Alright so here goes the whole deal. went out with this one guy for about 6 months, im not going to use real names so lets just call him Bob. well anyway things were perfect for the first 2 months about.. like all relationships are. and then after that we had to work to keep our relationship going. like most ppl. but then near the end of our relationship things kinda started to get distant. we both knew things werent working out. so i finally ended it. not because i didnt love him anymore but because things werent working and itd just be hurting us even more. well anyway we have been apart for a little over a month and we still have a lot of feelings for each other. the thing is.. i kinda have feelings for this otehr guy. we can clal him Fred. Me and Fred have kind of had a thing for each other off and on ever since we met. but nothing ever came of it. after me and bob had broken up tho i was almost sure me and fred would get together but then things started getting confusing. for example he kind of just stopped tlaking to me like he used to. and we never hung out anymore. and he claims this is because he knows im not sure what i want with bob so hes giving me space and he doesnt want him to be a reason for not getting back togehter with bob. i understand all that. and fred and one of my other close friends were talking i guess and he brought up a few other good reasons. bob and fred used to be pretty good friends untill i came along. they used to be the best and now they hardly talk. fred doesnt tihnk he can face bob if me and fred got together just becasue he knows how bob feels about me and he couldnt do that to someone hes friends with. so anyway right now things are kind of complicated. me and bob have been hanging out a lot recently and im just not sure what i should do. i think giving fred a try would be fun and id be happy and all but it seems like its not going the greatest right now becuse he never wants to do anything because he wants to give me space.. so i dont see how i am ever going to decide who id want to be with. there are good points and bad points to both guys, they are like totaly differnt ppl and its just so hard to have to choose. and dont tell me to just pick neither because thats not an option right now. i relaly want to be with bob, but i also want to give fred a try because its always just going to feel unfinished because thats the way our relationship has been ever since we met. first we met and he had a gf and we both liked each other anyway but.. he had a gf so nothing happend, then him and his gf broke up and i had a bf. just bad timing i sapose. well anyway give me ur thoughts. thnx!

First off, use paragraphs. It is alot easier to read and you will get more replies to help you out with your situation.

My advice to you, would be to pick the one that you think is the best for you, and you can imagine yourself with 6 months or a year from now.

Also take into consideration, that they were friends, and maybe you shouldn't try to get in between there friendship. I am not saying you are doing it on purpose, but you will be if you date one and not the other. So maybe you should just forget about them both, just become good friends but don't have a relationship.

Dear Ms. aklja: You're confusing the sh_t out of Fred!! Sorry, but the only advice I have is to EITHER do the one thing you said you can't do.....DECIDE BETWEEN THEM, or get rid of both of them and find someone who isn't messed up by the triangle you've created! It's your INDECISION that has Fred on hold. And YOU are the only one who can break that hold and get him to move. SO (DUH) MAKE A DECISION!!! Remember, ANY decision is better than NO decision at all. Love, Venus.

yea paragraphs would be nice i read to the 4 line and had to stop when i scrolled down

sorry about the no paragraphs.. but i need advice. next time i will remember the paragraphs.

go with whichever one your heart choses best thing i can tell ya

good advice.. but i cant say that i know what my hearts telling me.

Hello, Katti. This is your ex-boyfriend.

Give me a call, please.

Okay, so you're not Katti. But that really scared the shit out of me, because you live in Michigan, and you described my last relationship damn near to a tee. =)

Please don't scare me like that. =P

[This message has been edited by Trueborn Vorpal (edited 08-17-2003).]

any more advice??? please

shoot one that lowers it done to one like i said whichever one your heart choses if it cant decide go with the flow

Hey Olivia, it's me! Give ME a call, please. Alright, so you're not Olivia. But much like the other guy above, that scared the crap out of me...you described situation I was/am in. But being like the "Fred" in your story, I say you should probably let both of them go. Don't break up their friendship. It would probably be fine to be a PART of their friendship, but don't be any more than that. Good friendship is important, don't come between that when you have an option not to.

yeah well u see bob doesnt know that i kinda like fred.. :S that can be good and bad i sapose. but fred obviously knows i like bob. and him. and they dont talk to eachother much at all anymore, and yes i admit it might have been from my doing the past year.

well u see, ive gone out wiht Bob a couple times, frist time it just wasnt working out at all , so we broke up. and then about a month later i met Fred (at this time he had a gf) but non the less told Bob that he liked me.. and Bob , still having feelings for me , got mad.

So im not sure if i could take all the blame there. I dont think it was anyones fault on how that happened. Fred was just being honest to his friend. and then after that.. they just havnt talked as much.