What an odd topic header!

Thats what I'm feeling though, I'll explain. (You can skip the background info if you don't like reading)

I'm a geek, I come from a family of geeks... my aunt, uncle, grandpa, and mum have all been teachers. They LOVE knowledge and I'm an only child so the focus of imparting their knowledge has always been onto me... can't really say I always appreciated it much. :P

We're a National Geographic watching type family, we're fuckin wierd... but I respect it. I take some pride in being able to identify a bird by its song, and knowing how to start fire with rocks, and what to eat and what not to eat in the woods. My point: we know shit that most people don't bother knowing.



Background:

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If you look at the four personality types (Melancholy, Sanguin, Choleric, and Flagmatic - and I'm just listing these because its the only personality definitions I know of) my father would be Sanguin - Choleric, displayed in him as outgoing, life of the party, controlling, dominant, argumentative. My mum would be Flagmatic - Melancholy, displayed in her as occasionally shy, easygoing, relaxed, contemplative.

I've matured from Choleric - Sanguin, as a child, to within the past 5 years Melancholy - Flagmatic. I still retain some Choleric in that I am very much in control of myself, but I no longer try to exert control on others. I'm much more easygoing now, I don't enjoy arguing like I used to and I try my best to stay out of arguments unless something is important enough to me to get me riled up. My dad and I used to be at each others throats and thats probably why I changed so much, the fear of becoming like him really got to me.

My dad... *sigh* he's got this thing...

If I said "the sky is blue"

he would say "NO its not!"

UNLESS my mum said "yes, its blue"

and THEN...

he would say "oh, really? ok, its blue."

...and that FUCKS ME OFF!!!! He argues with me JUST because its me, or because I'm younger, or just because he likes to argue, or SOMETHING... I don't even know WHY, but he does and its so bloody unnerving.

End Background.

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I don't open my mouth to spout bullshit... I HATE looking stupid so unless I KNOW something I stay quiet. The only time I ever offer information is when its something I KNOW... now considering that I'm fairly intelligent and have a wide knowledge base, and knowing that I don't offer anything as fact unless I'm sure of it, wouldn't YOU surmise that if I offered you some information that you could pretty much trust it?!

My fiance and I took a trip to a museum yesterday, and in passing through the bird section (cassowaries, emus, ostriches, etc.) I mentioned that cassowaries are a danger to humans, that they have killed humans. He gave me this shit about the sign under the cassowary not saying anything about them being dangerous, and that he couldn't see how they could kill anyone. I got frustrated by this and my suggestion to him was that if he didn't fucking believe me that he could look it up online, which he said he would... but I can't fucking believe it, I just can't get over it! It reminds me so much of my father, arguing with me for no fucking reason! I love my dad, but I could never marry anyone like him, that would drive me fucking insane.

My fiance used to appreciate my intelligence, but the way he treats me now leaves me feeling like a fucking moron... I have to go through this shit to back up things that I've gone to the trouble of learning... I shouldn't have to carry around a full set of encyclopedias to prove everything I say...

I've tried talking to him, hasn't changed anything... getting really sick of this. I want to be taken seriously again...

Have you ever had anything like this happen to you? Do you know someone who has out of the blue just started taking issue and arguing with damn near everything you say?

Or have you suddenly started thinking that someone was a blithering idiot?

[This message has been edited by Sarcophagus (edited 08-04-2003).]

[This message has been edited by Sarcophagus (edited 08-04-2003).]

I didn't read the post, but definately don't do it! Sex with your father is a bad, bad thing.



Shek

Post 666

[This message has been edited by Prince Charming (edited 08-04-2003).]

I can see what you mean about people who always have to argue with you, but everyone knows somebody like that. Obviously opinions of somebody can change just like that in a minute over night etc. Just how life is maybe you've changed and this person just seems different. Things change if they didn't it would be boring.

I think you're making a bigger deal out if this than it really is. Relationships mature, everyone at some point goes, "Remember when we first started going out...?" The beginning is always great and easy. The better he knows you, the more he is comfortable around you. If he questions or disagrees with something you say, he'll voice his opinion. You shouldn't get angry just because he doesn't believe or agree with everyrthing you say, because that would make you just like your dad: controlling. Don't let it bother you, be more easy going.

BTW, if you've read any Freud, you'd know we all are attracted to people like our parents. Ehh, just some food for thought.

My oh my, absolutely, yes. Especially recently, details of which I can't discuss publicly due to possible felony charges.

When you're the sort of unusual person that seeks knowledge and has amassed an internal enyclopedia of facts and info, you have to realize that not everyone does this. Such an endeavor is beyond the scope (and time constraints) of the average person.

At some point, your smarts and potential to learn may have superceded that of your fiance, or at least that's how he might perceive it. Guys don't like that. Perhaps, like me, you need to bond with a dude who is smarter than you.

Plus, I don't know if this applies to you, but I haven't quite mastered the art of intelligent conversation without coming off like a know-it-all, or worse, a "thinks-she-knows-it-all" sometimes. My close friends know me better, but I sometimes make strangers/acquaintences uncomfortable.

Meh.

I can see how me giving only this one example can make it seem like I am blowing it out of proportion, but it is only one most recent example of many.

Also, I don't mind if he disagrees with an opinion of mine, I appreciate it that he is a brainy guy and can argue his own point when it comes to debatable things like how we feel about something, I like the challenge... I like that he stimulates my mind....

What bothers me is when he argues about things that are not open to debate... Casowarries have killed humans, its fact... its recorded, its something I have learned to be true...

If I had said "ya know, that bird looks like it could kill a human" and he had said "nah, I don't think so" then that would've been fine...

But he argued with something that I offered as cold hard FACT... when someone I know to be a reputable source of information presents me with a believable FACT I take the opportunity to learn...

Cindy - lol, felony aye?

I was an info-spouting geek as a child and got made fun of for it, so now I only offer information that I think the person I am with will find interesting. I'm not cocky about it, which is part of the reason I feel so insulted when my accuracy comes into question... I only bother because he IS an intelligent guy and seems to have the same appreciation for knowledge and I think that he will actually enjoy my occasional useless little tidbit... he used to... now I'm just WRONG, always wrong... argh

I have no valuable morality lesson to impart onto you, though I do have one question..

Umm, yeah.. What?.. Ahem.. Nevermind.

i didnt read the post to you nasty fuck!

[This message has been edited by Latin1052 (edited 08-04-2003).]

Life is too short to spend with people you can't stand.

hmmm.... i didnt really read any of it but i think u should fuck him anyways... he is your dad and you have certain responsibilities that u must uphold. if he wants you to fuck him its your moral obligation to please him, and it will put u in a good position with him.

just bite the bullet and do what u gotta do

the slipster