that seems possible but like yea... I've gone out with her before... she knows damn well I like her ALOT. And like yea...

if you're going to try to get her back, you can't just be like "yea, so i still like you, want to go out again?" it just doesn't work like that.

what you want to do is really wow her. make her remember why she dated you the first time. do something really sweet, that reminds her of when you two used to date.

do something really nice, like show up at her door holding flowers and her favorite stuffed animal (ie. if she likes dolphins, buy a stuffed dolphin). say something like "i still want you, take me back, i miss being with you". chicks really dig shit like that.

Hmm.... this seems true... I should try one of these... But I'm on the phone with her right now (shes talkin to someone on her other line right now (damn call waiting)) And like well she likes my best friend but she still likes me because her best friend likes me too but her best friend is in fucking love with me which is why we could never hold a relationship... anyways I'm going to try that stuffed animal thing. But theres a problem how do I get her to realize that if she likes me we should go out.

Ok, stop right there - no desperate gifts or flower bouquets or "take me back please" cards. That's just a bad idea - you want her to know you have self-esteem and confidence, that you're not desperate and sad. Just continue hanging around her, and you know what? The reason she might not seem to take interest in you and push you away is because she DOES like you, as strange as that may seem. She may be in her own mental prison of denial, guilt, uncertainty, whatever. For all you know, someday, she's going to cave. All you need to do is play it cool - be a good friend, try not to be a moody fuckup (I'm not saying you are), be nice, be you. Even if she doesn't have the feelings I just mentioned, she may realize why she liked you again, and may start to grow close. You never know. Final advice, though: Don't get your hopes unrealistically high, ever.

-Infrared

i stick by my first assertion, being sweet is the way back into her heart. then after that, the pride can take over. but you'll catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.

Hmmmm..... Someone has tried that "Be her friend way" and that's all we still are, but I'm going to try it anyways, it seems more logical and I get to do less (great for a lazy person ) Wow... after reading my last posts I seem to have seemed depressed. Thats odd for me I'm never depressed for long. Well anyways I guess I'm cool now, I'm just going to be her friend and see what happens there, Thanks guys for helping me out.

in my vast experience with women, most of them won't go for the guy who likes them a lot.

if you play "hard to get" or whatever you wanna call it, she'll probably want you.

many girls i have got has been through total ignorance...i just say "alright" to them and walk away like what they think about me doesn't matter and they'll think "hold it...i'm sexy...and he's ignoring me...gotta go and get this guy!"

girls always want what they can't have mate...it's just the female psyche.

quote:Originally posted by psycho_8b:

girls always want what they can't have mate...it's just the female psyche.

It's the human psyche in general. Remember that, boys, when some girl starts being too much of a tease because she caught you staring.. you can fall into the trap as well.

If she knows you like her, there's no need to say it again. Push, and she'll end up farther away. Just go with the flow... things may not work now, but if you don't do anything stupid, nothing says they won't work out in six months or something.